Growing up in a small town in the south, it was difficult. I knew I liked guys. Love to watch TV and watch Michael Landon and Adam 12, Emergency and just loved looking at the guys. I never put 2 and 2 together that I might be bi or gay. I was awful at sports and was always the last person to be picked for any sports. I was an only child and my dad worked all the time so I was with my mom and grandmother most of the time. I didn't have any cousins near me so I would just watch TV and play by myself. I really didn't know how to relate to others either and my dad never threw a ball with me, or anything. He did teach me to ride a bike though. He would work 6 days a week from 5am in the morning to about 8 at night. He owned a grocery store so he had to be there all the time. I would help him stock shelves etc but any kind of sports I never did. I found out I could play the piano by ear when I started picking pieces I had heard on TV after church. I then started taking piano lessons. In High school, I played for the choir and was in Band. Because I was really into music and was terrible at sports I was called lots of names etc. Even though I didn't act on it, except later in liefe in college, I was still the school Fag. I was small build, bright red hair, freckels, etc. I found something I was good at - Music, and became a music teacher - piano major. I have a Masters Degree in Piano Performance. One time I had a boy call my house and ask me questions and he recorded it. His mother was a social worker and she showed up my at house to talk to my parents about me being a fag. They took me to a psychologist and he said I was normal, wrote a report and sent it to the school and nothing else was ever said about it. This was my life growing up. I still cant figure out if the reason I liked guys was that I wanted to be accepted by them so I would do things to please them. or if I really was gay or bi and that all I went thought formed me into a bi man. I am married with kids and Love my wife and kids so much. This was back in the 70's when all this happened to me. I also LOVE to cook, and am very good at it but I know a lot of men who are great cooks. What do you all think of my life experiences. It was really hard on me emotionally and I still feel the scars from it even though I am 51 years old. I never though of suicide because my mom loved me so much I know it would have killed her. I am a teacher and when I see kids bullying other kids, I get so angry about it. My son had learning disabilities and was bullied in school by his teachers by refusing to help him do his work and refused to follow the IEP plan set up for him . He started cutting himself, and I stepped in and put a stop to it. The school district lost all their state funding for their Special Education and the two teachers lost their jobs. Sorry to vent.