Valued, you are. Yoda is my mentor and a mini version of him sits by every computer I have. :smile: Slack will be filled, should you go quiet - but let's hope that's a long ways away.
Why are we losing so many vauled members?
- Thread starter B_Nicodemous
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Valued, you are. Yoda is my mentor and a mini version of him sits by every computer I have. :smile: Slack will be filled, should you go quiet - but let's hope that's a long ways away.
*Sigh*
Please do not say that you are misunderstanding me as well, Hilaire...
Ok seeing as how I am obviously not being clear...
Ya know how mega-chains say "for our valued customers"? You know that they are not speaking about any one in particular, but all who walk through there doors. Thats what I am meaning. Of course everyone here is valued in there own way by a vast group of people. But some...
Ok I can see myself getting misquoted or being quoted out of context so i will try to make this as clear as possible.
With an analogy!
So i worked in retail. I worked in the Men's Dept and there were quite a few customers who came through. Some we only saw once and may or may not have bought anything. They may have exchanged some friendly conversation, and possibly brightend my day, and perhaps, those of my Men's coworkers. Some customers were regulars so we had long standing and deep relations with them. Some were like friends, some were friends. When they would leave and not return, sometimes I was the only one who noticed. Or maybe a few people in my dept, or a few scattered throughout the store. They were valued to those of us weho noticed on a deeper level than the once in a while, or once and that's it people.
Sometimes, they would be missed by those of us in Men's and no where else, though maybe Shoes, as these were the departments they frequented. But just becuase they were not regulars in the other departments, didn't mean that they were less valued to the store.
What has this to do with my thread?
Well you brought up a good point: we all contribute in different ways. Some of us on the forums. These can be broken down to Thread originators, posters, and veiwers. Some do this on multiple forums some frequent one or two. Then there are the people who are almost excluisively active in chat. They may frequent the forums once in a while, but chat is there main place. Then are the Bloggers. Some are exclusive bloggers who haven't made a single post, yet there contribution is very much valued. Others may exchange PM's and then move to private email, so some of us do not see them much.
So I was not meaning to degrade anyone here. I am sure some have left that i was never aware of, if only becuyase we were in different departments, to reference my analogy. Just as if I never went into chat again, the vast majority would neither notice or care, ubless the were forumites. And thats ok. :smile:
So there are people who hold, in each of our estimations, a more general value, and a more personal one. And we may even hold some in a middle ground: we love what they say, but do not interact much per say (the equivlent being a customer who smiles and is pleasant, but you don't really talk to {some we knew the names of the grandbabies of, dating, you name it},cuz you just hadn't gotten around ot it, or were shy or whatever)
So there may be a vast exodus happening at times and I am not aware of it simply because our paths hadn't crossed or not enough times for a friendship or admiration to set in.
Hope that clears it up.
I will answer your original OP using your retail analogy.
If LPSG is a store, what is it we offer? Porn? An outlet for sexual expression? A social network?
Depending on what the product is, that might help explain why or when the customer doesn't shop here any more. If the product is sexual expression, maybe this venue is no longer titillating for the user. If they have a social network, perhaps they network with their friends through sources off-site.
Hopefully we all grow and change, and as we do we might not interact with the LPSG product line the same way through time.
That said...I'm curious why people come and "shop" at LPSG...
I "shop" here for the same reason I shop at Radioshack. Mostly, I'm trying to kill time. I could probably find everything in a Radioshack somewhere else but since I'm there (usually in an airport or a mall) I figure, what the hell, might as well get a new wireless router while I'm here. Every now and then I'll run into an unusually helpful associate who answers my idiot questions and that warrants a return trip in the future.
It's the same for LPSG (though I don't surf this site while I'm at airports.) I could probably show off pictures of myself and look at porn somewhere else, but this is what I found, so I figured "why not?" In the short time I've been here I've run into some really nice people and have even spoken amicably with a few staff members. Reason enough to warrant return trips.
Neither has extreme, unwavering loyalty, but either could have it at some point in the future. I think that's why people come and go from sites like this; this isn't a necessity (in the food, water, shelter sense) and interest in the peripheral waxes and wanes.
JSZ
Sklar
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Actually, I think it comes down to three different reasons for members who have been here for awhile who leave or disappear:
1) real life rears its head again. No matter how much fun this place can be, real life obligations will always trump any website/forum.
2) the venomous nature of some people in the membership. I doin't think this really needs to be elaborated on.
3) after being here X amount of time, the same topics/discussions repeat themselves. How many "tenured" members really want to answer "when did they know they had a big cock?" For the umpteenth time. Eventually, this place DOES get boring and attention starts to go elsewhere.
Sklar
1) real life rears its head again. No matter how much fun this place can be, real life obligations will always trump any website/forum.
2) the venomous nature of some people in the membership. I doin't think this really needs to be elaborated on.
3) after being here X amount of time, the same topics/discussions repeat themselves. How many "tenured" members really want to answer "when did they know they had a big cock?" For the umpteenth time. Eventually, this place DOES get boring and attention starts to go elsewhere.
Sklar
- CUBE,
Valued members. Always an interesting concept. I have been here a spell. I will never be "valued" I guess because I don't have pictures up. No problemo, though I would be a notch more popular if I did. My work could never hang with an employee posting pics on the net. That is OK. It means, here, on this site, people only know me by my words. It can be interesting. I have seen some well known people move on from the site. They usually come in small groups and in a big flash of personality and pictures. I never get into who is fake and who is real. I just enjoy the site at face value. But a number of these people in small groups have been one person posing as two or more, faked pictures, lots of drama. Many are still here, to my mind, with new names. So valued members is kind of an interesting idea. The people I really enjoy here are positive on many levels. Some write the site off as just a porn site I do not. I look forward everyday to what people are saying and doing and sharing. Yes, I totally love the latest cock shot but I also love the knowledge of pop culture the men here have ready to share. I also really enjoy the site as a male bonding location. A site where straight guys and gay guys actually champion each other is like some freaked out fantasy world I long for I guess. All in all, this site had remained positive no matter who comes and leaves. I like the slight change up now and again as it keeps it fresh. So I will be here. I look forward to seeing the next valued member appear. Cheers brothers.
I understand the length of being a member and how it is equated to a "valued member". But I feel that some of those members, because of thier time, felt that differing views from newer members were not worthy and they would go on the attack. I'm not saying all just some, which I have personally experienced. Why they left I don't know but as for all things nothing stays the same if you want it to evolve.
New members can be valued members.
New members can be valued members.
Kotchanski
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In exactly 13 days, I will have been a member of this site for 5 years...
In that time, I've joined, quit twice, become a mod and stepped down, become a mod again, become an admin, and made this post!
I've seen countless members join, leave, come back, get banned and any combination of those. Some of the members were long standing members that everyone knew and loved, others had the most epic of post counts, others were relatively new but made a huge positive contribution.
I originally left after myself and one other member made similar posts of a very deep and personal nature, in different threads, and one particular member came wading in with very off-hand dismissive responses to both, followed by (at least in my case) a huge number of assholes thinking it was something they'd like to get off on via PM. I was hurt, disgusted and seriously pissed off... Had I not have left myself, I'd have crossed the line and been helped out the door by the mod team. Leaving that time, was self preservation!
I came back and was made a mod not long after, I stuck it out despite there being many of the same issues as before. I was a mod and had that there to stop me crossing the line and biting back, and I felt a duty to stick it out after the owner had been so kind as to give me a chance on the team.
I lasted a few years before a really bad combination of board politics and real life got too much. I stepped down as a mod, tried to stick it out as a member, but found I couldn't interact as a member, people couldn't let me just be me, all the grudges they held against the mods were being taken out on me. I left and didn't come back for around 6 months when I got an email from an old friend here asking me to return.
I don't recall if I started a thread the second time, but I do know I started one the first time... I wanted people to know what kind of sick fuckers they were sharing the site with, and the effects those people had on others. A warning of sorts to others who may thinking of sharing such personal events in their lives.
I don't know if that has answered any of your questions, I can't speak for why others come, go and come back again, but those where my reasons!
In that time, I've joined, quit twice, become a mod and stepped down, become a mod again, become an admin, and made this post!
I've seen countless members join, leave, come back, get banned and any combination of those. Some of the members were long standing members that everyone knew and loved, others had the most epic of post counts, others were relatively new but made a huge positive contribution.
I originally left after myself and one other member made similar posts of a very deep and personal nature, in different threads, and one particular member came wading in with very off-hand dismissive responses to both, followed by (at least in my case) a huge number of assholes thinking it was something they'd like to get off on via PM. I was hurt, disgusted and seriously pissed off... Had I not have left myself, I'd have crossed the line and been helped out the door by the mod team. Leaving that time, was self preservation!
I came back and was made a mod not long after, I stuck it out despite there being many of the same issues as before. I was a mod and had that there to stop me crossing the line and biting back, and I felt a duty to stick it out after the owner had been so kind as to give me a chance on the team.
I lasted a few years before a really bad combination of board politics and real life got too much. I stepped down as a mod, tried to stick it out as a member, but found I couldn't interact as a member, people couldn't let me just be me, all the grudges they held against the mods were being taken out on me. I left and didn't come back for around 6 months when I got an email from an old friend here asking me to return.
I don't recall if I started a thread the second time, but I do know I started one the first time... I wanted people to know what kind of sick fuckers they were sharing the site with, and the effects those people had on others. A warning of sorts to others who may thinking of sharing such personal events in their lives.
I don't know if that has answered any of your questions, I can't speak for why others come, go and come back again, but those where my reasons!
Thank you for all of your posts!
Petite.
Though i am in sporaditc communication with her so know the why (well as of a month or two ago). And please do not ask, as it was told in confidence. Even with her, and knowing the why, it is a shame not seeing her posts here or her blog. I miss that. The daily interaction, even if it was just reading what was going on. Also she is, in my mind, kind of the strat for those members whom I valued personally, leaving.
Anyone with any reading skills can figure out at least 2 of the others.
For those of you paying attention i really do not know know lika that well, we have exchanged a comparatively few back ond forth quips, and even though he was here before me, i honestly could not tell you how much longer as to me that is immaterial.
I like his posts and sense of humor. He is valued by me as one of those, to return to the retail analogy, happy customers who i would have a little convo with, and has a pleasant smile and likable personality, and you enjoyed seeing come into the store. To me time spent here does not, in and of itself make you valued. Nor epic posts, or time in chat, or funny quips. Any of those things or combo of them ina person may land them in "nico's valued members" catagory.
Maybe a new thread needs to be made? If it keeps coming up I think i might.
Hmmm a what constitutes vauled member to you? thread?
Thank you! I se it along that line myself! (hence the reason for the retail analogy!lol) As to why they "shop her" in the first place? That was answeredinyour reasoning to my q: it is kind of a one stop shop for a vast varuety of needs. That and the people are interesting.
*sigh* I will name one who I think most people will agree is sorely missed (well i mis her)Who in particular, be specific.
Petite.
Though i am in sporaditc communication with her so know the why (well as of a month or two ago). And please do not ask, as it was told in confidence. Even with her, and knowing the why, it is a shame not seeing her posts here or her blog. I miss that. The daily interaction, even if it was just reading what was going on. Also she is, in my mind, kind of the strat for those members whom I valued personally, leaving.
Anyone with any reading skills can figure out at least 2 of the others.
AWESOME answer! Thank you!
Another great perspective! I think these reasons have a lot to do with things.
Your silly my little panda:smile: I hope you stay around for a long while:kiss:They are only a few who have left never to come back.
Once you join this place, you are here to stay-or till you get a perma ban
For those of you paying attention i really do not know know lika that well, we have exchanged a comparatively few back ond forth quips, and even though he was here before me, i honestly could not tell you how much longer as to me that is immaterial.
I like his posts and sense of humor. He is valued by me as one of those, to return to the retail analogy, happy customers who i would have a little convo with, and has a pleasant smile and likable personality, and you enjoyed seeing come into the store. To me time spent here does not, in and of itself make you valued. Nor epic posts, or time in chat, or funny quips. Any of those things or combo of them ina person may land them in "nico's valued members" catagory.
You rock. :kiss: and though I don't know you, if this post is indicative of your other posts, i may well want to try. And for me a pic doesn't mean anything. Subgirrl had not one up before I came to the conclussion that she woukd be missed, by me at least, if she left. Same for petite and her 2 wrist pics that were all i had to visually go off of before becoming her friend. Her words were what drew me to her. Same with Max.
I have seen hostility form both sides. I hope you have read this post of mine and see where i satnd on the whle "length here and value" issue.
Maybe a new thread needs to be made? If it keeps coming up I think i might.
Hmmm a what constitutes vauled member to you? thread?
Thabk you for sharing! I wish more who have been here on and off and/or in different roles would post and share if they were so inclined. Thank you again:smile:
I second that.
So can I! LOL!
lol. MAybe i should adpot that attitude...:tongue:
Being vaueud and fitting inwith "the cool crowd" are not the same thing.
*gasp* I KNEW IT!
B_subgirrl
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Cube, you certainly don't have to have a pic up to be valued! Like Nico, I value people based on their words, not their pics. There are many people here that I care about who either don't, or didn't have pics up when I first got to know them. Nico, RawDog, Double_Digit (he might have had his cock pics up then - I don't remember), Petite (she had wrist pics) and Laidey are the first that come to mind. I've since seen pics of each of these people, but to be honest, I wouldn't have cared what they look like. I love them and value them for who they are.
You know what I don't get? I don't get the guys who PM or friend me without any posts. Why would I want to add them to my friend list when I don't know who they are? (sorry Nico, a bit off topic there)
It is most certainly words that make me fall in friend-love with people, not pics. If this site had pics and nothing else, I certainly wouldn't be here.
Me too!!! Petite has always been one of my favourite people here.
helgaleena
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I sometimes get exhausted by the flame wars and repetitive thread-topics on LPSG but I could never totally quit - my urge to look at dick-pics is just too strong!
But seriously, it's the flame wars that wear me out the most. Just like in a real war, seeing a friend or member you like get 'kiiled' by others makes you sad and angry as hell. You just turn your back on this place and take a break - sometimes permanent. I've only been here 3 years but I've noticed a pattern: members leave and come back all the time, but there seems to be a 'big' exodus when a well-known or well-liked member gets banned controversially and that member's friends/fans leave in disgust. Or even if the member doesn't get banned, but others feel that member or an issue/situation related to that member was handled badly. Sorry if that reads confusing - I sometimes over-complicate what I'm trying to say/write/explain.
But seriously, it's the flame wars that wear me out the most. Just like in a real war, seeing a friend or member you like get 'kiiled' by others makes you sad and angry as hell. You just turn your back on this place and take a break - sometimes permanent. I've only been here 3 years but I've noticed a pattern: members leave and come back all the time, but there seems to be a 'big' exodus when a well-known or well-liked member gets banned controversially and that member's friends/fans leave in disgust. Or even if the member doesn't get banned, but others feel that member or an issue/situation related to that member was handled badly. Sorry if that reads confusing - I sometimes over-complicate what I'm trying to say/write/explain.
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