M. Rouge, I don't know you, but I have found your contributions here to be thoughtful and at times, damned exciting.
I wish you every good outcome and I'm sure that is what you will experience. Healing from major surgery just plain takes a while. Be patient, and look for the good things in the immediate future, like genuine, caring people looking over you in the hospital and at home. Nurses are one of the major unsung hero groups of our culture (and they make damn good lovers, too)!
Go into it with confidence and know that many people here, some you know and some you don't, are thinking of you are wishing you the very best.
Sincere hugs from a stranger,
TLG