Why I Am I Alone?

EyeInTheSky

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I just want to say that I'm alone too and have been wanting a girlfriend for a very long time now so you're not the only one. You must discover why somehow.

I am very shy. That's my problem. A girl once asked me "do you have a girlfriend" i said no and she said "probably cause you never talk." She's right.
 

lafever

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Better to wait for the right one then to end up with the wrong one. Trust me on this, i often say, if my life was like a bag of trail mix, my bag would be full of nuts and very few raisons. lol


lafever
 

Charles Finn

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I too am single again seems to be my lot in life thank god for my family this last bf moved out while i was at work.
I know I have baggage and issues but also have alot of love to give.
if I am to be without a lover so be it
this too shall pass
 

No_Strings

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What she said!
Viking, I'll say this out of concern:

Your negative view of yourself is a pathogenic belief, a belief that makes you miserable.

The reality of the idea is in your head. Most guys are not hung underwear model material. AND, it's my belief that a large number of women don't care about that anyway. You are smart, kind, steadfast, helpful, and attractive in a regular guy sort of way. You have what it takes.

If you actually want your situation to change, you need to do something to change it. Your life is unknown to me but I suspect you have, or could have, many opportunities to get to know people in person.

Possibilities include;
Take a class
Get involved in some kind of community service
Get involved in local politics
Begin attending some sort of social spiritual practice (There's something for everyone in that area)
Join a gym
Limit your online time
Ask yourself daily "What possibility did I fail to recognise and act upon, today?"

If you keep denouncing yourself, I'm going to have to smack you around, And I don't think gay B&D is your thing!

Quoted for emphasis.

And I'll continue to do so until viking1 understands this point.

:smile::biggrin1:
 

Meniscus

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I too am single again seems to be my lot in life thank god for my family this last bf moved out while i was at work.
I know I have baggage and issues but also have alot of love to give.
if I am to be without a lover so be it
this too shall pass

OK, please don't think I'm picking on you, but you might want to consider what kind of message you're putting out there when you say "I have a lot of love to give." Whenever I hear someone say that, I don't get the impression that they are loving and generous. Instead, I get the impression that they are clingy and needy. You might as well say "I'm a black hole of emotional need and I will suck you dry."

Again, I'm not saying that this describes you. I don't know anything about you. But I've learned from experience to stay away from people who say they have a lot to give, because it seems like they are desperate to be loved. I get the sense that they want something from me, but that they don't really see me for me. They just see me as a potential source of affection and validation, not a unique individual with his own unique interests, needs, desires...and baggage of his own.

Just something to think about.
 

Drifterwood

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SLB,

I once had a male classmate come to me in college and ask me why no one wanted to date him. It took me aback for a second but this is what I said. I told him that he was brilliant , handsome and had so much to offer but he was tooo open. People are afraid when you bare your soul to them too quickly. It seems to hold true. Most of us want to think we are winning a prize, getting the best bargain for what we have to offer. Whether it is true or not, showing big gaping emotional wounds and looking like a SCARED LITTLE BOY can often 1) attract other lost souls to you ( you have already experienced that) 2) attract people who will take advantage of you confusion 3)Drive away the quality person you so want to meet. I know it is hard to wait, but dont take this in between time as a confimation of your ultimate unloveability. You are all we tell you that you are, but you have to come to the point where you really believe it. Set a life's plan for yourself and stick with that. WHen someone sees that you are about your business they will be drawn to your direction. Try it.....
This is from an old lady who cares.:biggrin1:

What the old lady said :tongue:

The toughest lonelieness is that which you can experience inside a relationship.
 

Yorkie

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When SLB said he was pissed, I'm not sure he meant that he was drunk. His profile doesn't say where he lives, but in the U.S. "pissed" means angry.
SLB speaks UK English so he did mean :friday: .
If you regularly over-indulge in the alcohol it won't help your chances of meeting someone.Stumbling around and slurring your speech is never an attractive look.