Why women love being women, and I love being a man!

Discussion in 'Funny Stuff: Jokes, Quizzes, Games & Pics' started by roosevelt, Oct 15, 2006.

  1. roosevelt

    roosevelt New Member

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    A friend sent me an Email titled "Why it's great to be a woman"

    I replied to her list with my own thoughts of why I'm still glad I'm a man, in spite of all those things... (my responses in parenthesis)

    1. We got off the Titanic first. (we get off first)

    2. We can scare male bosses with the mysterious gynecological disorder excuses. (we don't have them)

    3 Taxis stop for us. (we know how to drive)

    4. We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing. (we can look bad dancing and still have fun, and pick up women "He's so bad it's cute")

    5. No fashion faux pas we make, could ever rival the Speedo. (I look damn good in a speedo.... ha, you didn't want that mental image did you?)

    6. We don't have to pass gas to amuse ourselves. (we're easily amused, and have a poor sense of smell)

    7. If we forget to shave, no one has to know. (we forget to shave, and by about day 3 we're sexy again)

    8. We can congratulate our teammate without ever touching her rear end. (you got me there, but as long as it's "her" butt and not "his" butt, you don't know what you're missing...)

    9. We never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there. (only because they aren't)

    10. We have the ability to dress ourselves. (women don't need to wear clothes for our sake!)

    11. We can talk to the opposite sex without having to picture them naked (we get to picture the opposite sex naked when we talk to them!)

    12. If we marry someone 20 years younger, we are aware that we will look like an idiot. (but a rich idiot!)

    13. We will never regret piercing our ears (we won't bother regretting it, we'll buy a motorcycle instead)

    14. There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems. (so can passing gas...)

    15. We can make comments about how silly men are in their presence because they aren't listening anyway. (huh, what did you say? I was picturing you naked...)
     
  2. Gillette

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    Hiss:mad:

    How about We don't give ourselves whiplash scoping women.

    Actually you've got some excellent comebacks.
     
  3. roosevelt

    roosevelt New Member

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    How about We don't give ourselves whiplash scoping women. (We do, and still manage to be better drivers...)

    :biggrin1:

    (no offense? I'm just being funny :redface:)
     
  4. Gillette

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    No offence taken. This is fun.

    I was expecting a comment on how women give whiplash to other drivers instead.

    17. Women don't broadcast visibly when we're turned on.
     
  5. roosevelt

    roosevelt New Member

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    17. Women don't broadcast visibly when we're turned on. (It sure would make life easier if you did!)
     
  6. curious n str8

    curious n str8 New Member

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    scuse me scuse me mam... but is it cold or are your nipples always hard? :shysmile: :mischievous: :tounge-in-cheek: :scratchchin:
     
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