Wife Doesn't Want big dick

[sonic81812003]

I have a problem. Im not huge but i'm 8" long with average thickness. My wife says its to big, and becuase of that we don't have sex that often. No matter how gentle i am. She not a big girl by an sorts so guess that may have something to do with it. She won't even give head becuase she says it to big and makes her gag. Feels awful not being able to give it to her. Any suggestions would be helpful.

 

[Hung1]

Have yopu considered using a dildo to please her, she may be into that?

 

[joker]

well, this is a hard one. I think there honestly may be something other than your cock size at hand. Maybe she just needs you to tell her what you want. Speakng from a female perspective, even if she can't take all of you in her mouth, she could at least lick and suck on the head....anything's better than nothing. Also, maybe you're not getting her worked up enough before hand. How much foreplay do you do?

For her to relax and get wet enough to take all of you, you need to set aside at least 2 hours for this. You need to pleasure her so much that she can't stand to not have you in her....but don't let her orgasm....just keep building her up....and change techniques...lets say you meet her at the door, run her a candlelit bath, then go to different rooms of the house.

Also, toys help ALOT. If she's never had anyone as big as you, she could "warm up" on something a little smaller than you before she tries to take you in. Trust me, if you were my hubby(he's not that big), I'd be all over you ALL the time!!

Good luck!

 

[kurios]

Find someone that appreciates what you have to offer

 

[RideRocket]

Not that sex is everything (it's about 90%) in a relationship, but why get married?

Joker makes a good point. There must be other issues at play. Either she is reluctant to tell you what she wants sexually, she's not happy in the relationship, etc. Sit down and have a honest talk with her about what's going on.

__________________
if that doesn't work, find some chick who loves your dick... :smile:

 

[Wonderboy]

Yeah. Ive never been refused and Im the same size as you, but thicker. No one has even made a big deal of the girth. Of course Ive never been married either.

If its a recent (or rushed?) marriage, maybe she just has jitters or something. I would have thought any girl would be happy to take a cock your size. Learn something new everyday.

You should talk like has been suggested.

NB: The apostrophe and other keys arent working on this keyboard

 

[txquis]

I had a girlfriend who was very petite and always found intercourse uncomfortable....and oral? forget it.....There are people who have trouble with size even when, as in my case, i am average.
Hang in there.

 

[STYLYUNG]

Get with it and get out of that marriage right now! If you don't get out of it, resign yourself to a sexless relationship. Sex is too important in a marriage to have to tease and fight for it. The desire for intercourse is natural in the human male and he shouldn't have to turn it off to keep peace in the bedroom. Get out now. She doesn't deserve you. You might get a clue about her reluctance to copulate; ask youself if you have noticed her warmness to close female friends. Go from there.

 

[Shelby]

Explain your needs to her and ask if she would be ok with you seeking extramarital sex. Assuming you wish to stay married.

 

[Love-it]

I have a problem. Im not huge but i'm 8" long with average thickness. My wife says its to big, and becuase of that we don't have sex that often. No matter how gentle i am. She not a big girl by an sorts so guess that may have something to do with it. She won't even give head becuase she says it to big and makes her gag. Feels awful not being able to give it to her. Any suggestions would be helpful.

I can tell you from personal experience that size can be a "big" isssue in a relationship. You don't have to trade in your wife as others are suggesting, this is their common jackass attempt at levity or a weird welcome to the group.

You haven't stated if it is length, girth or both that is the issue, each has its own problems and solutions: some of the following may help:

First she has to have the interest and/or desire to have sex with you, and you both need to be patient, loving and caring.

Patience, lots of foreplay, lots of lube, her using dildo's of increasing diameters and lengths until she is comfortable with a dildo that matches your size. If she is successful, she may need to dilate with the dildo's on a regular basis to help maintain her vaginal opening so that she can accommodate you.

There is a thread that talks about sex positions that are better for the larger penis. Woman on top seems to be a favorite.

As for her gagging on your penis while giving you oral: she may be trying to fit too much of your penis in her mouth or you may be unconsciously forcing more in than she can handle. Let her be in control and comfortable with what she can and cannot do and also what she will and will not do.

If you are patient and understanding you could wind up with a real vixen in bed.

 

[lisa_2662]

Sounds like she's not trying. Ya'll need to sit down and discuss this. And not even giving head because its too big is a lame excuse. Its not like she has to stuff all 8 inches in her mouth. She needs to put an effort into pleasing you, and you need to be patient and try and attend to her needs. If she's not even trying, then there's a problem, and its not how big your dick is.

 

[rope9839]

It also could be that the size thing is an excuse for a low sex drive. I can tell you that kind of sucks. I was married for a dozen years to a woman who really only wanted to have sex 2 or 3 times a month. It sucked, even if she didn't. She also sometimes used the "you are just too big" thing to get me to stop (or just finish).

Our marriage had other issues, so it may not be comparable, but I can tell you I will never get into another relationship where our needs are so unbalanced.

 

[Mr. Snakey]

:smile: You have to realize your size! If your 8 inches Start having sex with only half of it Let her get used to it! You have to be caring with a partner! Same with oral sex Tell her just to suck on the head !If you take the time and let her get used to it In no time at all She will be taking the whole thing. You want to make her feel good! Not pain!

 

[Jhonny1]

I am so sorry for you dude, Why would she marry you knowing the size of your dick. I simply do not buy this dick is to big line, there are others ways to give pleasure is she offering. A hand job should be the least that she would offer to do, but there has to be some underlying reason as to her not reasoning or being honest with you. Does she have a need to be satisfied? I am sure she has to be getting herself off and with no regard for you? Then that is very stingy. You both need some expert help to get to the real problem. That's like saying if the husband cannot get a boner then is that grounds to not have any type of sex play, dude that's really weak? you can enter her and not go all the way in, there are dick rings that men can use on their dick to prevent deep penetration thats one way. I think there are other reasons, is she really being honest with pal? You say that it feels awful not being able to give it to her (nice on your part) but find out how sorry she feels? Keep us posted.

 

[fortiesfun]

I have a problem. Im not huge but i'm 8" long with average thickness.

So here is the thing, eight inches is large even if it doesn't seem so on LPSG or in the lockerroom. And women are not all the same size either, just like men aren't. It is possible to have a mismatch that doesn't have to do with "gentleness" but fit. If you are hitting her cervix, it hurts.

There are a lot of great threads on this board about positions, about preparations, and about attitudes that will help. Keep reading. (And think about encouraging your wife to post herself to women's issues where she can get some independent advice.)

I have been married a long time, 20+ years, and I can assure you that things can get better but not without some real communications. You need to understand exactly why sex is uncomfortable for your wife physically, and convey that you care about sex being enjoyable for her, too. Not just a matter of fixing your problem, but also giving her pleasure. Surely, you don't want her to gag during oral, or ache during intercourse. If she knows that, she will be more open.

 

[Fredneck1951]

Sonic, we don't know your relative ages, how long you've been married, how long you knew each other before you got married, if you've ever had a mutually enjoyable sex life, what previous experiences/relationships the two you have had, etc. All those facts would be helpful in determining if you've got a situation that's developed over some time, or if you and your wife married without determining some very basic compatibility issues.

Let's say that you and your wife are younger rather than older, have been married not long, didn't know each other that long before you got married, never really had a mutually enjoyable sex life before you got married, and didn't have many experiences/relationships before you got married. If that's the case, then you have a lot of work ahead if you're going to make a go of it.

If that's not the case, you'll still have a lot of work, but at least you'll have some baseline success that can help provide motivation towards getting things back together.

When I was in my 20's, I knew a well-endowed guy, he fell in love with a very beautiful and very petite Asian woman, she was from a strict family and virginity before marriage was the watchword of the day. It was, unfortunately, a disastrous wedding night and a short-lived marriage. Both moved on, and are now happy.

Money is probably the worst potential danger in any relationship, but sex is a close second, I'd say.

If you want to return feedback, that would great.

 

[honeybun56]

I so don't want to hurt your feeling sonic, but she's cheating

 

[campbell]

My wife won't give me a blowjob saying that the "act" of doing that is gross (even though I am your size and nice and thick), she has on occasion but says it hurts her mouth, but loves my size and says the length is perfect but it's the girth that gets her feeling a little sore now and then. I can't believe your wife would say this to you; especially if you guys had sex before getting married. If she never told you this before what's her reason now? May she be cheating? I know that is not fun to think about and hard but it is a possibility; to find out go to leave for work as normal but don't go instead call in sick and hang out somewhere for a wile then go back home or watch the house from somewhere where she can't see you.

 

[ZapZav]

My wife won't give me a blowjob saying that the "act" of doing that is gross (even though I am your size and nice and thick), she has on occasion but says it hurts her mouth, but loves my size and says the length is perfect but it's the girth that gets her feeling a little sore now and then.

What's your girth?

to find out go to leave for work as normal but don't go instead call in sick and hang out somewhere for a wile then go back home or watch the house from somewhere where she can't see you.

:shocked: Spies! :002: :gives2: :dunno: :rofl:

 

[Andre80]

I so don't want to hurt your feeling sonic, but she's cheating

No offense, but who the hell are you to make that kind of assumption and state it as fact?