Sooooo.... I'll add my $02... for whatever the hell it's worth. I'm 5'9", decent build, have been told that I'm beautiful (by people that aren't related to me or just trying to get in my pants), have a good job and a good life. I have high standards for who I share my world with. At my height, and with my penchant for ridiculous footwear, I like VERY tall men. Like 6'4" is my ideal... the height that you get full credit for being tall-tall and not having all the joint problems and other issues that go along with being crazy tall. Also on my checklist of shallow/superficial items is someone who is fit, with good teeth, a full head of dark hair, makes a decent living, etc.
My last bf was very few of those things. He was "just" 6' (so I was often taller than him in heels), was balding, made about 1/3 of what my ex-husband made, and was over 300 lbs. BUT he was smart and kind and respectful and most importantly, confident in how he approached me. He had enough of the important things (kind, smart, honest, faithful, funny, curious about life) that made me look past my shallow checklist and go out with him. I expected to just be friends with him, but on our first date, the way he looked at me, I was smitten. I learned about all the other great things he brought to the table and we became exclusive. Many of my friends said I was "dating down" until they got to know him. We were together for 3.5 years because we had so many of the important things in common and because he was willing to "go for it" in asking me out. Are women shallow? Sure... but we can easily be swayed by someone who has their shit together AND has self-confidence.
So... get your shit together, learn to appreciate what you have to offer a woman and THEN look for one who will appreciate your gifts... whatever those are. Look for the deeper connection than what puts lead in your pencil. It'll be worth it.