Why do women always fuck up a fucking good lpsg friendship?

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by B_UNKNOWN321, Apr 1, 2007.

  1. B_UNKNOWN321

    B_UNKNOWN321 New Member

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    Are men capable of really deep friendships? Men are not known for the kind of deep emotional friendships that women have, but that doesn’t mean that they don’t want them and need them or sometimes attempt to have them. It is just the machismo gets in the way – for a guy to reveal the sort of intimate thoughts upon which real friendships are built is to admit vulnerability and open oneself for ridicule also so. Men do not deserve the image that women place upon them of having only interest in sex, drunkenness and violence. Hell we are much deeper than that – we love the libidinous luxuries of love making, the sensory stimulations of fine spirits and the rustic rigors of rough housing…ugh well I guess we do love sex, drunkenness and violence” but we also are seeking more but have no easy means of achieving it and save face with our strictly fun loving buddies.

    It is hard for a guy to develop any emotional depth and you women don’t help. We guys don’t often exhibit much emotional strength and rely on manly bravado to get us through life but you women just reinforce it – mollycoddling us and keeping your sole proprietorship on emotional strength in all relationships involving a man – mothers, sisters, wives, daughters all protect their menfolk from being the real tower of emotional support that I think we are capable of. And it takes emotional strength and confidence in showing it and maintaining manliness that is the basis of forming real man to man friendships.

    Friends developed on LPSG, surely not! I kid you not. What is very special about lpsg friendships as with other internet relationships is that we don’t depend on those initial visual clues to tell us whether this guy is worth getting to know. Age, machismo, race, whatever does not have to enter the equation so that reaction to verbal expressions can take precedence. And we guys can develop a form of companionship based strictly on talk and nothing more, no commitments, no embarrassment, nothing to hinder a real dialogue. If the talk is interesting and we meet our intellectual equivalent then we can reveal that we are indeed sensitive creatures inside that tough body and if lucky have a friend like one we probably would never meet in other settings. I have personally had some of the most wonderful friendships in my life with guys I have met on lpsg (AND almost all of them ruined by a woman’s interference).

    A very special friend I have on lpsg that I would never have otherwise. One guy in particular is the classiest guy I have ever met in person or out of person and whom I would classify as the sort of guy I would choose for my best friend ever, bar none. It took only exchange of one sentence in lpsg chat room private message and I knew I had met someone with enormous potential for friendship. And we have absolutely nothing in common that would be basis of a usual developing male-male friendship. He’s a bigger than life jock less than half my age, but with the intellectual connection, it did not matter. We have had the carefree and very enjoyable talks about our large dicks and pussies (not ours of course) and orgasms and ejaculations and special sexual skills we have developed (his much more so than me). These sex talks have been absolute nirvana to have that freedom of expression.

    We have also shared experiences of great joy in our lives and families but I have been inordinately impressed with the strength that this guy has extracted from sexual expression in every experience in life. I have always compressed my sexual urges into a small compartment to open only at discrete times and situations. This guy (let’s call him WF for wonderful friend) has opened that compartment fully. I now have no hang-ups whatsoever at thinking about fucking every gorgeous woman I meet. I won’t do it but I will not squelch that good sexual feeling that rises from the loins and causes swelling like I have never felt before and warms and enlivens the whole body with waves of supreme sensual and creative energy. Thank God for this guy – he is sensational and a four star friend.

    Has he gotten anything from friendship – of course. He of his own admission loves witty intellectual people and I am guilty on both counts (read some of my stories to get example of my outrageous ribald humor). Also I am about as good looking, have or am developing good physique so am not the former pathetic physical specimen (jocks I am sure are repulsed by sickly looking men and women) but most importantly I am embodiment of a guy who thinks like a sexual afficiando that he wants to believe he will maintain into later years. He is the sexiest man alive (nope he is not in Hollywood, he is lpsg and a thread will appear soon on that subject) and wants to stay that way, and he will. As for me I will share my secrets of being a sex god after 50 on another thread some day.

    So why with these good friendships would a woman want to destroy it? Several reasons, jealousy, resentment, incredulity that any two men could be friends other than bowling buddies, and suspicion that they or one of them is a pervert. These friendships always get fucked up by a girlfriend or wife who snoops around and discovers that her “man” is messaging another “man”. Women seem to think the only thing a man would want to discuss with another man on the internet is something sordid or salacious. My wife actually talked about suicide when I confessed that I had been talking to men (on a fictitious site, never lpsg!) – she was appalled that I could not discuss those matters with her but would choose some stranger. Not as shocked as I was that I would not want to discuss my smallish balls with her. Women just do not get it. They complain that men don’t act as if they have any feelings about anything or anyone and no social consciousness at all, but that is a fucking lie. We do but when we find a way to have a real mentally binding friendship as provided discretely by the internet they set out to destroy it.
     
  2. B_UNKNOWN321

    B_UNKNOWN321 New Member

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    Can a man protect his lpsg friendship when a woman enters the picture? Not easily. WF like others of his age that I have befriended have openly scoffed when I told them how my wife ruined by friendships on lpsg saying such things as “No woman is ever going to tell me whom I can communicate with and when, ever”. I would like to think that a huge man with huge ego and strength of a lion could actually put that self proclaimed pride and self assurance into practice and actually “win”. All that swagger unfortunately means nothing against the wiles of a woman to break up these friendships.

    What weaponry can a feminine little elfin sexy woman bring to bear against a huge brutish monster man? Young guys with their youthful ignorance have no idea how unlevel the playing field is when going up against a No. 1 live-in girlfriend or wife in these situations. Whereas a man uses logic, powerful sensible arguments and even muscular puffery to defend his friendship turf, women attack personality, character and core values to make their points. They are ruthless and men don’t take character assassination very well in an argument and if that dirty tactic doesn’t work, then women will bring out the cannons. They will threaten to tell all their girlfriends and your family that you are a creep and ruin your macho image in the community (another thing men will not survive). And if that fails they will threaten to take the children (if there are any) and never let you near them again. They usually always win without having to do any of these and they always mean business (you would never do any of these things). Are her methods effective weapons? THEY ARE LETHAL!

    So motlissof do you think your friendship with WF is imperiled? Yes, lately our friendship has with a new much closer WF/gf relationship taken on all the earmarks of a woman trying to destroy it. Messages almost are never returned, and what does pass for a message is some tepid reply like brothers talking to each other. He has erased his profile on lpsg (sure sign of fear she will see the profile in lpsg as trolling for a weird relationship) and does not even mention a nice card I sent to a beloved relative (totally unlike this very sensitive man). If he has faced the barrage of weaponry that woman bring to bear to erase a male-male friendship, can I blame him for taking whatever defensive posture he can and try to save his relationship with his family and hide his friend in the process or just dump him. More positive outlook below.

    Women wise up and stop fucking with a man’s life! Women – men are not always looking for sex with children or searching for an affair with another woman when they communicate on the internet, sometimes there are matters such as his dick or balls that quite frankly you wouldn’t give a damn about that he wants to discuss with someone. It is important to us guys to be able to talk about things that are very personal to us as a man and you women just fuck it up when you hear about us having a special conversation with another man who will listen and laugh and lament with us. Women as well intentioned as you are, let us have our man to man friendships in about the only place we can have them, in anonymous chat rooms and instant messages. We might even learn something that could add a new dimension to our sexual weaponry to please you or rejuvenate our sexual appeal to you. Don’t fuck up these relationships.

    And special friend out there. I am quite comfortable in telling you that I love you and do not want to interfere with your family happiness but I cannot put aside my deep personal feelings for you. You are a literary genius and when you can carve out the time, you will be acknowledged for the very gifted writer you are and I would like to be there to buy your first 100 copies. I have been devoted reader of New Yorker Magazine for 30 years and it is known as accepting only the best writers in the world. None has any greater ability in painting word pictures (especially of a man and woman in sexual ecstasy) nor greater linguistic facility and command of the language than you do. God help me after reading some of your sexual descriptions, I have to get out the Heads On and apply directly to my cockhead, it hurts so much from the vascular tension. I would like to see you develop that God-given talent into a second career as a very successful writer. If I am wrong in assessing an effort to undo our friendship, thank God – perhaps you are just too pressed for time with all your commitments for much chatting right now. I just want to reiterate that this friendship is one that is as sacred a relationship as any I have ever made. You are an incredible and joy sustaining part of me (the rest of you out there can retch if you want to, but I trust you have or will someday have such a friendship with another man).

    AND lpsg women – none of the critique of fucking up women applies to any of you. You are super women and the kind that would allow a man to have the kind of deep fellowship with other men that they seek but seldom ever allowed to have. And if any of you men attempts to develop a friendship with either of you having a serious girlfriend or wife, be very, very careful.
     
  3. naughty

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    Wow M!

    I am so sorry you feel your friendship was ruined by your wife's insecurities. Unfortunately with all of the stories about Internet infidelity and cyber predators people have become hypervigilant. Have you considered counselling? Perhaps the two of you should go to counselling to see what is the source of her violent reaction. I am not married but I have seen quite a few people who wrongly assume that their mate should be their all in all and if not something is wrong. Guys need guy time. I dont want to hang out with the guys during a bonding session. I do hope you can repair your friendship and sort things out with your wife as well. Try not to get a stroke over this in the process....
     
  4. SpoiledPrincess

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    We've heard your side of it but not your wife's, but your admission My wife actually talked about suicide when I confessed that I had been talking to men tells us that she must have felt very betrayed, when people aren't upfront about friendships of course some wives will feel threatened - you're having a friendship she doesn't know anything about, she doesn't know if you're romantically involved with someone, what she does know is that you felt fit to keep it secret up to that point and probably feels that you only admitted it because it had become 'serious' in some way. It's on the tv all the time partners leaving partners for people they met on the net, if she's insecure of course she's going to feel frightened, and to be honest you don't seem to be doing much to make her feel secure in your relationship, you tell her there are things you can't discuss with her, and women aren't actually the silly illogical creatures we're so often accused of being, the fact that both your wife and WF's gf kicked up a fuss about this friendship clearly shows they both felt threatened by it and are both probably the people who know you best in the world, both of them behaving in this way can't be a coincidence . You deceived her by using the net behind her back, and the only reason you would have used it behind her back is that you know she wouldn't have approved. Guys need male friends, women need guys who are honest with them.

    Men do not deserve the image that women place upon them of having only interest in sex, drunkenness and violence. I'm afraid you qualified for another accusation women often level at men, that of being deceptive.

    If this reply comes off as hostile I don't mean it that way, I picked a few remarks from your longish post to try and put how she might feel. Maybe if you'd been upfront at the beginning she would have been cooler with it, my ex husband chatted online and I didn't have any problems with it, if I'd found out he'd been doing it secretly damn right I'd have been pissed off.
     
  5. Ed69

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    First off This is Ed69 Wife Sassylisa, I seem to have a little trouble logging in and since I don't come here very often I am really not suprised. But Ed showed me this thread and I must say something so here it goes.

    My dearest sympathies go out to you Motlissof on your situation. As I am a wife and do not understand why wives and GF get so uptight when their men want to have a meaningful realtionship with other men. I thought that this site was for men to share with other men and the fact that you have let us women in to put our thoughts in is really great. I get very fustrated when I see a wife or a GF come into a group of guys just to embarrass her spouse or BF out of the group because she is uncomfortable with sharing him with others. I see it all the time in real life and now to read that it happens in cyber space is truelly sad. It tells me that there is no place were a man can be himself.

    Women quit being so judgemental of your man. Men need to have the opportunity to talk with other men without women persecuting them for it. I am not perfect I have my own faults and down falls but I am doing what I can to change that.

    Please read this thread without a judgemental heart and take it as important information that needs to be taken seriously.

    THANK YOU
    LISA AKA sassyLisa
    Ed69 Wife
     
  6. B_NineInchCock_160IQ

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    I wasn't able to relate to any of this. I think you're being far too general. Not all women are going to want to fuck up any relationship their man has with another man. That seems strange to me, too. Did she have some reason to believe that this relationship was anything more than just friendship?
     
  7. LeeEJ

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    Of course, women aren't immune from being accused as deceptive, either.
     
  8. SoFla8

    SoFla8 New Member

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    It's only snooping because you didn't tell them from the beginning. I'm no relationship expert, but being honest and up-front (about everything) is the keystone that keeps it all together. You found it convienient not to mention this relationship and she, understandably, felt betrayed and lied to.

    You made this bed and now you hafta sleep in it.
     
  9. Wrat

    Wrat New Member

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    As mentioned above, in the middle, between the eas
    My ex was jealous of my friendships as well. Her insecurities, her lack of control over herself and her anger and her need to control my life in every way were greater than her love or her respect for me and the person I am. She too threatoned suicide and, from what I can tell, for no particular reason except to control her environment. That kind of drastic measure usually works, if only temporarily, and spawns resentment. Our relationship fell from it's own weight. She could not deal with the fact that I am a friendly person who enjoys talking to other people.

    She has a few friends too, but you have to jump through so many hoops and fit into such a narrow catagory to be one of them that it is hardly worth it. She was actually closer to her friends than she was to me. The "rule of no friends" obviously didn't apply to her.

    That's the way it is. Sorry to hear about your life. Good luck.
     
  10. Ethyl

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    I'm not in an exclusive relationship but if I were, my SO would understand right away that I frequent several sites, including this one, and that I have male and female friends I stay in touch with via IM. If they couldn't handle that knowledge, then our relationship wouldn't last. In turn, I wouldn't expect my SO to give up his friendships or internet activities.
     
  11. B_UNKNOWN321

    B_UNKNOWN321 New Member

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    My situation with my wonderful friend is not quite as grim as I suspected. I know still there is a woman working behind the scenes to root out this friendship, but we talked at great length today just like always. It just takes development of new chatting skills when an interfering woman starts pressuring a man to stop chatting to a man on the internet.
     
  12. blacktightfit

    blacktightfit New Member

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    I am thinking the same thing you are. This doesn't sound like guys developing a platonic relationship. It appears she is thinking it is a more sexual relationship.

     
  13. B_ScaredLittleBoy

    B_ScaredLittleBoy New Member

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    Well obviously its your wife's fault! You only lied to her, and I don't know what was going on but she obviously thought you were more intimate with this other guy. And it seems like you care a lot more about this "friend" than your wife which is a bit sad.

    Are you sure you're not gay/bi? And I'd say it was entirely your fault.

    My ex's have all known about my presence here and the few (few) people I occasionally/rarely PM/chat with. None were all that taken aback or concerned by it. These are people miles away, all I read are their words and I don't or rarely see pictures of them. I don't think you should put so much stock in 'LPSG' or internet friendships motlissof. When it sounds like you're neglecting your wife or just don't like her very much. Maybe you should move in with your friend?
     
  14. B_UNKNOWN321

    B_UNKNOWN321 New Member

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    It was suggested to me in a private message that perhaps we guys could discuss the special needs we have in soliciting chats and idea exchange in lpsg with our female partners. Perhaps if this happens early in the relationship then the vented hurt from her would be less traumatic but I think it will be serious nonetheless. I feel that women make a deeper emotional commitment to their friends and loved ones than men typically do and consequently are more threatened when one of those relationships which that she may think is an inviolate one is competitively challenged. Basically I suppose men are supposed to be big macho, gruff, steely warriors, and certainly not in need of a male to confide any personal information with. WRONG -- perhaps when men can proudly possess both attributes, very male but with a decided sensitive side, we won't have to slip around to talk to the guys about very, very guy stuff, so private in fact that we could never tell it face to face.
     
  15. naughty

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    Please,

    When you are discussing your woman use the singular form. We as women are not monolithic. As you can see there are many women on this board who would not mind you talking to your friend online. Unfortunately it seems you and your wife have some serious trust issues that are bleeding over into your friendship online. I hope you two get it worked out.













     
  16. IrishGirl

    IrishGirl New Member

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    I'm going to be really really honest with you.

    For the record (so you don't make any false assumptions), I am a middle-age female in a sexually, physically and emotionally healthy relationship. We have mutual friends as well as our own individual friends. Neither one of us is the jealous type.

    You are in love with this guy. Not the "I love my friends" kind of love, but touched my soul in love kind of love. Romantic love. You are lying to yourself by trying to paint it as anything else.

    You aren't just having some guy talk with him. You are investing an incredible amount of emotional energy into him. You speak of him in terms that most people would describe their new lover in. You are turned on by him. Your choice of words in describing him go far beyond friendly admiration or appreciation.

    You crossed that "friendship" line with this guy a long time ago. You know it ... and so does your wife.
     
  17. jack99821

    jack99821 Member

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    IrishGirl is so right here. Frankly I don't think you're involved sexually, but it's clear that there's an emotional affair of sorts going on between you and "WF". The first thing that came to mind when you named him that was the lyrical poetic feel of "wonderful friend" versus the more obvious "best friend" or even just "my friend". I've had deep guy-to-guy friendships, and I for one have never felt it necessary to describe the dude in embellished terms that sound like they were written by one of the Brontë sisters.

    Obviously I'm only seeing one side of the story (yours, rather than WF's or your wife's or even his girlfriend's), but this seems for all the world like an emotional affair, however one-sided it may be (and I suspect it is). Emotional affairs are much more dangerous than sexual affairs. Everyone feels lust, even when they are in love with their SO, but *not* everyone feels love to an outside party. I've only been around for 20 years, so I'm not entirely positive on this, but I think it's pretty damned rare to be in love with two people at once.

    Your wife has reason to be upset.
    WF has reason to be upset (if the relationship is one-sided).
    WF's girlfriend, however, has no reason to be upset, so far as I can tell. Is WF perhaps getting creeped out, and it isn't his GF who's making him chat less? There are some things in your original post that sound almost obsessive. In particular, your touting of him as the best thing since Shakespeare.

    -Jack
     
  18. Principessa

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    BINGO! IrishGirl & Jack are spot on!

     
  19. B_cigarbabe

    B_cigarbabe New Member

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    Like everyone else has said,you should have been honest, with her from the beginning.And perhaps it's falling apart from that.Plus it sounds like your in love with this "WF", so why would'nt she be upset?
    Irishgirl and jack were dead on the money!
    I hope you can undo the damage you've done.
    Best wishes to you three.
    cigarbabe:saevil:
     
  20. B_UNKNOWN321

    B_UNKNOWN321 New Member

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    Many private messages indicated that I left the wrong impression on this thread. I was not seeking solace for my man/woman conflict in my family. That is a lost cause. My wife was insanely jealous when I married her so was not suprised the way she reacted to my internet friendships. She won't let me out of her sight for 5 minutes without getting panicky so that is a problem I have learned to deal with for many years. My intention was focus attention on the WHOLE problem of women not trusting that two men can be talking in very friendly terms who have seen each other and it not be some form of perversion. We men with big dicks have a feature in common that is certainly as valid a potential male/male bonding topic as interest in collegiate basketball finals. But where in the bloody hell do women think two men are going to feel comfortable talking about their dicks, where in the bloody hell!!

    Also another point was that no matter how loudly a big burly guy doth protest that a woman would never interfere with his internet friendships, that quite simply is bullshit. Almost no man is up to the challenge of the emotional battle of defending that kind of friendship, if in the boxing ring, yes, but battle of gut level insults and tears, NO WAY!! The guy I gave as example is barely able to communicate with me now and never uses any names, and gives responses to internet activity in the most vague and meaningless words (just as I did when "found out"). I love this guy deeply and would do anything for him and very much resent the intrusion and ENCROACHMENT of a woman on this wonderful friendship.

    Just beward friendships on lpsg if either of you is approaching a serious relationship with a woman -- the male male friendship no matter how strong will shredded if you are not a master of stealth.

    Thanks for all the advice guys and gals about mending my personal male/female relationship. Women when facing a serious relationship with a man just are absolutely not of the persuasion that you think they are capable of becoming. All the stories of pederasty and child molestation mediated by internet has probably been in large measure responsible for their overreaction to a husband or boyfriend having a dick-centered friendship with another guy.
     
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