why do YOU masturbate?

B_Bette

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I'd rather masturbate than deal with the great unpredictability that comes with casual sex. Chances are, the dude has a small dick, lasts 5 minutes and might be hiding some dreadful STD.
 

Jentl

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When I was 16 I started masturbating every night in bed; ever since I need it to go to sleep... Next to that, I really got into cybersex on gay.com; it's easy, you can fantasise all you want, I can take as long as I want.
I know it's not supposed to be that way, but real sex with my boyfriend always ends really fast; his aim is cumming, not prolonging the pleasure.
Often, I'll suck him long and deep, to let him feel how good orgasms can get if you take a while and build up. But with fucking he's just too stimulated.
Anyway, he cums quite fast, and I'm stuck with my habit of taking my time and building up. Two possible outcomes; I cum too (he jerks me off while fucking me, or I do it myself, or I jerk myself while sucking him (which really really turns me on)) but that orgasm is hardly ever as good as after a full (up to) 3 hours of jerking of in cyberspace. So option two, I don't cum and stay horny for the rest of the day because I got to suck his dick, and do it again later, then cumming.
So masturbation; pure fun, and sadly, better orgasms than in sex.
 

diego

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Cause masturbation is good, that is the answer, a good and simple answer. When i am stressed or with nothight better to do either i jack off 2-3 times. But in my early teens at that faditic day when my father bought sex channel from his cable tv, man i was alone all day, i must had jacked of 9-10 times. My dick had been hurting for 3 days.
 

dudepiston

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This actually surprised me, Arnod...your mentioning that your orgasms are better & deeper from masturbation than regular sex with your BF. I certainly understand. I mean, there's a psychological reason to masturbate, as well as have sex with someone else. Masturbation is just more selfish, but not in a bad way. But it's a fact, you only have to worry about YOUR pleasure and, you can completely, 100% control the build-up phase, and then plateau, and then keep yourself there indefinitely. It's amazing, and of course the more you build the better the explosion. I think most people can come harder & deeper from self-pleasure, IF they really are in-tune with their bodies.....and don't see masturbation as just a 'release that must be done...'



Arnod_PM said:
When I was 16 I started masturbating every night in bed; ever since I need it to go to sleep... Next to that, I really got into cybersex on gay.com; it's easy, you can fantasise all you want, I can take as long as I want.
I know it's not supposed to be that way, but real sex with my boyfriend always ends really fast; his aim is cumming, not prolonging the pleasure.
Often, I'll suck him long and deep, to let him feel how good orgasms can get if you take a while and build up. But with fucking he's just too stimulated.
Anyway, he cums quite fast, and I'm stuck with my habit of taking my time and building up. Two possible outcomes; I cum too (he jerks me off while fucking me, or I do it myself, or I jerk myself while sucking him (which really really turns me on)) but that orgasm is hardly ever as good as after a full (up to) 3 hours of jerking of in cyberspace. So option two, I don't cum and stay horny for the rest of the day because I got to suck his dick, and do it again later, then cumming.
So masturbation; pure fun, and sadly, better orgasms than in sex.
 

Jentl

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dudepiston said:
This actually surprised me, Arnod...your mentioning that your orgasms are better & deeper from masturbation than regular sex with your BF. I certainly understand. I mean, there's a psychological reason to masturbate, as well as have sex with someone else. Masturbation is just more selfish, but not in a bad way. But it's a fact, you only have to worry about YOUR pleasure and, you can completely, 100% control the build-up phase, and then plateau, and then keep yourself there indefinitely. It's amazing, and of course the more you build the better the explosion. I think most people can come harder & deeper from self-pleasure, IF they really are in-tune with their bodies.....and don't see masturbation as just a 'release that must be done...'
So... was this good or bad :)

Let me put it another - maybe more positive - way.
When I have sex with my boyfriend, it really really turns me on. When I'm sucking him; it's heaven. But half of it is happening in my head (mostly I fit what I'm doing in a rougher scene, like I'm forced to suck him - he knows this, and sometime does roughen it up a bit to help out) but I don't like jerking off so much while I'm doing it, cause that would ruin the fantasy. So sucking cock only gets me off in my head.
Same thing when he's fucking me... well... ok, when the fucking gets hard, it sometimes gets me so horny I cum without even touching myself. Those are really really good orgasms, I know that, but still, I'm surrendering completely, but he doesn't always realise I'm gonna cum so I end up having an 80% orgasm - òr a painful 130% when he keeps jamming my button. (But I can live with that :)
By now of course, he knows I'm not that keen on jerking off while having sex, I just really really wanna pleasure him, and the way I'm feeling while doing all those things is just as good as cumming. Other times, he will jerk me off while he's fucking me; (and of course cumming while getting fucked always feels really strong).
Concluding; real sex gives me more anal pleasure (and pleasurable pain) (but I can self-induce that too) and there is nothing like getting some real cock in my mouth and ass.
But the really really really good orgasms, built up and synchronised with my own feelings, I get from masturbating.
That doesn't mean I could ever do without the real thing.
Was this reply more clarifying? Or just as bad? :biggrin1:

(I know I'm a bit screwed up... that's part of the reason I'm here... it's not always fun to be me)
 

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COLJohn said:
And who says there are no romantics left? Bette, is it safe to assume that you have had your share of bad hook-ups?

Good and bad. Haven't we all? Still, it's not satisfying for a woman to throw herself around like a slut. Any woman who comes at you with all of the "Oh I have free sex, free love, I do it cos I want to" is lying. She's also lying about the fact that it feels good after. Feminism was supposed to liberate women. Instead, we bought into the bs and degraded ourselves. I'm no Ann Coulter, but it doesn't take a genius to figure out that if you truly value yourself as a person, male or female, you just don't give yourself away like that.

Why would I risk my personal safety, health and well-being just to get some?? I know how to masturbate and rent porn until I find someone I feel is worthy.
 

D_Sheffield Thongbynder

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Bette said:
Good and bad. Haven't we all? Still, it's not satisfying for a woman to throw herself around like a slut. Any woman who comes at you with all of the "Oh I have free sex, free love, I do it cos I want to" is lying. She's also lying about the fact that it feels good after. Feminism was supposed to liberate women. Instead, we bought into the bs and degraded ourselves. I'm no Ann Coulter,[thank God for that, Bette] but it doesn't take a genius to figure out that if you truly value yourself as a person, male or female, you just don't give yourself away like that.

Why would I risk my personal safety, health and well-being just to get some?? I know how to masturbate and rent porn until I find someone I feel is worthy.

I like your self-assuredness, Bette. My gf, BTW, agrees with you 100%. This isn't meant to be a woman's issues thread, but she is a feminist of sorts and doesn't condone women using promsicuity to make a statement (unless the woman actually enjoys the promiscuity, which is fine).
 

B_Bette

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COLJohn said:
I like your self-assuredness, Bette.

Thank you, I appreciate the compliment.

My gf, BTW, agrees with you 100%. This isn't meant to be a woman's issues thread, but she is a feminist of sorts and doesn't condone women using promsicuity to make a statement (unless the woman actually enjoys the promiscuity, which is fine).

I used to call myself a feminist but frankly, it's embarrassing. In my own way I am, though, probably just like your gf: I do what I want, what feels right for me. And I would hope to pass along a more clear message of restraint and self esteem to younger ladies than I received, having grown up in the very hair-metal-groupie 80's.
 

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I've always been one to masturbate two or three times a day. During my pubescent and college years, it was even more. Sometimes I would rub the skin raw and have to stop for a while.

As an adult, I'm discovering that masturbation has been a coping mechanism for me all these yeaers. I've realized how much I need it just to function. It is a perfectly good way to relieve stress, yes, but I don't think I should have to do it twice a day just to be able to function. So lately I've been limiting myself, letting myself only do it once every three or four days. (And if I can't control myself between those days, I make up rules about it--for example, on the non-designated days, I make myself eat my cum). On the days I allow myself to do it, I allow myself to do it as many times as I want, but I try to be as gentle as possible on myself, to help restore any lost sensitivity, and keep a variety of methods and visual stimulation so that it stays a healthy and well-rounded event.
 

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I'm a total narcissist and can auto-fellate; Good enough reason for anyone I'd say.
 

hung

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It is the best Safe Sex You can practice. (I did this prior to marriage)
I enjoy pleasuring my self (I did this in my teens and still do as an adult)
It is still fun.

I do not let masturbation interfere with my fun filled sexual intercourse experience.

I try to live a balanced life, always enjoying everything.
 

dudepiston

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Yeah I like this post, man, because I think it focuses on some good issues.

Masturbation is healthy, no doubt about it. But of course, like anything, it can become unhealthy if done compulsively. I don't blame you for trying to cut down your sessions, but I'd also suggest that you should be careful to not allow THAT to also become an obsession. We're all different, but for me, if I don't do it at least once a day then I run the (rather large) risk of saying something stupid to an interesting person, whoever that might be and in whatever form that might take. It just helps me think clearer, without the "hum" of those hormones running around my brain saying "get-me-off!" But that's just me. Perhaps you are in a place where these thoughts do not overtake you if you don't masturbate or have sex.

Anyway, good post. Made me think :)




Nomad said:
I've always been one to masturbate two or three times a day. During my pubescent and college years, it was even more. Sometimes I would rub the skin raw and have to stop for a while.

As an adult, I'm discovering that masturbation has been a coping mechanism for me all these yeaers. I've realized how much I need it just to function. It is a perfectly good way to relieve stress, yes, but I don't think I should have to do it twice a day just to be able to function. So lately I've been limiting myself, letting myself only do it once every three or four days. (And if I can't control myself between those days, I make up rules about it--for example, on the non-designated days, I make myself eat my cum). On the days I allow myself to do it, I allow myself to do it as many times as I want, but I try to be as gentle as possible on myself, to help restore any lost sensitivity, and keep a variety of methods and visual stimulation so that it stays a healthy and well-rounded event.