I'm hoping that you guys can give me a bit of, well, clarification (if that's the right word) about my situation. For as long as I can remember, I've had feelings for girls, but not long after I started puberty I began to notice guys. I always found myself attracted to the male form and began lookign at gay porn and paying more attention to the guys in straight porn. I was always of the opinion that I was probably gay. I then started dating girls and for a long time, I forgot about guys. I had no problem making love to girls and falling in love etc was no problem. Then whenever I broke up with them or our relationships were a bit rocky I would find myself looking at gay porn etc. Anyway, I've been single for about a year now and I started going on CraigsList and free dating websites and have had a couple of gay encounters (no sex). I started chatting online with a guy and got to know him over the course of a few months and we finally met and went on a date. The next week we had an argument and went our seperate ways. I missed his texts and phonecalls terribly. I found myself getting jealous when I saw he was in a relationship on facebook. What confuses me is that my family and friends see me as this arrogant, narcissistic jack the lad and I would never be able to come pout as Bisexual to them. I value closeness with a man the same I do with women but when I see myself in 20 years its with a wife and kids. When I think of being sexually intimate, its with me running my hands down a woman's body. I have no desire to have penetrative sexwith a man (although I would maybe try it) I just don't understand myself. I'm in a position now where I've been chatting to a guy and he wants to meet me. I think I've been leading him on a bit - he wants a relationship but he knows my situation regarding me not being out to my family and friends but he asked whether i was top or bottom and I told him I wasn't sure. I'd like to have someone to spend time with, but I don't want the sex. I feel like a mess. Sorry for the long waffle. Hopefully some of you can give me a few words of wisdom!