Who Barebacks?

[896202]

I made an informed and carefully researched decision, and for the past 5 years I am a barebacker. That said, I have in place my own "protocol" on what is accepted or not.

I am Neg and I have had two boyfriends who are Undetectable. No cum inside me. I trusted them and they respected it. It is about that sexual cumplicity, trust, respect with a partner, and that touch skin on skin. There is no comparision to the feeling when you have a condom.

I check my status every three months, between the 1st and the 5th of the month, give or take. I created a routine and it is always better knowing than not knowing your HIV status. As a gay man, I see many gays who are afraid to test and therefore they "don`t care". I find it sad, really.

It is believed more and more that Undetectable guys are far more reliable than those who say they are Neg and they do not really know. Undetectable guys have to be checked every 3 months at least. That in itself is an assurance that proper medical care is being taken. It is practically impossible nowadays to distinguish in the public who is and who is not poz. The advances in medicines have been tremendous.

So, my suggestion is: educate yourself before making a decision. Talk to your doctor (mine knows that I bareback). Keep up with the news on any of the many medical websites. It is not rocket science to find it.

Last, but not the least, I in fact have a pretty much quiet sexual life. Given my very crazy working hours, IF I have sex 4 times a month I am lucky, but each one is special. I have my little and tight Buddy circle. I have minimal interaction with guys out of that circle, but it happens. I always ask the other guy status and we should always do that. With all information in hands, establish your own protocol and then make your decision. This issue is highly divisive like me ny others, therefore you make this decision yourself!

And most important: be honest to yourself and to those who you engage in sexual encounters.

 

[Bunny35]

I bareback, and i do so because i have a huge fetish for feeling a guy cum inside me. That feeling of being bred is one of my major turn on's. One load or a dozen, I just love knowing a guy has unloaded in my hole.

Now to qualify this for the people who think i am irresponsible! I am neg and other virus free. I only do BB with other neg and virus free men, which means we are safe. Of course there is a risk that i may be lied too. However I don't shag at the first flash of a compliment and discuss my preferences and requirements in order to minimize risk. Sure there is still a risk, but no more than crossing the road, or a one time drunken fuck with some slapper at the back of the disco!

 

[santyago]

How i know that another men are virus free?

 

[mikeyinbrooklyn]

I do not condemn people who choose to bareback or suppress your right to do it. But every time one barebacks, you risk multiple different infections to both you and your partner. Even frequent testing can be flawed or missing a very recent infection. If you always chose to drive drunk and without a seatbelt, you might never get killed or kill someone else. But the odds of both are dramatically increased and only partially in you or your partner's control.

I have a friend who lost his partner to AIDS in 1998. He was negative. He played safe for several years thereafter. But then he gave up condoms, mostly out of hubris, thinking he lived without infection as the lover of a man with HIV. But in 2005 he was diagnosed. While he is generally healthy, it has been life altering for the worse, both with finances (he is essentially broke due to the cost of his drugs, which cost quite a bit more than a condom), and with relationships. He lives with guilt and shame because he likely infected 2 partners who didn't mind barebacking with him before he knew he was positive.

I can't understand why feeling someone cum inside you is worth the risk of your life and lifestyle, or the lives of others. Then again, my late Uncle John liked whiskey more than he liked his liver, and he passed at 43.

 

[Hairylegs]

Uhm guys, being "undetectable" means undetectable in your blood. It doesn't mean undetectable in your semen. And to boot, "undetectable" means you have under 50 virons per ml of blood. It doesn't mean there are no virus particles circulating in your blood. Just sayin'.

 

[Lord_of_Goon]

This thread is stupid

 

[luvinlife83]

Its well known that sex without condoms is classed as unsafe, some guys wear condoms and some choose not to.
When it comes down to it, its the personal choice of those sexual partners whether they do or not.

Lets NOT get into a slagging match on the rights and wrongs of barebacking., leave that for other threads.

but...

Who is willing to admit honestly that they bareback? please do not answer if you have done it in that past, this is a question relating to if you bareback frequently.

1st: I have barebacked (bottomed twice) and bareback (topped) 3 times. However, I never do it without seeing some papers first.

2nd: And this may sound very stupid (forgive me if it's already been mentioned) but if two men are clean how is two men barebacking any more unsafe than a man and women barebacking.
Men and women bareback in porn ALL.THE.TIME, and no one is concerned. They get tested regularly and go on about their live, but barebacking in gay porn is dangerous. If all parties are clean, how is it unsafe?

 

[bjbottom]

I only bareback, but I am in a committed relationship.

 

[mikeyinbrooklyn]

2nd: And this may sound very stupid (forgive me if it's already been mentioned) but if two men are clean how is two men barebacking any more unsafe than a man and women barebacking.
Men and women bareback in porn ALL.THE.TIME, and no one is concerned. They get tested regularly and go on about their live, but barebacking in gay porn is dangerous. If all parties are clean, how is it unsafe?

Unsafe sex between a man and a woman is also unsafe sex. But remember a few things that are different between gay and straight sex:

1) Among those not in a monogamous relationship, gay men have more sex partners than heterosexual women, increasing the chances of exposure to infection.
2) Anal sex can cause more minor tears than vaginal sex, leading to higher risk of infection if a partner is positive. Anal sex is, obviously, much more common in a gay sexual encounter- especially out of a relationship- than it is in a straight one.
3) Gay or straight, the bottom (receiving) partner is more likely to get infected. Afterall, fluids are injecting into the bottom. Straight sex for a man has a tiny chance of infecting him with HIV (although tons of other infections are easier to catch). Between bottoming and being versatile, most sexually active gay men are recipients at least sometimes.
4) There is no way to know for sure that a partner is clean, even in a relationship. HIV (and other STDs) can fail to show up on a test for quite some time, while a carrier is still able to spread disease. Some test results are also incorrect. And, although rare, you can be exposed to HIV outside of sex (one of my closest friends has HIV and he got it due to a medical accident). Plus, unless you are with someone 24 hours a day, you cannot be certain they are faithful, gay or straight, married or not.
5) The porn industry is full of STDs, including a lot of HIV. You can google to see how the LA-based porn industry was actually shut down for a little while this year due to a rash of infections among straight performers. California has been struggling to more tightly regulate the industry, to the point of requiring condemns in intercourse scenes. I do not know the status of that legislation. Gay porn stars, especially in the bareback side of the industry, have sky-high infection rates. The porn world is full of early deaths, including many, many suicides. It's tragic. They don't even make that much money.
6) Bareback sex is not a civil rights issue. No one can stop anyone else from having it. But it is a terribly reckless behavior, especially among gay men not in a monogamous relationship. That's not picking on anyone, it is acknowledging statistics.

I would advise all gay men to avoid bareback sex. It's never safe. But if you are going to have it, obviously it is less risky with regular testing, verification of your partner's status, being in a monogamous relationship (or at least not barebacking with everyone), etc.

HIV is, thank God, not the automatic death sentence it once was. But treatment does not work for everyone. Even those treated suffer significant long-term health complications from the treatment. Treatment is very expensive, for the rest of your life. If you are positive, you have a legal obligation to inform every recent and future partner of your status, for the rest of your life. Failure to do that can land you (justifiably) in prison.

Being willing to throw away your life, potentially other people's lives, your money, and your general well being as a human is a high price to pay for primal pleasure. One of the justifications homophobes (mostly in the past) used to discriminate against gay people was that our community was accused of being just a bunch of sex-crazed fiends, reckless to others and themselves, and not a good fit with the community. Why try to prove them right?

 

[Troyimcumming]

Who likes to bareback? And for those of you who do, who likes to keep the cum in their ass? For me barebacking is the best being both a top and bottom, and feeling of cum in my ass is irresistible.

 

[Bunny35]

Love to BB! That feeling of being bred is one of my favorite things about sex, and I always keep the cum inside me. Even better if there is more than one load.

 

[Troyimcumming]

Who likes to bareback? And for those of you who do, who likes to keep the cum in their ass? For me barebacking is the best being both a top and bottom, and feeling of cum in my ass is irresistible.

 

[BikerBear]

Providing you're in a monogamous relationship and have both been tested as negative, it's the BEST!!!!

 

[Exbiker]

Does anyone care about their own health? Or that of other people?

I realise these are controversial questions, and hope nobody is unduly upset by them...

:frown1:

 

[AlexDB9]

Does anyone care about their own health? Or that of other people?

I realise these are controversial questions, and hope nobody is unduly upset by them...

:frown1:

Yes, bareback feels awesome. That said, I'm one of the few of my circle of friends from 23 years ago who is still alive. I use condoms every time unless I'm in a committed, monogamous relationship with someone I trust implicitly. I've never had a single disease and I'm 45.

 

[EdWoody]

You're free to do whatever you want, it's your life to lose. But I think you're both being stupid and self destructive and irresponsible.

 

[jjpooks]

Breeding is hot... its one of my fantasies.. HOT as hell but i admit its so scary

 

[kelvinza]

Depends on who i hv sex with

 

[Bunny35]

You're free to do whatever you want, it's your life to lose. But I think you're both being stupid and self destructive and irresponsible.

Maybe you should consider a persons situation before being judgmental!....I am in a monogamous relationship of 10 years, both negative.

 

[AJnCJ]

Yes to the BB
In a monogamous, committed relationship for 10+ years
That said, I'd rather swallow my partners load than anything so lots more oral than anal here...