Who here is like me and doesnt want to be married?

[houtx48]

The most high status people usually get married in their 20's. Those that are left over in their 30's are the unwanted mid to low status individuals and those who are 40 and still unmarried are quite often defective.

It is your choice to marry or not, but keep in mind the fact that if you're unmarried past a certain point in life, you will never find a partner worth having. You will find someone, but only someone low status or even defective.

Roflao..............oh really

 

[houtx48]

other than the 50% divorce rate, will the ones married in their 20's and then divorced fall under the category of unsuitable marriage pardners?

 

[Icarium]

Get married when and if you want to, being married doesn't stop many men & women from playing the field. The whole idea of marriage is to settle down with that one partner (unless you are swingers or have an open relationship) but even this is acceptable if you both agree to it.

I have a few friends who are in their mid forties never married and not wanting to, it has nothing to do with "finding the one" or playing the field, they just feel its not for them and they seem to be happy as they are.

Be who you are and do what you really want to do.........don't let society dictate.

 

[MsThang]

other than the 50% divorce rate, will the ones married in their 20's and then divorced fall under the category of unsuitable marriage pardners?

I fall into the married and divorced young category and really don't have a desire to remarry. Life is so uncomplicated when you just have to worry about your own happiness. But I do know that I would never be interested in anyone who uses such immature reasoning to find a mate, like wifey material, been around the block, low or high status, etc. Just shallow and have no real concept about marriage and they will be in for a surprise when they do get married.

 

[D_Humper E Bogart]

Could get a dog, I suppose.

 

[Luvhmlrg]

The most high status people usually get married in their 20's. Those that are left over in their 30's are the unwanted mid to low status individuals and those who are 40 and still unmarried are quite often defective.

It is your choice to marry or not, but keep in mind the fact that if you're unmarried past a certain point in life, you will never find a partner worth having. You will find someone, but only someone low status or even defective.

That is the stupidest thing I've read on this site!!

 

[petite]

I fall into the married and divorced young category and really don't have a desire to remarry. Life is so uncomplicated when you just have to worry about your own happiness. But I do know that I would never be interested in anyone who uses such immature reasoning to find a mate, like wifey material, been around the block, low or high status, etc. Just shallow and have no real concept about marriage and they will be in for a surprise when they do get married.

I agree with your comment about immature and shallow reasoning!

Ugh, speaking of people who are undesirable because they use reasoning like that, it's not so great being considered good "wifey material." For some reason, men have always seen me as the "marrying kind" and I haven't agreed with any of them about that before TheBF came along. You'd be astounded by how many marriage proposals I've had, but I don't think they were really seeing me, but their own personal checklist of desirable traits. There have been a few guys who pursued me who gave me the strong feeling that they had decided that they had reached a point in their lives when they were ready to get married and starting having kids, and I fit their personal "profile" of what they were seeking in a wife. I don't want a guy to marry me because he's decided he's "ready for marriage" and he thinks I'm good "wifey material" and now that he's found me, it's time to get started on those wedding plans and start popping out kids. I want someone to fall in love with me, not with how well I fit into his plans for his future.

I'm so not like you, though. I couldn't be alone for a long time and still be happy. I have always been a serial monogamist because I need someone to love and someone who loves me back. While I have been too cynical and too picky and too realistic to get married before, I am happier when I am paired up and monogamous. I've just had a slightly more sophisticated notion that a person should stay in a relationship for as long as both of you are happy and healthy for each other, and when it's time to end it, then you should do so as amicably as possible to preserve as many good memories as you can of one another and move on to the next part of your life.

 

[wallyj84]

in my opinion someone who is of "high status" is someone who is highly desired .. for example

a woman who is relatively young (mid to late 20's, early 30's), physically attractive, has a good job or is highly ambitious, not "slutty", caring, and an overall nice person, then she is of high status

now a woman who is like 40+, unattractive, doesnt have a job with no ambitions, been around the block a alot, not motherly, and an overall bad person, then she is of low status

and of course there are plenty of people in between

the same goes for men of course .. i think its a pretty simple concept

Exactly! When I talk about status and social worth, this is what I'm talking about.

 

[wallyj84]

This may be possible (though I do not agree) I am just cautious about using absolute terms. You stated earlier that "past a certain point in life, you will never find a partner worth having". Never? I may even be willing to argue that it could possibly be more difficult but, never? There is no way to prove or even quantify that.

You have a fair point. I shouldn't have said, "never."

Wrong. In the UK where we have a far longer history of ranking people according to their status, heterosexual high-worth individuals usually get married in their 30s when they have fully established themselves. Mid-status people probably more likely to pair up in their 20s and the lowest of the low partner, or at least breed, in their teens.

I think you need to learn to distinguish between "high status" and "popular in high school".

That's what I mean by status. Status is basically just how desirable you are.

other than the 50% divorce rate, will the ones married in their 20's and then divorced fall under the category of unsuitable marriage pardners?

I'm not saying that only people of high status get married in their 20's, just that people of high status are more likely to get married in their 20's. There are plenty of low status people who get married in their 20's and some high status people who get married in their 30's.

 

[petite]

Just for the sake of argument, I'll abide by your premise that "highly desirable" people are the high status people you're talking about. A person who is highly desirable and feels confident he/she will continue to be highly desirable into his/her 30s or 40s doesn't have to get married young. That person knows that sometime in the future, someone who is also highly desirable will want him/her, so that person doesn't need to fret about it or rush getting married.

Here's a weird phenomenon that I've noticed, and I wonder how it fits into your "high" and "low" status guidelines. All the people I know who live in small towns, they get married before the age of 25, and the people who live in big cities don't get married until they're over the age of 30. The people I know who live in big cities are better educated (or educated at more prestigious institutions) and make more money, too, so it would seem like that would violate your generalizations.

 

[wallyj84]

Just for the sake of argument, I'll abide by your premise that "highly desirable" people are the high status people you're talking about. A person who is highly desirable and feels confident he/she will continue to be highly desirable into his/her 30s or 40s doesn't have to get married young. That person knows that sometime in the future, someone who is also highly desirable will want him/her, so that person doesn't need to fret about it or rush getting married.

That person is being silly. Highly desirable people are in low supply and if this person decides to wait too long they will find only defective and low status partners, in their age group at least.

Here's a weird phenomenon that I've noticed, and I wonder how it fits into your "high" and "low" status guidelines. All the people I know who live in small towns, they get married before the age of 25, and the people who live in big cities don't get married until they're over the age of 30. The people I know who live in big cities are better educated (or educated at more prestigious institutions) and make more money, too, so it would seem like that would violate your generalizations.

Two things, culture and prestigious education and lots of money don't equal high status.

Big cities have a different culture than small towns, so it makes sense for people in cities to wait longer to get married. To be honest, I should say that people of high status generally have an easier time finding worthwhile marriage partners and thus usually get married earlier.

Also, education and money don't really determine your status. I have a degree from a prestigious university, but I'm as low status as they come. I have a decent paying job, but yet I'm low status.

 

[petite]

That person is being silly. Highly desirable people are in low supply and if this person decides to wait too long they will find only defective and low status partners, in their age group at least.

I don't see why the silly highly desirable people can't marry each other! What's the matter with someone who is highly desirable and knows he's going to be in 10 years marrying someone who is highly desirable and knows she's going to be in 10 years?

Does it really matter after all, since half the people I know who got married 10 years ago are divorced now. Those people are back in the dating pool again anyway.

Two things, culture and prestigious education and lots of money don't equal high status.

Big cities have a different culture than small towns, so it makes sense for people in cities to wait longer to get married. To be honest, I should say that people of high status generally have an easier time finding worthwhile marriage partners and thus usually get married earlier.

Also, education and money don't really determine your status. I have a degree from a prestigious university, but I'm as low status as they come. I have a decent paying job, but yet I'm low status.

Yes, I've definitely noticed the "marrying later" phenomenon in larger cities, and the people who are more desirable have an easier time finding mates, but you're assuming that they all want to get married as soon as possible, and a lot of people who are chased a lot want to experience the fun of being chased a lot for longer before they settle down.

You said attractive, nice, good people, who are highly desirable, and being all those things with a good education and a nice paycheck sounds like they would make most people's "checklist" to me. I'm trying to pay attention, but I thought I understood what you meant by "high status" and now I'm confused again. I would think that things like education and money would come into play according to your definition.

 

[wallyj84]

I don't see why the silly highly desirable people can't marry each other! What's the matter with someone who is highly desirable and knows he's going to be in 10 years marrying someone who is highly desirable and knows she's going to be in 10 years?

Because most likely there aren't going to be any other high status people there in ten years, or the few that are there will not be near them or interested in younger partners.

Does it really matter after all, since half the people I know who got married 10 years ago are divorced now. Those people are back in the dating pool again anyway.

People who are high status aren't going to get divorced.

Yes, I've definitely noticed the "marrying later" phenomenon in larger cities, and the people who are more desirable have an easier time finding mates, but you're assuming that they all want to get married as soon as possible, and a lot of people who are chased a lot want to experience the fun of being chased a lot for longer before they settle down.

That is a fair point. Having never been chased I didn't take that into consideration. But still, I don't think it affects things that much.

You said attractive, nice, good people, who are highly desirable, and being all those things with a good education and a nice paycheck sounds like they would make most people's "checklist" to me. I'm trying to pay attention, but I thought I understood what you meant by "high status" and now I'm confused again. I would think that things like education and money would come into play according to your definition.

Status, is about being superior. You can be wealthy and have gone to a good school and still be inferior.

To be high status you need a variety of traits, the two most important being mental and physical superiority. You should also have a personality that most in your culture deem as being good. After that, you should be the race that your culture deems superior. Those are the basic requirements to be high status. There are other things, but those are the most important.

 

[petite]

Because most likely there aren't going to be any other high status people there in ten years, or the few that are there will not be near them or interested in younger partners.

I thought I just explained why this isn't true.

People who are high status aren't going to get divorced.

What prevents high status people from having marital problems? What prevents them from having sexual issues? Or falling out of love?

Here's an example: Men who are more attractive are more likely to cheat on their spouses. It would seem like at least in that way, "high status" people would be at risk for getting divorced. The more desirable a person is, the more other people are trying to steal them for themselves, spouse poaching, and that leads to divorce.

That is a fair point. Having never been chased I didn't take that into consideration. But still, I don't think it affects things that much.

I think it affects things a lot. You haven't considered the personality of a person who is used to being treated like that and how that might affect the choices that they make.

Status, is about being superior. You can be wealthy and have gone to a good school and still be inferior.

To be high status you need a variety of traits, the two most important being mental and physical superiority. You should also have a personality that most in your culture deem as being good. After that, you should be the race that your culture deems superior. Those are the basic requirements to be high status. There are other things, but those are the most important.

TBH, what you described doesn't sound like what I've witnessed makes a person "highly desirable." My list would look different from yours, and that's the problem. While people may agree with generalities about "highly desirable" people, what makes people highly desirable to me are things like education, while you disagree with that, and that's where generalizing that some people are losers in life falls apart. Someone else might count "talent" as a highly desirable trait, such as artistic ability or musical talent, like someone who's in a cool band, or who would consider someone who's won the Man Booker Prize to be more desirable than someone who is "physically superior" in your opinion.

 

[wallyj84]

I thought I just explained why this isn't true.

And I disagreed with your explanation.

What prevents high status people from having marital problems? What prevents them from having sexual issues? Or falling out of love?

Here's an example: Men who are more attractive are more likely to cheat on their spouses. It would seem like at least in that way, "high status" people would be at risk for getting divorced. The more desirable a person is, the more other people are trying to steal them for themselves, spouse poaching, and that leads to divorce.

They won't have these problems because they're superior. They're better than normal people and won't succumb to the same problems as the rest of humanity.

I think it affects things a lot. You haven't considered the personality of a person who is used to being treated like that and how that might affect the choices that they make.

You have a fair point. But, high status individuals will have similar personalities, so I don't think it's that important. Remember, there is only one kind of personality that is good and the further away you get from that the lower your status becomes.

TBH, what you described doesn't sound like what I've witnessed makes a person "highly desirable." My list would look different from yours, and that's the problem. While people may agree with generalities about "highly desirable" people, what makes people highly desirable to me are things like education, while you disagree with that, and that's where generalizing that some people are losers in life falls apart. Someone else might count "talent" as a highly desirable trait, such as artistic ability or musical talent, like someone who's in a cool band, or who would consider someone who's won the Man Booker Prize to be more desirable than someone who is "physically superior" in your opinion.

???

Becoming a skilled musician requires physical and mental superiority, as does becoming a famous artist or highly educated.

I don't think that you get what I mean by a person being superior. A superior person and can do everything that an inferior person can do, only better. That is what it means to be superior. It means you are better than those around you.

 

[_Jonesy]

Simple answer here for me. Not interested in marriage, waiting for someone to make me change my mind

 

[petite]

They won't have these problems because they're superior. They're better than normal people and won't succumb to the same problems as the rest of humanity.

You have a fair point. But, high status individuals will have similar personalities, so I don't think it's that important. Remember, there is only one kind of personality that is good and the further away you get from that the lower your status becomes.

Becoming a skilled musician requires physical and mental superiority, as does becoming a famous artist or highly educated.

I don't think that you get what I mean by a person being superior. A superior person and can do everything that an inferior person can do, only better. That is what it means to be superior. It means you are better than those around you.

Oh, okay. A superior person is an imaginary person who doesn't exist, because no one has the time to be better at everything than an inferior person. It takes years and dedication to acquire many talents and do them well, and not a single person has ever existed who is more talented at everything than anyone else.

 

[wallyj84]

Oh, okay. A superior person is an imaginary person who doesn't exist, because no one has the time to be better at everything than an inferior person. It takes years and dedication to acquire many talents and do them well, and not a single person has ever existed who is more talented at everything than anyone else.

Let me rephrase that, they have the ability to be better than an inferior person at anything, assuming they put the same amount of time and effort into the activity as the inferior person.

I you took someone of high status and someone of low status and gave them both the same skill to learn, the high status person would learn it faster and better then the mid status individual.

 

[B_Hung Jon]

The most high status people usually get married in their 20's. Those that are left over in their 30's are the unwanted mid to low status individuals and those who are 40 and still unmarried are quite often defective.

It is your choice to marry or not, but keep in mind the fact that if you're unmarried past a certain point in life, you will never find a partner worth having. You will find someone, but only someone low status or even defective.

Good old "Wally84" and his theory about people being of high and low status. I can remember not so long along he chimed in on a similar thread. I think it would do Wally some good to get laid more...and not to worry about the other person's status. :biggrin1:

 

[wallyj84]

Good old "Wally84" and his theory about people being of high and low status. I can remember not so long along he chimed in on a similar thread. I think it would do Wally some good to get laid more...and not to worry about the other person's status. :biggrin1:

Maybe. I need to lose weight first. I'm way too obese for any kind of sexual activity.