Why do gay guys insist on using their full given name?

7

798686

Guest
I constantly shorten ppls names, my own included. Full names kinda seem a bit stuck up when I say them, altho I'm perfectly happy to stick to them, if people especially want me to.

Not sure why exactly - think it's a NW England trait, where working-class snobbery rulez. :p

And it's Joll H. Rothschild, just for the record.
 
7

798686

Guest
Exactly. Moms spend considerable time fretting over a name and for someone's buddy to all but change it in 5 seconds is annoying. My sister and I are anal about that with our kids.
One day her sons friend came to over to play video games and when she answered the door the kid asked if Bran was home. His name is Brandon.
She replied that there's no one named Bran there and shut the door on him.
Oh no! Precious?!


My mother was a stickler for insisting that no one shorted our names and would correct family or friends who done it in front of her.

I'm not a fan of having my name shortened but I'll call friends what ever they feel most comfortable with.
Is Dragz ok? :p

The first name that people know me by is actually my middle name. And almost every moderator can attest to the fact that I refuse to be called by the shortened version. The name that I use at SAG is actually the shortened version of my actual first name. Depends I guess. Although I will add that I have a friend name Candice and no one but no one would addresses her as Candy twice; and live to talk about it.
I'll call ya by your full name, if I get free rein in your pool and shower. :wink:
 
Last edited by a moderator:

B_Nicodemous

Experimental Member
Joined
Sep 24, 2010
Posts
4,366
Media
0
Likes
18
Points
73
Sexuality
No Response
ok ta answer the P: I am gay, and almost always go by my nickname. There was a brief spell in my early teens i insisted on being my full name, but really, that was it. I'm my nickname. If a person calls me my full name, that's fine. When I went by my iddle name i ALWAYS used the shortened version. I even embraced the shortened version of the middle name I used to despise, because the person saying it said it in a very nice way, well actually they made a huge joke of i, but in that way where I laughed instead of punched them, lol!

I tend to call people by some shortened form unless the request not to be called that. If I am in doubt I ask them.

I will lengthen a name if it is short ad cannot be rendered shorter Jill becomes Jillian) and shorten a name that is more than one syllable (Melinda became Mel, much to her frustration, lol though now it's on her outgoing message!)

I use the shortened version. I am also sloppy at home and have little fashion sense.
OMG! SO am I! :biggrin1:
The only Andrews I know (and there are 5) are all straight.....

At least I think they're straight! :eek:

And I know two gay Daves.

At least I think they're gay! :eek:

And I know a transexual guy named Alex. You didn't mention a transexual thing, but the other transexual I know doesn't shorten her name.
Well ya know me and I am gay...well mostly...lol
I know more straight guys using long versions of their name. I am as gay as they come and use the short version. So I don't know how you found this stereotype???
I notice it happens. Usually regionally.
I hate to say it but every gay guy I know does the long version. I wont name names but I have found it to be generally true.
Not true! You know me and you have always called me by my nickname. And as for my username...fuck EVERYONE calls me Nico (or Nic, or nicky, or nick)...including YOU:biggrin1: lol! :kiss:
A bit stereotyped there don't ya think?

It's not that gay men prefer to be called by their full names; it's that of the gay people you know/have met they prefer it that way.

As people have said, there are straight people who insist on their full names, and there are gay people who prefer shortened names (like me... if you say Joseph you sound like my mother.. I'm Joe ;))...

Preference of full name or shortened name is not related to sexuality ;)
^QFT:biggrin1:
Really? I know of people who are gay who use both forms of the above names and people who are straight who use both forms of the above and people who are bi who use both of the above in the cases of Michael/Mike/Mikey and Thomas/Tom/Tommy/Thom and Andrew/Andy. The only people named Drew I've known were named Drew to begin with, I've known 2 were hetero and 1 was gay. Geoffrey/Jeffrey/Geof/Jeff/Jeffie I have known versions of both in gay, straight and bi.
Only knew a few named Alex or Alexander and the 1 Alexander was straight, 1 Alex who is a woman and 1 Alex who is gay and 1 Alex who is straight. Never met an openly bisexual Alex of either gender.


Google Mike's Hair Salon, Mike's Hair Design, Mike's Hair Studio......
^also QFT
The first name that people know me by is actually my middle name. And almost every moderator can attest to the fact that I refuse to be called by the shortened version. The name that I use at SAG is actually the shortened version of my actual first name. Depends I guess. Although I will add that I have a friend name Candice and no one but no one would addresses her as Candy twice; and live to talk about it.
My bro in law's brother has the same middle as you and also uses it as a first and also refuses to be called by it's nickname version! lol Maybe it has to do with having that name as a middle and using it as a first!:eek:

I had a boss named Candace, but would get upset if ya called her anything BUT Candy lol She said if ya called her Candace she assumed you were mad at her (becuase that's what her parents did)
my first name is christopher, and that's the name i use because EVERYONE i know (gay OR straight) with the same name shortens it.... because i know so many people with the same name, i use the full version of it so as to distinguish myself from all the others.... i can't begin to tell you how many times i've heard someone say: "oh, chris blah blah blah" and then people are like: "which one?"

i've also been nicknamed things like 'clitopher', 'chrissy', 'kit', 'christophoro', 'topher', etc.... christopher is my given name, and that's the name i use....
See i would start calling you Christoph. I would have to not say your full name but not shorten it any of the previously mentioned ones. Or you would just be C.
Can't say I've noticed this, the majority of people I've met seem either to fall into the "hate it in full" or "hate it shortened" groups with no sexuality divide.

I fall into another group entirely. My full name is a shortened version of another name, and people continually insist on using the full version, even though it isn't my name. Very few people get away with lengthening my name a second time.
I am ok with either, my full given or my nick. I usually address myself by my nick though.

Ooo I would sooo piss ya off, as I would lengthen your name! And not only that i would lengthen it in a ridiculous fashion that would make no sense! lol Until ya asked me ta stop. then I would just use it when referencing you to friends:biggrin1:
Why the fuck do you care. I think your point is to promote the idea that gays are pretentious.
I say toaster instead of toasty, if that makes me pretentious, then .....
I think it becomes an issue when ya can tell it's forced. There is just a way where it comes off that way. If you are a full version person, fine. If you are that because your trying to impress me, your sad.
Yeah, it is. Maybe it bothers me because I'm gay and hate to be grouped into the same corral as the prissy gay men who need to have everyone call them by their full given name. I'm just not that uptight and a fan of formality.

I wonder if something inside you changes when you go from being Mikey to Mike then on to Michael. Is adopting a formal first name a way of distancing or separating yourself from people?
I get what you are saying, though as I said, iI don't care as long ad they are not doing it as a way of showing off. Some people just prefer their full names, and that's cool. You get a feel for pretentious people who are only doing so because it is "expected of them".
My name is Mark.

It can only be lengthened. One woman at work called my Markymark and one man called me Mistermark. Strangely, they got married!
Awesome!

Oh and i would call you Mr. Marcus:biggrin1:
associating this as a gay thing is bad enough, calling it prisy is even worse, yes people generally want to be called by there name. After all IT'S THERE NAME, how dare they. What is with people named John being called Jack or Margret being called Peg, explain that one please.
I see what you are saying as well. I think Earl has a problem with people overreacting when called a nick.

As for the nicks that make no sense obviously they had friends like me :tongue:
It is prissy when every single time someone calls them by their shortened name they make it a point to put down the other person and correct them. That's prissy.

"The name is Jonathan, not John, Johnny, or Jack. Use my correct name." And if you go ahead and call them by their shortened name again they get all bent out of shape as if it was some power game you are playing with them.

You seem pretty uptight. And BTW it's "their" name not "there". See how it feels to be corrected for something trivial? Pretty prissy of me huh?
Ok, if they said it like tha, yes i would get annoyed. If they said , "I go by blank" or "I prefer blah", then i have no issue.
"Professionals" and those that seek to show how 'adult' they are tend to be this way. I could care less if I'm called Syd or Sydney. That said, never type/write my name as Sidney or Sid. THAT bugs me because 1 letter isn't hard.
I will call you Dysney:wink::biggrin1:
You kind of are that uptight if you are irritated by how people address themselves. I've been called Danny, Dan or Daniel my whole life and thats not even my name - go figure that one.
oh you had relatives and friends like me! lol
an interesting point came up a few posts ago.... when i introduce myself to people, i will always do so with my full given name.... then 5 minutes later people are calling me by the shortened version.... like: did i not just give that person my name? i would have to say that it says a lot more about those who ignorantly shorten a person's name without asking than it is for anyone (gay or straight) to use the full version of their name.... like, if a guy was named william but introduced themselves as bill, then i would call them bill.... that's just showing a person respect.... to presume that someone is being prissy just for using the full version of their name (for whatever reason) is not only ridiculous but it's extremely ignorant....
Again it is the context. If you said, "i prefer Christopher" i would call you that. If you allowed a nickname i would call you that. If you were a good friend, I would deliberately call you my nickname for you until ya got irritated or capitulated.:wink: If ya did it, not because ya really preferred it, but because you were being a pretentious snob, i would give ya a ration of shit.


I constantly shorten ppls names, my own included. Full names kinda seem a bit stuck up when I say them, altho I'm perfectly happy to stick to them, if people especially want me to.

Not sure why exactly - think it's a NW England trait, where working-class snobbery rulez. :p

And it's Joll H. Rothschild, just for the record.
Hmm. need a nick for ya.. lol Actually i would be lazy and cal ya roth, or h.r. :biggrin1:
 

LaFemme

Mythical Member
Staff
Moderator
Verified
Gold
Platinum Gold
Joined
Aug 16, 2010
Posts
40,873
Media
2
Likes
38,885
Points
743
Location
Canada
Sexuality
90% Straight, 10% Gay
Gender
Female
I have an unusual first name. It is a family name with a lot of deep meaning; the shortened version is pretty common & meaningless. I used to correct people but don't anymore. At work, I answer the phone with my full name, I introduce myself with my full name, I sign with my full name, but will answer to the shortened version.

If you love me, you know what the full name means, but you have permission to call me what you like. :smile:
 

mehWHATEVER

Just Browsing
Joined
Oct 30, 2011
Posts
18
Media
0
Likes
0
Points
36
Sexuality
No Response
I'm gay, and my name is Thomas, and I usually go by, "Tom". I do, however, dislike "Tommy", unless you knew me when I was 5...
 

B_Nicodemous

Experimental Member
Joined
Sep 24, 2010
Posts
4,366
Media
0
Likes
18
Points
73
Sexuality
No Response
I have an unusual first name. It is a family name with a lot of deep meaning; the shortened version is pretty common & meaningless. I used to correct people but don't anymore. At work, I answer the phone with my full name, I introduce myself with my full name, I sign with my full name, but will answer to the shortened version.

If you love me, you know what the full name means, but you have permission to call me what you like. :smile:
I happen to know, and I do love ya, and thank ya for permission for the use of the shorter version! lol Though I must say the full version is just very pretty:smile:
 

aninnymouse

Cherished Member
Gold
Platinum Gold
Joined
Dec 13, 2006
Posts
2,812
Media
0
Likes
349
Points
553
Location
In My Own World
Sexuality
60% Gay, 40% Straight
Gender
Male
I go by my middle name, which I make sure to tell people when I meet them.

I also have a penchant for calling people what they prefer to be called, whether it's their full name, a given name, a nickname, or whatever. I think it's just respectful that way.
 

B_Nicodemous

Experimental Member
Joined
Sep 24, 2010
Posts
4,366
Media
0
Likes
18
Points
73
Sexuality
No Response
Again, I will call a person what they want to be called, unless they are a good friend and I want to needle them, or they are either a pompous ass or an ignorant jerk, in which case I go out of y way to fuck with them.

like this!
 

bobbyboyle

Just Browsing
Joined
Aug 31, 2010
Posts
245
Media
0
Likes
0
Points
51
Sexuality
50% Straight, 50% Gay
Gender
Male
"The name is Jonathan, not John, Johnny, or Jack. Use my correct name." And if you go ahead and call them by their shortened name again they get all bent out of shape as if it was some power game you are playing with them.
Look, Spud, if they've specifically made it clear to you how they like to be addressed (ie. by name) and you go ahead and call them something else, then you are being an arse. I'm sorry, Jimbo, but that should be pretty obvious to anyone with any social skills.

It ain't prissy, Polly.
 

B_Nicodemous

Experimental Member
Joined
Sep 24, 2010
Posts
4,366
Media
0
Likes
18
Points
73
Sexuality
No Response
Some people, who prefer to be called by their full name, have requested I call them something else. To be fair their names were not English, and my attempts to call them by proper prronunciation were painful. Yes I could have just Anglo'd the name, but I seriously can't do that.

It's a bit sad when they are begging me to just call them anything else!
 

B_subgirrl

Sexy Member
Joined
May 15, 2010
Posts
5,547
Media
0
Likes
33
Points
73
Location
NSW, Australia
Sexuality
99% Straight, 1% Gay
Gender
Female
I also have a penchant for calling people what they prefer to be called, whether it's their full name, a given name, a nickname, or whatever. I think it's just respectful that way.

This is where I stand on it. I call people by the name they used to introduce themselves, until such time as they request me to use another.

Unfortunately, that can backfire when I meet people outside of a RL environment. For instance, Nico will forever be Nico to me, despite him telling me his shortened-version real name early on.
 

earllogjam

Expert Member
Joined
Aug 15, 2006
Posts
4,917
Media
0
Likes
179
Points
193
Sexuality
No Response
Look, Spud, if they've specifically made it clear to you how they like to be addressed (ie. by name) and you go ahead and call them something else, then you are being an arse. I'm sorry, Jimbo, but that should be pretty obvious to anyone with any social skills.

It ain't prissy, Polly.

You're an ASSHOLE.:fu: