Why do I do it?

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by treeoflife, Mar 16, 2010.

  1. treeoflife

    treeoflife New Member

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    Hey guy's so I just wanted to hear some of your opinions on this. Ok so I don't know why I do it, but it seems that every relationship I get in I always end up breaking up with the person due to what I can only call my insecurities although I don't know exactly why. I always seem to think that my partner at the time could do better than me and therfore I break up with them, I always feel like I let them down or will let them down in the future even though there is no reason to feel this or no signs from them that that is what I am doing.

    I have trouble accepting compliments from people, like people saying "ah ur cute" or "you've a great personality" or "i like listening to you" or even "I love you." I have broken up with many women and 1 guy in the past because of this even though I had really really strong feeling for them.

    Guy's why do I do it? I really don't know and it is hurting me! I can't think of anything in the past that could be a trigger. I do come from a family with separated parents my dad and mom split when I was 6, I always had contact from him seeing him 2 day's every week and staying with him for 1 full weekend a month however we do not have the closet of relationships that i would like and I know that is both our faults. (we've never fought or what not though) so I am not sure if my "problem" could stem from this.

    Another thing I want to say is that I have no fear of commitment, I would love to meet someone and spend the rest of my life with them guy or girl. When I am not in a relationship I long for one but yet it seems when I am in one I get all these thoughts e.g why does he/she like me? they can do better than me! and I end up breaking up with the person.

    anyone got any advice for me? I'm lost and for the 1st time in my life I'm really starting to get depressed.
     
  2. nudeyorker

    Gold Member

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    I really wish I had a good answer for you but I don't. Your self-esteem issues are sabotaging any chance you have of having a healthy relationship. I think you need to start there and uncover the issues you have concerning your self image; that would be a good start.
     
  3. B_quietguy

    B_quietguy New Member

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    Sounds like a good question for a therapist. I don't know why people sabotage their relationships like this.
     
  4. green carnation

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    maybe you have a fear of failure and like to be in control as well, so you do the breaking up before they do. Maybe it is to save face. Whatever it is stop thinking you want to be in a relationship because you clearly dont and cant. Be by yourself for a while, sort it out and stop toying with other people good luck.
     
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