Why it's better to be a woman . . .

Discussion in 'Funny Stuff: Jokes, Quizzes, Games & Pics' started by Principessa, Aug 8, 2007.

  1. Principessa

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2006
    Messages:
    19,494
    Likes Received:
    28
    Gender:
    Female
    Why it’s better to be a woman . . .

    We can get rid of leg hair without pretending that we do a lot of cycling/swimming, or any other sport that would require aerodynamic legs.

    We absently hum tunes from musicals without anyone being suspect of our sexuality.

    When we buy a vibrator it is glamorous. When men buy a blow up doll it's sad.

    We can wear platforms - which is why there is no such thing as a 'short woman's complex'

    We don't have to get our strength up between sessions, ...and it's much easier for us to get laid in the first place.

    We never ejaculate prematurely.

    We get to flirt with systems support men who always return our calls, and are nice to us when we blow up our computers.

    Our boyfriend's clothes make us look elfin and gorgeous - they look like complete dicks in ours.

    We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers.

    It's cool to be a daddy's girl. It's sad to be a mommy's boy.

    The thrill of surprising people by being good at darts......and pool.....and football.

    We live longer, so we can be cantankerous old biddies wearing inappropriate clothes and shouting at strangers . . .
    men die earlier so we get to cash in on the life insurance.

    We know that games are fun, but don't believe there's a direct correlation between the size of our scores and the size of our genitals.

    Taxis stop for us.

    We get drunk quicker and cheaper.

    We've never liked a cartoon character or the central figure in a computer game.

    It does not enhance our social standing to understand the “infield fly rule’ (or any other baseball thing). But we look INCREDIBLY cool if we do.

    And finally . . . We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing.


    :smile: :smile: :smile: :smile: :smile: :smile: :smile: :smile: :smile: :smile: :smile: :smile: :smile: ​
     
  2. June_Berry

    June_Berry New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 7, 2007
    Messages:
    27
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Female
    I like it, two things, though. Link is hotter then most of the guys I know in real life, and I really, really can't dance... It's sad...
     
  3. whatireallywant

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jun 4, 2007
    Messages:
    3,587
    Likes Received:
    7
    Gender:
    Female
    LOL - I like Link, too! :smile:

    I can't dance either - not specific steps anyway. I can "move to music" but I'm not sure I'd call that dancing!

    And hey, I'd like to be one of the "systems support men" - ok in my case it'd be "systems support woman", although I don't have my A+ certification yet (would like to) and really don't know anything much about hardware - I'm a programmer. Oh, and I do love going to technology meetup groups because I'm usually the only woman surrounded by all these men! But I have a difficult time concentrating on computer stuff or the job networking that brought me there, particularly if the men are attractive - last one I went to, one of them was VERY attractive and I couldn't concentrate at all on the computer stuff! Ah, the pitfalls of being a straight woman with a high sex drive and traditionally male interests...
     
  4. Principessa

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2006
    Messages:
    19,494
    Likes Received:
    28
    Gender:
    Female
    Who is Link?

    I always thought Shang in the animated feature Mulan was pretty hot. :redface:
     
  5. jeff black

    jeff black <img border="0" src="/images/badges/gold_member.gi

    Joined:
    Mar 2, 2006
    Messages:
    11,866
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    14
    Location:
    CANADA

    Why is that a perk? Leg hair doesn't hurt anyone.


    I hum all the time. People think I am very straight.


    What if we buy a vibrator?


    *wonders if all the fat/unattractive women in the world have anything to say about that.:cool:


    Nah, but you sure do bleed a lot.:eek: :rolleyes:


    Groupies? I thought we called you bandsluts?:redface:




    The same when guys are good cooks, cleaners, gardeners, dancers, or romantic.


    If we decide to stay married with you. Btw, older men get to date younger women, trading the "old biddies" and taking their insurance.


    Don't confuse pride with penis size. Competition is healthy for men, keeps us young.


    Did you flash your breasts to get him to stop?



    Wrong.:rolleyes: I've seen some bad female dancers.:biggrin1:
     
  6. June_Berry

    June_Berry New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 7, 2007
    Messages:
    27
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Female
    Link is the hero in the Legond of Zelda games, though in most of the games he's a little sprite (2D character). :rolleyes:
    A Shang was hot. My mom always had a thing for Beast in his human form. My first crush was on prinsess Jassmen. :wink:
     
  7. viking1

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Dec 2, 2006
    Messages:
    4,706
    Likes Received:
    5





    I thought they were one in the same. Guess I'm confused,

    Even if it's better to be a woman (I don't doubt that it is), I still have no desire to be one,
    (No disrespect to the ladies intended).
     
  8. Love-it

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Sep 7, 2005
    Messages:
    1,884
    Likes Received:
    2
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Northern California
    You also have approximately 1,539,000 different vibrators to choose from.
     
  9. June_Berry

    June_Berry New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 7, 2007
    Messages:
    27
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Female
    here here! I love good sollection!
     
Draft saved Draft deleted