Why Is There So Much Bottom Shaming?

Peacemusic

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This problem is not new bottoming has historically been shamed as "receptive" or "weak" or used in the misogynistic sense "feminine" we really need to stop with Femme-shaming, and Devaluing Femininity and just constructed gender behavior in general anyone can be and act how they want. But the question I'm asking is why is there so much bottom hate in the gay male community? I have always thought the Bottoms always got the better end of the deal because they get to feel and orgasm more. Also it takes a lot of strength and stamina to be a bottom. At least Bottoms can take a lot that is put in them of that's not a sign of physical strength I don't know what is. I just really want to know more on this because I don't want to follow anymore bottom shaming rhetoric that I've internalized or read or seen online. The reason why some bottoms are called power bottoms. A prime example of Bottom shaming in the porn world is Armond Rizzo who is honestly the best bottom I have ever seen is up there with the other legendary porn bottom Joey Stefano. But so many toxic comments say " used up hole" and other bottom shaming mentalities. Why is there so much hate and internal oppression?
 
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T_Lurch

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I agree with you 100%. I would say that it is a remnant of old, vestigial attitudes from puritanical times.

I can't speak for attitudes in the gay world because, although bisexual, I've never been a viable partner or date and never been in a gay club or dated a man. I've seen clips of gay porn; but there was little to no dialogue. Does that attitude really occur even in that?!

For what it's worth, I am a bottom by nature. I enjoy sex either way, but prefer being the receiver and pleasuring the other person.
 
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7053701

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Part of it is because the guy is playing what is perceived as the traditional woman's role: the receiver, and the pleaser. They don't use their penises to get their partners off..they bend over and take another man's penis. Some view it as an emasculation, and, paired with that, others will treat them as more subservient and feminine.

..which leads into the whole fetish community, of more developed roleplay of the alpha male top, and the beta male bottom. Humiliation, shaming, degradation are all part and parcel in aspects of that community; a complete embracing of exaggerated roles, behavior, and language.

I find that once you get out of that, the "community", and in particular the fetish community, you don't see what you are describing. People that are partnered just do what they do, and no one really cares. I see that as being more emotionally and sexually mature, when the labels don't matter, and people just live their lives.
 
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deleted1074483

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i've said to guys i'm with/been with and on this site and at other times when this discussion happens that actually there should be no 'bottom shaming' as they 'control' access to sex (just as women do), they have to get over that mental issue of taking which takes a certain strength, they have to prepare and be ready for sex, they are the ones giving 'permission' to the top to fuck them, they are the ones taking/allowing their bodies to be fucked, etc so from my perspective i give lots of thanks and gratitude that there are bottoms out there and applaud them for it. I wouldn't get any sex without them.
 

Scarletbegonia

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My sense is that the shaming comes in “forced sissification” at the hand of a man or woman.

men in general get to inhabit a culture that throws away people after they used them, male or female (think of “wrecked pussy”).

Its a failure of the top to be able to see partners as whole people, but rather as merchandise with a pan expiration date, not someone who chose to give and receive pleasure.

it’s also a bit of a brag about how wonderful their weenie was.
 
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