Why is a Socially Dominant Man So Attractive?

[Act2_Begins_Now]

I'm a bit suriprised by the number of women here claiming they're not necessarily attracted to "alpha male" types. Its encouraging but still conflicts with what I've observed in my years.

Without reading any of the thread, I readily admit that I am attracted to the alpha male ... to an extent. Those who are mean, overly arrogant or alpha without cause will not capture my attention.

However, those who can lead, protect and are intelligent I am a sucker for them.

 

[ManlyBanisters]

I'm a bit suriprised by the number of women here claiming they're not necessarily attracted to "alpha male" types. Its encouraging but still conflicts with what I've observed in my years.

I think many of the posters have admited they are attracted to alpha males - while making the point that the biggest chest-beaters are not necessarily the real alphas.

 

[SpoiledPrincess]

What she said, an alpha male is someone who's quietly confident in his 'powers' not the guy standing in the corner being aggressive and cocky.

 

[goodwood]

As a socially "dominant" man, I have consistently attracted socially non-dominant women. Where I have, expect and receive social deference and respect as a result of building and cultivating relationships with others the women who are attracted to me do not. I find this perplexing since these women are smart, capable and socially ept (to some degree). In all of these women they seem fearful of taking chances and in me see a man who takes chances and is rewarded by it when he is favorably received for doing so and having it come out well - which is most of the time.
If a man is able and willing to take a calculated chance with a positive outcome socially, chances are he may also do so personally. If a man will do such a thing for himself, surely he will do this and more for a woman.
Perhaps this is attractive? I don't know. Ultimately women are the ones who decide and tell.

 

[SpeedoGuy]

I think easy going males who can be alpha OR gamma would be nice...

Those who are mean, overly arrogant or alpha without cause will not capture my attention.

...while making the point that the biggest chest-beaters are not necessarily the real alphas.

...an alpha male is someone who's quietly confident in his 'powers' not the guy standing in the corner being aggressive and cocky.

I respecfully submit that my observations have, in general, been in contrast to the statements above. Please note: I'm not implying any of you are wrong, rather, I've just not observed much genuine humility among alpha types or, conversely, projection of steadfast confidence from the quiet types. That optimum mix seems to me to be quite rare and virtually unobtainable, in my opinion.

Noisemakers are just not humble and quiet types, by definition, don't garner notice.

The reason I'm interested in such contrasts is this: When I read about the high rates of divorce in the US I can only conclude that prospective marriage partners are far too often committing while under the spell of what their prospective life partner is projecting rather than what that partner really is.

Alpha males and their noisy bravado are probably the biggest, but by no means the only, contributors to the problem of unrealistic expectations that lead to failed marriages. That's a shame, I think.

 

[Act2_Begins_Now]

I've just not observed much genuine humility among alpha types or, conversely, projection of steadfast confidence from the quiet types.

Hmmm, I suggest that the brash, knuckle dragging types aren't true alphas, they are insecure men who bark. A true alpha is confident and doesn't need to do any loud 'convincing'

What say you, Speedo?

 

[ZOS23xy]

alpha males seem to get all the chicks....

...only in movies.

Real life is another matter. I've known a couple overly wired and contact explosive mentalities, and they're overbearing, especially when they're wrong, and will not admit to ever being wrong.

I tend to be an alpha male when it comes to getting the facts correct, writing it down clearly, speaking my mind, raising an eyebrown, talking in A DEEP projecting baratone voice, and in the form, I'm a fucking cocky bastard.

 

[SpeedoGuy]

Hmmm, I suggest that the brash, knuckle dragging types aren't true alphas, they are insecure men who bark. A true alpha is confident and doesn't need to do any loud 'convincing'

What say you, Speedo?

I say that the quiet confident types may, in the end result, prove to be just as competent and capable as any others, alphas included.

...but quiet types are also rarely ever the first (or second) choices as dating material, marriage partners, leaders, or anything.

 

[ManlyBanisters]

I say that the quiet confident types may, in the end result, prove to be just as competent and capable as any others, alphas included.

...but quiet types are also rarely ever the first (or second) choices as dating material, marriage partners, leaders, or anything.

But we aren't talking about 'quiet types' - we are talking about the men who know when to be loud and when to be quiet and are capable of both in the appropriate circumstances. We are also talking about the men who don't need to shout and wave their arms (or beat their chests) to prove their point. We are talking about the men who just deliver - whether that be at work, in bed, emotionally. Those are the true alphas. The chest beaters are the challengers and they do get some attention from the non-alpha females. The alpha females however - and I think I can safely say the females you quote in your above posts are alpha - do not go for the chest beating challengers.

 

[Act2_Begins_Now]

But we aren't talking about 'quiet types' - we are talking about the men who know when to be loud and when to be quiet and are capable of both in the appropriate circumstances. We are also talking about the men who don't need to shout and wave their arms (or beat their chests) to prove their point. We are talking about the men who just deliver - whether that be at work, in bed, emotionally. Those are the true alphas.

Agreed

The alpha females however - and I think I can safely say the females you quote in your above posts are alpha - do not go for the chest beating challengers.

Yeppers

 

[lwd]

Agreed



Yeppers

Good stuff....and what, in your POV, is an Alpha female? Thanks.

 

[Act2_Begins_Now]

Someone who can and does take care of herself. Someone who doesn't NEED a man, but realizes she desires one.

 

[tiff86]

Yeah that's a good question. Honestly I don't really know. My bf is def. dominant when it comes to sex and he has sort of a strong personality but it's usually fun and only sometimes annoying :smile:. Anyway at first him being sorta dominant in bed I wasn't so sure about but it's totally grown on me but yeah, I don't really know why.

Just trying to get into a women's head for a moment...then later the pants

Why, from a woman's POV, is a socially dominant man so attractive?

When a woman sees a man who maybe average/decent looking (but not handsome) who is the Alpha male of his group, socially dominant, a leader in his in world (maybe runs his own business or something) why is that such an attractive feature? Where does the woman's mind go in terms of bridging that attraction? Does her mind suddenly fantasize about this guy being dominant in bed, fucking the shit out of her and splitting her in half? Does she fantasize about his having a big cock (let's say a protruding bulge is not part of the equation here) and ramming it into her?

Thanks.

 

[B_Hickboy]

I just smile and look pretty.

 

[B_superlarge]

Either directly, or indirectly, almost everything revolves around 'survival of our species'.