Wife going on vacation..I need sugestions as to how to occupy myself....

Discussion in 'The Healthy Penis' started by Biggin', May 20, 2008.

  1. Biggin'

    Biggin' New Member

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    I know you'd like this.
     
  2. Biggin'

    Biggin' New Member

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    guess not?
     
  3. spunkyboy2008

    spunkyboy2008 New Member

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    What about downloading some porn and keeping yourself occupied with your right (or left) hand?
     
  4. Biggin'

    Biggin' New Member

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    thats one suggestion, and i've been collecting links in a draft mail im going to send to myself....
     
  5. B_Nick8

    B_Nick8 New Member

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    I'd give you some suggestions but they'd shift your percentages :biggrin1:
     
  6. D_Cavernus Manhole

    D_Cavernus Manhole New Member

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    Sit and wonder why your wife wants to take a vacation without you :(.
     
  7. MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK

    MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK Well-Known Member

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    Call up your local pizzeria, ask for the young cute female driver to deliver the pizza, and offer to ball her as a tip.
     
  8. B_The Greek Dude

    B_The Greek Dude New Member

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    And then get taken to court for sexual harassment/assault, and beg the prisoners not to hurt you when they find out why you're in there.


    Just jerk off like the rest of us.
     
  9. MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK

    MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK Well-Known Member

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    Hey lighten up, will you?!:mad: It was supposed to be a joke. Fucking shit. The people who take this so damn seriously.:rolleyes:
     
  10. Biggin'

    Biggin' New Member

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    listen massive, this is a serious site here, even with penis pics, elmo pics, elephantitis, circumcision arguments, and wierd threads on going down on homeless people. You must be serious to be takes seriously.

    shes going to see her sister, and I opted to not take my vaca time.

    I was referring to, besides the usual jerking off (she got me a pocket pussy that is great, Gigi is her name)...

    I wanted advise.....like, going to the zoo, clothes shopping, gardening, get a tattoo, call an old girlfriend, get a bird, post pictures of your shlong, order chineese......

    but apparently, no one has taken my post seriously. seriously.
     
  11. D_Fiona_Farvel

    D_Fiona_Farvel Account Disabled

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    Pick up a tunnel bunny, fuck her in your bed, both of you skeet on the wife's pillow, then wipe off the crust the next day and see if she notices an odor?
     
  12. Biggin'

    Biggin' New Member

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    and really, female delivery people are far and few between. they are usually asian or teenagers, with acne that spans this planets races. Not exactly, um..."ball-able" as Massive would say.
     
  13. D_Fiona_Farvel

    D_Fiona_Farvel Account Disabled

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    Sowwy. :redface:
    How about going to the Brooklyn Museum for the Murakami exhibit? It is really cool!
     
  14. Biggin'

    Biggin' New Member

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    Tunnel Bunny.....is that a gay guy dressed in a bunny outfit?

    is that some kind of homo fag reference, Choco, the racist bigot?
     
  15. MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK

    MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK Well-Known Member

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    Cool enough, but your thread is rather ambiguous- you should've elaborated in OP. Sorry for the confusion.
     
  16. Captain Elephant

    Captain Elephant Active Member

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    If you go out to eat alone make sure you sit in the bar. Nothing more depressing than eating alone in the main dining room. The bartender will talk to you, and generally it's a good chance that there are other solo acts in there as well. Makes for good and interesting conversation.

    Usually when I tell a waitress in the bar that I'm a musician the talk gets a lot more lively. Can't really tell you why, but I guess they think most musicians are pretty whacked out and easy. I'm not that really whacked out.

    Forget the zoo. See if there's a street festival in the general area. Take your laptop to an Internet cafe. Go to a bar with live music, but dress cool. Shit, there's a bunch of stuff to do and you don't really have to think about it.
     
  17. Biggin'

    Biggin' New Member

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    Im kidding. but really, advice is welcome. serious, and not. its all fun. hahaha
     
  18. MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK

    MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK Well-Known Member

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    Go see a movie, call a friend, go to an art exhibit, go help your relatives on a project, clean up the house so she doesn't have to when she gets home
     
  19. D_Fiona_Farvel

    D_Fiona_Farvel Account Disabled

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    Relax, I was joking. However, I did offer a way for you to occupy yourself - if you don't like the idea, don't do it. If you wanted serious, fun day destination answers why not post in etc? :rolleyes:

    But, I do apologize if you were seeking other responses and were offended.
     
  20. pronatalist

    pronatalist Active Member

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    Maybe that's why more married couples should vacation together, and feel free to enjoy sex in the tent, motel room, or sleeping bag, even if children are present. Hopefully, the children may be asleep?, or one can figure out how to temporarily get rid of the kids. If they are old enough, children should be able to understand how to "disappear" for a while, and give parents some privacy. "How would you like a baby brother or sister? Then run along, and don't bother us, for around an hour."

    But understandably, not all vacations are of interest to both husband and wife, and so bringing them along may not always be practical.

    Pray that she soon gets back safely, and stock up on some microwavable dinners?
     
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