Hi
any of you in relationships where you have the higher sex drive & your partner wont give it up?
Its driving me insane. My wife & I have been married for 5 yrs and I'm lucky if we do it every 4 months.
She says its too painful, even though I catch her staring when I get changed. But she gets pissed if she catches me glancing at other girls or if any girl pays me attention. I suppose I'm just not sure how to handle this situation.
Has your wife been like this from the get go? Did she seem to enjoy sex before she married you? When did she start complaining about sex being too painful? Is it because you are too big for her?
A lot of people have given good advice.
I know my cousin......a female...... married this guy..... She and he had been living together before they got married. Didn't seem to be any problems with their sex life.....But after they married ......all of a sudden his desire to have sex ended up like every 2 to 4 months. My cousin and her husband ended up going to counseling and therapy as long her husband would go. Her husband had been abused as a child and it was just now coming back to haunt him. My female cousin really tried hard to make the marriage work (there was a child involved) But her husband decided that he didn't love her anymore......and that he didn't have any problems.....she was the one that had the problems because she wanted to have sex more often than every 4 months.
Anyways childhood abuse can be a factor. (I have seen a lot of that with my religious female friends.)
I have seen female problems be a factor......for not wanting to have sex because it is too painful.
Hopefully your wife knows that sex is important for you two to have a happy marriage (at least for your part) Maybe she will be motivated to go see her dr. and talk about the pain she is having when having sex.....If it isn't something physical.......then she needs to get her mental situation checked out. And marriage counseling is a good option too .....if the marriage counselor thinks someone needs mental health counseling they can refer that person to someone.
If your wife doesn't want to take care of you......with sexual intercourse......she needs to be compromising and taking care of you with hand jobs or oral.
If she doesn't she is setting you up to go looking for your needs being taken care of elsewhere.
My opinion of course.
Another thing you might try is getting your wife into looking at porn.....or Playgirl......maybe it might wake something up and get her juices going. Just a thought.