who here has chosen to stay eternally single?

[coveryerteeth]

Most gay guys expect a full menu of sexual expression that includes anal sex...and I have no interest in that...

Wait. So, no man will ever get the chance to tap your hot ass? I'm all for respecting personal boundaries, but that seems a little bit like owning a Stradivarius that's kept under glass and never played, to me.

I don't mean to criticize, you understand. More of just my roundabout way of not-so-subtly implying that I'd jump at the chance to do naughty, naughty things with you. :wink:

I refuse to do that. And since I spent $6k on the laser hair removal (that didn't even fucking work) I am basically pennyless now.

Despite what I wrote, after all the years of no one wanting you, you feel worthless and unloved. It's gotten to the point where I don't think anyone will ever want me.

I think the stigma that our society places on sex workers is entirely irrational and unfortunate. That said, if enlisting the services of a "professional" doesn't appeal to you, you're far from a lost cause. Take it from me, there is no shortage of slutty people in this world! I don't care who you are or what issues you contend with, ANYONE - absolutely anyone - can get laid for free if they're willing to put in the leg-work.

Sluts don't just fall from the sky, unfortunately. You have to beat the bushes, a little. You can trust me. I'm pretty slutty. I know what I'm talking about. :biggrin1:

Out of curiosity, have you tried NoNo? I see late night infomercials for it, all the time. As hair removal systems go, it's pretty damn cheap. Although, self-acceptance is cheaper, of course. Plus, their spokesperson is the gal who played Blair on One Life to Live. She strikes me as the kind of righteous chica who would skewer the voice-box of any huckster that tried to con her into moving his snake oil for him with her stiletto.

 

[OscarM]

Question popped in my mind... do you travel alone, exwhyzee? with friends? how about everyone else?

I've looked into it but the idea seems a bit scary to me... going to a foreign place alone?

C) I am easily frustrated and impatient, which means if I venture into a relationship, it is somewhat doomed from the start. Throw in my intraverted and apathetic disposition, my work schedule, and my love of travel (which not everyone can keep up with), and relationships are doomed.

Am I happy about it? I have learned to be content with myself. Society tells me that I must couple to be happy...but I forge my own path. If I were not content, I would drive myself crazy in not having a partner, and I don't want to live my life wanting for something I might never have. In the meantime, I actually do enjoy my quiet weekends. I enjoy watching tv in bed and hogging all the covers. I enjoy not having to live to someone else's schedule or dealing with their problems. I tend to get very anxious when trying to cope with the actions of past partners. I am calmer going solo.

In the meantime, I might have a few stretches of boredom, but I'm good at figuring out things to keep me occupied.

All that said, if I ever do meet someone who can tolerate me and that I find interesting and attractive...then I'm open-minded to where that might go.

 

[LaFemme]

Am I happy about it? I have learned to be content with myself. Society tells me that I must couple to be happy...but I forge my own path. If I were not content, I would drive myself crazy in not having a partner, and I don't want to live my life wanting for something I might never have. In the meantime, I actually do enjoy my quiet weekends. I enjoy watching tv in bed and hogging all the covers. I enjoy not having to live to someone else's schedule or dealing with their problems. I tend to get very anxious when trying to cope with the actions of past partners. I am calmer going solo.

In the meantime, I might have a few stretches of boredom, but I'm good at figuring out things to keep me occupied.

All that said, if I ever do meet someone who can tolerate me and that I find interesting and attractive...then I'm open-minded to where that might go.

That could have been written by me. I am completely at peace with being alone. My reasons are different, but I am ok with it.

I don't meet men that I connect with very often. I have frequent infatuations, but love has only happened twice in my life - over 20 years apart. It's not that I'm introverted - I'm quite outgoing and well-liked; I just don't connect in a romantic way very often.

Anyway, if it happened I wouldn't turn it away, but I am not actively seeking it. I like having the bed to myself and choosing my own channels.

 

[airc3]

FWIW, I love to travel alone. It's gotten to the point where I hate traveling with other people and dealing with all their issues, wants, and needs. Easier to be on your own.

Question popped in my mind... do you travel alone, exwhyzee? with friends? how about everyone else?

I've looked into it but the idea seems a bit scary to me... going to a foreign place alone?

 

[airc3]

No, I haven't. If a professional laser that burns your flesh doesn't work I don't think NoNo will. I've used the best laser they sell on a very high setting and I can smell my skin burning yet the hair STILL grows back.

Out of curiosity, have you tried NoNo? I see late night infomercials for it, all the time. As hair removal systems go, it's pretty damn cheap. Although, self-acceptance is cheaper, of course. Plus, their spokesperson is the gal who played Blair on One Life to Live. She strikes me as the kind of righteous chica who would skewer the voice-box of any huckster that tried to con her into moving his snake oil for him with her stiletto.

 

[deleted3782]

Boxes are for presents!

...and labels are for soup cans!

Wait. So, no man will ever get the chance to tap your hot ass? I'm all for respecting personal boundaries, but that seems a little bit like owning a Stradivarius that's kept under glass and never played, to me.

I've tried the butt thing...and if I never do it again thats ok. Its great to feel appreciated though! :biggrin1:

Question popped in my mind... do you travel alone, exwhyzee? with friends? how about everyone else?

I've looked into it but the idea seems a bit scary to me... going to a foreign place alone?

I love travelling alone and I do it all the time, but I also have a family member that I get along with very well that goes some places with me. I'm a travel addict, and I don't wanna be cured. :wink:

I like having the bed to myself and choosing my own channels.

...and if I can't get to sleep I have no one to blame but myself!

 

[269616]

I am pretty much eternally single. Have had a few serious gfs, but never engaged or married. Would very much like to find a woman to be with permanently but having been in enough bad relationships or in them for the wrong reasons or with someone who wasn't wanting the same things, I've always preferred to be content and single, than to settle just to be in a relationship. It's more important to me to be with someone special, rather than merely just being with someone to be with someone.

 

[rbkwp]

airc3
Hope, just hope to hear one day you have found someone, or they have found you, who loves appreciates and adores, your hairy-ness
dont fret too much matey (know its easy to say) but ya never know in life
my partner of 8 years had a hairy few splotches, on his back in particular, it never bothered me,nor did i make it an issue, we just lived with it, occasionally i would tickle and make fun of it, with him ..
all damn good, was more than livable, for both of us

mate yr only 27, just started living..............

 

[kiltiesf]

I too am single and pretty much by choice. I'm in the final stages of regaining my financial bearings after the implosion of the financial industry and losing my job, so I've been focusing my energies in reinventing myself. But also having to come to the conclusion that while I'm not 25 anymore and vastly approaching 50, within the gay community makes me a less desirable mate, and I don't fit the often fantasized "hot daddy" type; I've the body of a twink, but not the associated age. While I have body image issues, I possess a healthy self esteem, and realize that I don't require another person to complete me. I have heard about and have witnessed friends who do nothing but complain about their mate and do nothing to improve their relationship or their lives and would rather chew off a limb than to be stigmatized as being single; as if there is some negative connotation with being single. I would prefer being single and content, than in a relationship being miserable for the sake of being able to say that I'm a relationship.

I enjoy my own company. Having lived by myself most of my adult life, I enjoy the freedom to do as I please, when and how I please, without needing to check in. I am romantic, as well as a nurturer, and have been told that I'd make a great "wife" because of my domestic skills, but have found few men who understand that a relationship, like a garden, requires constant attention and maintenance. Also, I am one who wants to be courted, and not be rushed into the physical aspects of a relationship on the first, second or even third date. I want to get the know the man's heart and the head on his shoulders, which tell me who he is, and what he's about first, rather than the head in his pants, which tells me nothing about his character, but rather about how he was "gifted" in the gene pool.

So, if some day I'm blessed to meet him, fall in love, great! If that is not in the cards for me, that's okay too. I've often joked that the more I've dated, the more I loved my cats!

 

[kiltiesf]

I too am single and pretty much by choice. I'm in the final stages of regaining my financial bearings after the implosion of the financial industry and losing my job, so I've been focusing my energies in reinventing myself. But also having to come to the conclusion that while I'm not 25 anymore and vastly approaching 50, within the gay community makes me a less desirable mate, and I don't fit the often fantasized "hot daddy" type; I've the body of a twink, but not the associated age. While I have body image issues, I possess a healthy self esteem, and realize that I don't require another person to complete me. I have heard about and have witnessed friends who do nothing but complain about their mate and do nothing to improve their relationship or their lives, but would rather chew off a limb than to be stigmatized as being single; as if there is some negative connotation with being single. I would prefer being single and content, than in a relationship being miserable for the sake of being able to say that I'm a relationship.

I enjoy my own company. Having lived by myself most of my adult life, I enjoy the freedom to do as I please, when and how I please, without needing to check in. I am romantic, as well as a nurturer, and have been told that I'd make a great "wife" because of my domestic skills, but have found few men who understand that a relationship, like a garden, requires constant attention and maintenance. Also, I am one who wants to be courted, and not be rushed into the physical aspects of a relationship on the first, second or even third date. I want to get the know the man's heart and the head on his shoulders, which tell me who he is, and what he's about first, rather than the head in his pants, which tells me nothing about his character, but rather about how he was "gifted" in the gene pool.

So, if some day I'm blessed to meet him, fall in love, great! If that is not in the cards for me, that's okay too. I've often joked that the more I've dated, the more I loved my cats!

 

[psguy64]

kiltiesf

kiltiesf - well 'said' and can totally agree based upon my lifes' experiences.

I am a bit older but can echo similar perspectives. Have heard such comments
as you make a good husband, even a good wife... have been accused and
described as a serial monogamist which I had to google for meaning which
'drove' me to discuss with my therapist for real understanding. To date I
like my cherries garcia without guilt often, enjoy my home, like the company
of my cat and dog - all in a healthy manner with a smile on my face.

 

[JBJacker89]

i'm happy single.
If love came along i wouldn't spit in it's face, but i'm not going looking for it.

exactly!

 

[BenKwan]

After a couple of significant relationships followed by a 10yr marriage (which has ended), I think I'm headed down the single path for a while. Getting to this point was not about "looking for happiness" in my life, it really became about "eliminating unhappiness". Regarding the issues of social norms, other reasons for being single, and the life as a single person, I can relate a lot to what Exwhyzee, Dolfette and Spoon had to say. So, although I like relationships and the human interaction, I'm much much happier single and I needed to accept that.

 

[latin_cock]

I have now been single for almost three years and I as many others don't think I can find in someone new what I had in my last relationship. I hate how many of my friends question my decision to being single and try to set me up with multiple people. I think finding the right person should happen naturally and should not be forced. Having said that I don't think I am completely happy right now, I think I was the happiest I have ever been in my past relationship. Going into a new relationship scares me a little bit plus I haven't really been intimate with women in a while and I am not interested in being in a relationship with a guy. Life just seems too complicated at the moment ha

 

[ScorpioSlut]

I have now been single for almost three years and I as many others don't think I can find in someone new what I had in my last relationship. I hate how many of my friends question my decision to being single and try to set me up with multiple people. I think finding the right person should happen naturally and should not be forced.

I have to agree. I think that is the thing that bothers me the most about my friends and family. They act as if it is some sort of crime to not be in a relationship or at least not going out on dates every night until I find one. I feel that if I'm happy then they should be happy for me without questioning it, unless of course I am partaking in some sort of self-destructive behavior. The last time I checked being single is not self-destructive.

 

[D_Dick_S_Lapp]

I might have to revisit my answer from before lol. Two years of being single may have warped my view. I initially thought it was based on my own personal choice to try to better myself. Now though i'm starting to think that it was my overall personality clashing with others. AKA i had and have no choice other than to be single.

 

[D_Harry_Crax]

I've been single for more than 5 years. Like an unhappy married guy who doesn't want to stay married but also doesn't want to get divorced, I think the real truth is that I don't really feel like staying single the rest of my life, but I also don't really feel like being in another relationship either.

 

[424365]

I've always been single, never had a relationship for any length of time, and am a virgin. Ive come to the conclusion that its not in the cards whether I like it or not. I'm just that great "friend" to everyone.

 

[concupisys]

@bulldog: i wouldn't rule it out just yet as you are still quite young.... i hadn't even acknowledged my sexuality until i was your age, and it's taken almost a decade of meeting people and (very briefly) dating and learning about guys that i have come to the conclusion about my single-dom.... if i were you, i would wait just a few more years until coming to a more absolute conclusion about staying single.... you'd be quite amazed at how many others your age are in the same boat, and at 23 you're really just getting started in your adult life....

 

[424365]

Point taken.