Why do some women go all crazy?

[Ethyl]

Women have a far more fragile balancing act when it comes to hormones than men. But let us not forget, that when men hit their mid year crisis it is usually because their testostorone which keeps them fit in lots of regards, has finally gotten low enough to make a difference in their lives, and they know it.

Not to nitpick but it's interesting you used the word "fragile" to describe a woman when referring to hormones. Are men also more fragile due to the hormone level drop in middle age? I never hear the word "fragile" used to describe them. "Crazy", "Wild", "immature", "reckless"? Yeah.

I'm no biologist, but I bet, that if there is a difference in the craziness between the sexes at this delicate time in life, it has alot to do with Menopause, with weight gain, with hypothyroidism, and of course with social norms too. In some respects, women have been allowed to go crazy, throughout history. If men do it, we go to jail. I think in the past, dildo's were actually used to treat female "hysteria" as they called it then.

That hysteria you describe has been used as an excuse to treat women in as the "weaker vessel" for ages. Women obviously can't make sound decisions due to their hormonal nature, right? I don't want to imply you espouse any of this Doc, don't get me wrong. What concerns me is that a normal biological rhythm is often viewed as something unnatural, when it's the most natural thing in the world. I don't think women are naturally predisposed to going bonkers because their hormonal cycles are more pronounced than men's cycles. As snoozan said, it's all dependent on a number of factors.

If someone grieves for another when a relationship ends or is ending, that's normal if there was much love there. Doesn't make anyone crazy, it makes them human.

 

[Principessa]

Women perpetrate as much domestic abuse in the UK as men. If you change it to domestic violence, then men are the bad guys, but only just.
We wouldn't hit you over the head with frying pans if you would just do as you are told. :smile::biggrin1:
There is some institutional sexism going on here. Whilst women are now "liberated", I still think that we have a cultural expectation that woman is the mother and holds the family unit together, and then by extension our communities. Some women are clearly fantastic at this, but then some aren't and suffer under the expectation, especially when they have their own problems, let alone everyone else's. That is true
Men aren't always that good at either understanding or helping :redface:, especially from the pub or golf course. There in lies the problem. Men do not know how to prioritize properly. If they didn't have female secretaries and assistants there business lives would fall to pieces. Wives are left to run the household even though they may have a full-time job already. Things need to be done around the home which the wife needs help with and where is the husband? At the damn Pub, golf course, tennis courts, playing paintball or at the go-cart park! And you wonder why some women go apeshit!
:biggrin1:

 

[Drifterwood]

Women perpetrate as much domestic abuse in the UK as men. If you change it to domestic violence, then men are the bad guys, but only just.
We wouldn't hit you over the head with frying pans if you would just do as you are told. :smile::biggrin1:

Things need to be done around the home which the wife needs help with and where is the husband? At the damn Pub, golf course, tennis courts, playing paintball or at the go-cart park! And you wonder why some women go apeshit!
:biggrin1:

Don't forget our mistresses :tongue:

Strangely, you are right about frying pans. Because men tend to have the physical advantage, women do use frying pans and irons even, when we are not looking. This is why you get the strange stat that more men are knocked unconscious by their spouses in the UK than the other way around.

BTW, I don't have any lumps on the back of my head. :smile:

Yet.

 

[Doc]

Not to nitpick but it's interesting you used the word "fragile" to describe a woman when referring to hormones. Are men also more fragile due to the hormone level drop in middle age? I never hear the word "fragile" used to describe them. "Crazy", "Wild", "immature", "reckless"? Yeah.

That hysteria you describe has been used as an excuse to treat women in as the "weaker vessel" for ages. Women obviously can't make sound decisions due to their hormonal nature, right? I don't want to imply you espouse any of this Doc, don't get me wrong. What concerns me is that a normal biological rhythm is often viewed as something unnatural, when it's the most natural thing in the world. I don't think women are naturally predisposed to going bonkers because their hormonal cycles are more pronounced than men's cycles. As snoozan said, it's all dependent on a number of factors.

If someone grieves for another when a relationship ends or is ending, that's normal if there was much love there. Doesn't make anyone crazy, it makes them human.

I think I mentioned fragile because lately with my Sis I've been getting a first hand view of how complex her personailty is, and how closely linked it is to her hormones.

Now I think we both know this is the same for men, but this is why I called it fragile. It is after all only a slight deviation of these hormones that can thow men or women off the deep end, and a personality as we know it will change for good.

Why do I pose the question that women might be more suseptible to this "craziness" we're talking about, well on the assumption that when we get older, they have a trickier balance to maintain on the hormonal level than men do. We all have the same hormones, but I'm guessing here, due to a woman's role in childbirth, the balance of her hormones have far more subtle gradients, and therefore deeper ramifications if they are off. Of course this is just an empty hypothesis, but it's still valid to explore.

As for the "hysteria" well that is just social indoctrination. Men from before the bible have always been looking to keep women in their place in some fashion or another. And even though we are much better today, I still believe alot of that baggage hangs around. This propensity to let women have a bit of excess in the madness department is one of the leftovers of Men looking at women as the weaker sex. Of course I certainly don't espouse this kind of view, but in the end like all men, I do wonder how much have I been influenced by it as I grew up. I guess that is why I posed the original question.

Your point on grieving is right on. I guess that kills that crazy argument over there. If we didn't grieve, what would we be? Perhaps this will lead to another argument, why don't men grieve in the same way as women. Or more interestingly, why don't men get crazy in the grieving process, when they should?

 

[MoonRiver]

I was mulling over this in my head last week, and believe that 90% of the time it's the male's fault.

I seriously believe the female inherently wants a cut-and-dry stable relationship in which to raise a child in—even if there is no child involved (a natural instinct).

Sans alcohol and drugs, I would side with the woman in a marital problem.

Sadly, as a male, I got bored sexually with my marriage.
What to do, yeah.
At least we had no kids.

 

[whatireallywant]

Remember, the vibrator was invented to treat "female hysteria" and "congestion of the genitalia". Maybe I'm an idealist, but I'd like to think an intense orgasm every day would help keep any woman sane. And if that's all it takes, I'll make the sacrifice. :biggrin1:

If it meant getting a daily orgasm I think a lot of women would fake "hysteria"... :biggrin1: (myself included...:biggrin1::biggrin1

 

[Not_Punny]

Yah, well, I believe that it's all chemical....

In addition to the hormone problems we suffer, I believe that we get a LOT of good and bad "chemicals" from relationships.

For example:

- When your s/o leaves dirty clothes on the floor (right next to the hamper), BAD chemicals are released in your brain.

- When you're trying to talk something over, and your loved one is callous about it, BAD chemicals get released.

- Flip side of the coin: when a loved one does a little something (flowers, backrub, compliment, little joke, brings you a tea or coffee, etc. etc.), GOOD chemicals are released in the brain.

- Sex is another source of the good chemicals.

I believe that "good chemicals" are things that humans NEED and actively SEEK.

And when a relationship dissolves into an excess of BAD chemicals, the human instinct is to either (a) scream about it (fight), (b) seek the "good" chemicals elsewhere (flirt, have affairs, etc.), or (c) dissolve the relationship in the hopes of finding a better source of "good chemicals".

- - - -

Anyway, I firmly believe that we are happy to the degree that we can (a) "medicate" our lives with GOOD relationship chemicals, and (b) not aggravate things by having our endocrine system out of control.

 

[Doc]

Yah, well, I believe that it's all chemical....

In addition to the hormone problems we suffer, I believe that we get a LOT of good and bad "chemicals" from relationships.

For example:

- When your s/o leaves dirty clothes on the floor (right next to the hamper), BAD chemicals are released in your brain.

- When you're trying to talk something over, and your loved one is callous about it, BAD chemicals get released.

- Flip side of the coin: when a loved one does a little something (flowers, backrub, compliment, little joke, brings you a tea or coffee, etc. etc.), GOOD chemicals are released in the brain.

- Sex is another source of the good chemicals.

I believe that "good chemicals" are things that humans NEED and actively SEEK.

And when a relationship dissolves into an excess of BAD chemicals, the human instinct is to either (a) scream about it (fight), (b) seek the "good" chemicals elsewhere (flirt, have affairs, etc.), or (c) dissolve the relationship in the hopes of finding a better source of "good chemicals".

- - - -

Anyway, I firmly believe that we are happy to the degree that we can (a) "medicate" our lives with GOOD relationship chemicals, and (b) not aggravate things by having our endocrine system out of control.

Well I have to say, I've never really thought of it that way. Maybe we are all a bunch of crack heads looking for the next fix.

 

[Doc]

Hell I would be happier being addicted to "good chemicals" then caffiene anyday.

 

[Not_Punny]

:biggrin1::biggrin1:I'm a crack whore, baby!

 

[No_Strings]

:biggrin1::biggrin1:I'm a crack whore, baby!

I'm a bit of a crack addict myself. :naughty:

 

[TheRob]

what about if the girl is just a friend and goes all crazy on you whenever you talk to her or whatever you say
does it mean she has the hots for you
I hope lol

 

[Principessa]

what about if the girl is just a friend and goes all crazy on you whenever you talk to her or whatever you say
does it mean she has the hots for you
I hope lol

If she does that when you are talking about other women then yes, I would say that she actually likes you, likes you.

 

[BigDuder]

we all go a little crazy sometimes

 

[Mackleanen Beebarf]

I'm a little late on the original question, but I really don't think many folks go crazy after they're married. They were crazy all along; they're partner just wasn't paying attention.

Unless you really rushed into it, there aren't many true surprises in a marriage. There may be a few things about the other person you didn't either want to see or admit before, but they were there to be observed nonetheless. There's just a natural tendency to downplay things you don't like about a person you're really into while you're dating, but once your living together day after day, those things are harder to ignore. If your gf showed signs of being overly clingy or your bf showed signs of being a hothead while you were dating, that isn't gonna suddenly change after you put rings on each other's fingers. Yet, afterward, when the guy feels crowded and the woman's sick of his temper, both think the other has "gone crazy."

 

[HazelGod]

He only does missionary and maybe doggy, he thinks foreplay is 5 minutes of sloppy wet kisses, and groping our breasts like a nerfball on a windy day. Then he proceeds to pound away like a jackrabbit for 5-8 minutes, cums, rolls over, then goes to sleep snoring loudly.

Ummm, and the problem with that is...? :biggrin1:

 

[Not_Punny]

The snoring part, HG.

 

[thebigO]

It may be marital expectations she was socialized upon - you know, the fairy-book wedding where a woman gets married to the prince on the white horse, provide for and take care of her forever, while all she has to do is keep house and squeezing out babies year after year. The fact that the poor woman doesn't take time to sit down and actually question such socialization probably doesn't help her much, either. I see this as more of a generational issue though. Most women in my age group (Gen Xers) haven't gone down the path that their grandparents did.

Or, it could be the stress she went through in breeding and raising children. Having known quite a few childed women in my life, most of them are the "nervous wreck" types, always having their kids around them 24/7 (I firmly believe that as human beings, one needs time away from other persons in order to grow properly as an individual), noisemakers, and so on. Just how can such a woman grow as an individual when she has to put the lives of her husband and children ahead of her own? She cannot.

Thankfully, my parents did not raise me into male dependency.

 

[B_Bette]

Having children is something that is expected of women. But lots of women should never have them. Bad mothers, bad fathers....once the kids come along, everyone is stressed out.

Thankfully, I'm kid-free. :smile: