Women and size preference

Lordpendragon

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You reminded me of this Big Dreamer

Five steps for women to find fulfilment


1 Find a man who is kind, will never lie to you, likes to cook and will
help with the housework

2 Find a man who will make you laugh

3 Find a man who is clean, well groomed, and has a good job

4 Find a man who is a great lover

5 Ensure that these four men never meet each other
 

Big Dreamer

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You reminded me of this Big Dreamer

Five steps for women to find fulfilment


1 Find a man who is kind, will never lie to you, likes to cook and will
help with the housework

2 Find a man who will make you laugh

3 Find a man who is clean, well groomed, and has a good job

4 Find a man who is a great lover

5 Ensure that these four men never meet each other

No wonder I keep finding strange socks and underwear in my laundry. I'm not the husband I thought I was, as there's a team working here!:confused:

I guess that explains why the grass is always cut. :rolleyes:
 

transformer_99

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It's all about rejection and we have all experienced it in one way or another.

This is the best summary I've read in this entire thread. The relationship itself ran it's course and being dumped (dumpee) or being the dumper, "size of the penis" is offered as the obvious and a convenient excuse of why the relationship failed. If the guy was a liar, married cheater, it doesn't matter if the penis was 5 1/2 or even 12 inches. The other aspects of the relationship fell apart long before the penis size was complained about. Get dumped by or dump enough men that have a common characteristic of a 6 inch penis, and that obviously must be the whole problem ?

LPD's 5 steps post summary is a wittingly funny analogy too ! Only #4 needs to be modified to be:

4. Find a man who is a great lover and measures up to the woman's concept of being hung.

And #5 should be:

5. Make sure the traits required for the man who possesses traits 1-4 is in fact, a single male individual.

That is the happiness that the hottie, the cougar, or whatever other term used to describe women throughout their lifetime is going to need.
 

transformer_99

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No wonder I keep finding strange socks and underwear in my laundry. I'm not the husband I thought I was, as there's a team working here!:confused:

I guess that explains why the grass is always cut. :rolleyes:

See, if wifey had thought that out, you'd have several wardrobes to choose from when the laundry is clean. Now, the lawn maintenance aspect, who could find fault with that, it gives you more time to go play golf ! :biggrin1:
 

AlteredEgo

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It's my platinum pussy clouding my reality again. Thanks for setting me straight. :biggrin1:

Any time, Miss Bliss!

It's the #2 style of post that I have issues with, and I've seen a ton of them lately. The "I love my boyfriend and want to marry him, but his penis is 2 inches too short for my needs". I guess I wonder why it took 3 years to figure that out. The other good one is; "My girlfriend is hot, and a really good fuck, but she won't blow me..... should I dump her? I really love her, but I gotta have them BJ's". I'm just curious how these people got through that initial phase of the relationship (casual dating) and decided to jump headlong into something long term if some of their basic sexual requirements were not getting fulfilled.

Sometimes you don't realize you need something until you aren't getting it. The less experience one has the harder it is to separate needs from wants and prioritize them. I used to think I just wanted a non-smoker, until I found out I have a tobacco allergy. Now that's number two on my list instead of near the bottom. Also, sometimes a body changes as it is aging, or new life experiences create new needs. I know of a woman who could not have vaginal orgasms, only clitoral ones. She of course had no size preference, but thought she might be missing out on something. She changed her lifestyle, and learned to have vaginal orgasms. Now a small penis simply will not cut it. Things change, people change understandings change. And if something changes for you, why should you remain unsatisfied just to maintain the status quo? I know you don't want to judge people, but you are.



I'm happily married with great kids and what I would define as a "good life" if I factor in health, ecomomic prosperity, and closeness with loved ones. Having said that, there are still compromises that I make every day with my wife as we're not carbon copies of each other (who would want that?). To stay single until you find a lover that perfectly embodies every physical attribute, sexual fetish, political viewpoint, sense of humor, taste in art, blah, blah, blah, would be to die alone, never having dated.
No one is saying that this is what they are doing. You are making judgement-based assumptions. Society teaches us that sex is gross and dirty and that we are not allowed to prioritize it. The fact is, any person can order their priorities any way they like. And it isn't wrong. That's why I can place bad teeth as an absolute deal-breaker. That's why it's okay that I jog 5 times a week and my man is a couch potato. Sure I want him to work out with me, but it's okay that he'd rather watch Voyager. That's why it's okay for me to place dark hair on my list of needs (yes! needs. I am not attracted to blondes generally) but not care much about penis size.

And did you know that there are still people who become long-term partners without having ever had sexual encouters with each other? I'm just as shocked as you are, but it happens. :tongue:

I guess the root of what I'm saying is that it might be wise to define what's on your "want" list in a potential partner, and what's an "absolute need" in choosing a lover. I have a whole bunch of friends that skipped this step and many of them are now divorced, miserable, and fighting over child custody and assets.

That's what people are trying to do, but they keep getting judged. I think that in part it is a fear of being seen as a bad person that has some people skipping this step.

"Why'd you guy sbreak up?"

"I found out he had a big/small penis. I oculdn't get used to it. I tried."

"Is that all? Boy you'r shallow to place such a high importance on sex. Sex isn't everything."

or

"Whatever happened to Sylvia?"

"She was never going to learn to give better head."

"What a pig you are! Your mother would be ashamed!"

You perpetuate a bad cycle, Man. So does everyone who makes the same insistance.
 

AlteredEgo

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This is the best summary I've read in this entire thread. The relationship itself ran it's course and being dumped (dumpee) or being the dumper, "size of the penis" is offered as the obvious and a convenient excuse of why the relationship failed. If the guy was a liar, married cheater, it doesn't matter if the penis was 5 1/2 or even 12 inches. The other aspects of the relationship fell apart long before the penis size was complained about. Get dumped by or dump enough men that have a common characteristic of a 6 inch penis, and that obviously must be the whole problem ?

Why can't someone just be moving on becasue the sex wasn't very good? Don't you think bad sex or (for that matter) any one source of dissatisfaction can poison the rest of the relationship?


4. Find a man who is a great lover and measures up to the woman's concept of being hung.
(...)
That is the happiness that the hottie, the cougar, or whatever other term used to describe women throughout their lifetime is going to need.
Not me. I just need something as big as a finger and everything else is a bonus. But I certainly don't consider that hung. That's very small.
 

Big Dreamer

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I realize that when you lack experience, you make mistakes AE. My life is full of mistakes, and while the frequency of making doozies is reducing, I still need to backtrack and re-evaluate often. I agree with all of what you said above, but I guess I look at life from the perspective of having to choose a lifemate to have children with, and the extra viligance that you would hope people would take when making the biggest decision of their lives.
I don't have a problem with breaking up a relationship based on the sex being shitty, nor did I state that anywhere in my post. I was only suggesting that you will also through the good out with the bad, and the friends I know that have chosen that path are personally miserable.
 

AlteredEgo

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I realize that when you lack experience, you make mistakes AE. My life is full of mistakes, and while the frequency of making doozies is reducing, I still need to backtrack and re-evaluate often. I agree with all of what you said above, but I guess I look at life from the perspective of having to choose a lifemate to have children with, and the extra viligance that you would hope people would take when making the biggest decision of their lives.
I don't have a problem with breaking up a relationship based on the sex being shitty, nor did I state that anywhere in my post. I was only suggesting that you will also through the good out with the bad, and the friends I know that have chosen that path are personally miserable.

It just seems to me that you are assuming that people who prioritize sex ONLY prioritize sex. That is simply not always the case. Just because someone leaves their partner to find someone with whom they have a better sexual connection doeesn't mean that they aren't still looking for all the things they were drawn to with that person in addition to great sex. You seem to be implying that those sets of traits are diametrically opposed.
 

Big Dreamer

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It just seems to me that you are assuming that people who prioritize sex ONLY prioritize sex. That is simply not always the case. Just because someone leaves their partner to find someone with whom they have a better sexual connection doeesn't mean that they aren't still looking for all the things they were drawn to with that person in addition to great sex. You seem to be implying that those sets of traits are diametrically opposed.

??? I just re-evaluted my post, and I don't see that at all, but I wrote the dang thing, so I may be biased. I'm not saying that you can't be a great lover, and awesome father, a funny dude, and a hard worker at the same time. God didn't give big dicks to a few, personalities to a few, brains to a few, but not offer any overlap. The people posting are mentioning that they have deficiencies in their relationships and all I'm say is "Yup, that sucks for sure, there are a LOT of different types of deficiencies....... here's a few more." For the record, I DO NOT think that a man or woman who chooses sex as a top priority has no other priorities. I specifically know that they have other priorites like we all do, and that's why I'm not afraid to mention these 'other issues' when relationship discussions enter into threads.

When people seek out serious relationship advice in LPSG, it's hard to give any sound advice if all they've only given a one liner about a lovers penis size, or a sexual act that they like or dislike. That's why I try to also gain perspective on the other feelings and needs that make then tick. I'll be careful in the future not to do it at the expense of the original and more pointed sexual topic, as that's just thread hijacking, which is frowned upon in these here parts.
 

transformer_99

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Why can't someone just be moving on becasue the sex wasn't very good? Don't you think bad sex or (for that matter) any one source of dissatisfaction can poison the rest of the relationship?

Not me. I just need something as big as a finger and everything else is a bonus. But I certainly don't consider that hung. That's very small.

Sure, the first part of your post is a possibility, it's just that personal experience, even observance of others tells me otherwise. Failed relationships are a culmination of a lot of factors. Did it start with merely penis size ? OK, if that's what one wants to lay as the foundation ? But could it be more attributable to boredom ? That is after going to the same restaurants, same vacations, settling into a lifestyle that simply is safe, but boring ? Take it further, what if the 2 incomes don't afford the quality of life, arguments over any and everything else. The poor little penis is a target for a cheap shot. Hey, men do it too, all of a sudden the vagina stinks, is too loose, the ass isn't as firm as it used to be. Or could it be the breasts are saggy. We all age, we all fall into a ho-hum lifestyle trap. Talk to enough of the broken hearted or disillusioned spouses (male and female) and there are several common denominators. So everyone on the planet is deficient or has been in some way, shape, form or another ?

I agree, it doesn't take a penis at all for a woman to have her orgasm. a finger is plenty and that would be a micro-penis by most's interpretations. Bottom line, you are responsible for your own sexual satisfaction. That's accountability and responsibility. That's why when I hear, "the penis was too small", please ! Certainly there's a better reason than that ?
 

LemacST

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I'm thinking this thread is after I attacked nj for her moot posts.

I totally will stand behind a size queen, if thats what you like more power to you. Holly I'd quote your post, but it's too darn big, and Dimond as well.
It is not the fact that size queens exist, it was the comment as such
Which just made me snap. I think this is the most shallow view on anything. Thats like telling a guy you wont marry him because his eyes are blue, or he has small feet. Or lets turn it around and say.... a guy wont marry you because your pussy colour is too dark. It's something out of someones control. So thats fine you have those standards, cool. But I'm still going to laugh, and make fun of you for having standards like that. The fact that "falling in love" is something someone thinks they can control is even more of something to laugh at.


So size queens rock on, but please don't explain it like that.

NJQT is a troll, not in the sense that she's fake but the fact that she lies about stuff just to start shit. I remember in one thread, which included pictures, she told me I was "slightly larger than average". A couple of threads later, for reasons I don't know, she came in and told me I was extremely/barely average and "not enough to get the job done" along with other things purely in attempt to hurt my ego.
The thing that's cute though is that I always see her on here crying about how many men didn't accept the way she was growing up because she didn't exactly fit the "ideal" standards men generally hold (she was pretty tall and very flat-chested). Now not so ironically, now she holds size queen standards and talks down to/about men who aren't packing a massive penis, which is about 95% of men in the world.
This is the shameful kind of size queen. If a girl like Deb really absolutely needs a larger than average penis to get her off, that's fine, more power to her. She knows what she needs and is being honest with herself and others on how to get her off. Better to do that than to lead on a smaller guy. NJqt just goes out of her way to belittle men who don't meet up to her standards, more likely than not because she got her emotions shit on by many men and this is her way to bitterly get back at men as a whole.

Basically, if a girl absolutely needs a large penis to get herself off and she knows it--Good, more power to her. Large penises exist for a reason.
But if you're a girl who claims she needs a large penis because average-sized men made feel ugly your entire life, you need to grow up.
 

lemont77

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I don't think I even get the question. It boils down to whether the sex feels good or not. If it does, big or small, what's the problem? If there are those out there that want plus size only, then bully for them! I know some girls who don't want more than a mouthful...to each their own, right?
 

transformer_99

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??? I just re-evaluted my post, and I don't see that at all, but I wrote the dang thing, so I may be biased. I'm not saying that you can't be a great lover, and awesome father, a funny dude, and a hard worker at the same time. God didn't give big dicks to a few, personalities to a few, brains to a few, but not offer any overlap. The people posting are mentioning that they have deficiencies in their relationships and all I'm say is "Yup, that sucks for sure, there are a LOT of different types of deficiencies....... here's a few more." For the record, I DO NOT think that a man or woman who chooses sex as a top priority has no other priorities. I specifically know that they have other priorites like we all do, and that's why I'm not afraid to mention these 'other issues' when relationship discussions enter into threads.

When people seek out serious relationship advice in LPSG, it's hard to give any sound advice if all they've only given a one liner about a lovers penis size, or a sexual act that they like or dislike. That's why I try to also gain perspective on the other feelings and needs that make then tick. I'll be careful in the future not to do it at the expense of the original and more pointed sexual topic, as that's just thread hijacking, which is frowned upon in these here parts.

Not only those other issues you mention that cause relationships to fail, but the deficiencies that are out there. Are they real or contrived ? Contrived because the expectations are simply unrealistic. Men may look @ women and simply demand she be a Jessica Simpson look-a-like, the genius smarts of Albert Einstein, financially loaded like Theresa Heinz-Kerry. And of course every woman on the planet is simply not going to measure up. Then society creates a term for this syndrome, that is older men that seek "beauty queens". Oh wait, we already have labeled the syndrome as a "mid-life crisis" and those guys are "cradle robbers" ? So in that regard, as men, should we eliminate anything that doesn't have a Jessica Simpson body as deficient ? Maybe this is what cougars and size queens are angry about ?
 

AlteredEgo

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So in that regard, as men, should we eliminate anything that doesn't have a Jessica Simpson body as deficient ? Maybe this is what cougars and size queens are angry about ?

As men should you? No. That's stupid. As individuals? Maybe. After all, I don't want to be with my man if he doesn't think I'm at least as hot as Jessica Simpson, because there's always someone else burning up for me. So many labels in your post! Who told you so-called cougars and size queens were angry? Do you not se the sexism implicit in that statement? Why do they have to be angry? Why can't they just like what they like?

Big Dreamer, after your last post, I think I finally understand. :smile: Kinda.
 

Wyldgusechaz

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rob just rob"s previous post is well written.

As an aside we as humans have been around for 150000 years. If the average penis didn't do the trick pretty damn well it certainly would have been selected against a long time ago.
 

Big Dreamer

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As men should you? No. That's stupid. As individuals? Maybe. After all, I don't want to be with my man if he doesn't think I'm at least as hot as Jessica Simpson, because there's always someone else burning up for me. So many labels in your post! Who told you so-called cougars and size queens were angry? Do you not se the sexism implicit in that statement? Why do they have to be angry? Why can't they just like what they like?

Big Dreamer, after your last post, I think I finally understand. :smile: Kinda.

Whatever you do AE, never admit to understanding me. Big men with white coats and straight jackets will surround your house within minutes! The "kinda" at the end may save you the electro-shock treatment.
 

B_Think_Kink

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NJQT is a troll, not in the sense that she's fake but the fact that she lies about stuff just to start shit. I remember in one thread, which included pictures, she told me I was "slightly larger than average". A couple of threads later, for reasons I don't know, she came in and told me I was extremely/barely average and "not enough to get the job done" along with other things purely in attempt to hurt my ego.
The thing that's cute though is that I always see her on here crying about how many men didn't accept the way she was growing up because she didn't exactly fit the "ideal" standards men generally hold (she was pretty tall and very flat-chested). Now not so ironically, now she holds size queen standards and talks down to/about men who aren't packing a massive penis, which is about 95% of men in the world.
This is the shameful kind of size queen. If a girl like Deb really absolutely needs a larger than average penis to get her off, that's fine, more power to her. She knows what she needs and is being honest with herself and others on how to get her off. Better to do that than to lead on a smaller guy. NJqt just goes out of her way to belittle men who don't meet up to her standards, more likely than not because she got her emotions shit on by many men and this is her way to bitterly get back at men as a whole.

Basically, if a girl absolutely needs a large penis to get herself off and she knows it--Good, more power to her. Large penises exist for a reason.
But if you're a girl who claims she needs a large penis because average-sized men made feel ugly your entire life, you need to grow up.
Interesting..
 

Lordpendragon

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Rob's point in the other thread that there are three billion women and so three billion answers to these questions is a good one. I would only temper this with the observation that a large percentage of people, men and women, don't know what their sexual preferences and priorities are.

Experience counts for a lot, if you allow yourself to have it. I think a lot of the disparate points here add up to the issue.

We are bombarded with expectations, either of the Jessica Simpson type (I'd never heard of her btw till she was mentioned here) or some hot hung eye candy on the other side. So I can't blame LemacST for his insecurity/inquisitiveness, but it is the wrong question. Is my penis big enough? I don't know, go and have sex with it and find out, I'm sure it is. But don't imagine that you will leave three billion women in a post orgasmic haze.

What happens though as you gain experience, is that you learn what you both like and need in terms of priorities. If you were lucky enough to know these when you committed to a partner and shared them, then, as Big Dreamer is saying, you are likely to have a good ongoing relationship. Though of course people's priorities change and sadly once shared priorities diverge.

Getting back to size specifically, I wonder if my experience is common? I had two longer term relationships in my late teens and twenties that ended because of incompatability. We could have sex, but it hurt me often, I ripped my frenulum on a regular basis and i think I ended up with something of a penetration phobia - anyway they both ended despite everyone telling us that we were the perfect couple blah blah blah and the lack of sexual satisfaction was clearly a part of that. This is why I am always interested in Love-it's perspective. Strangely now though, I do have one friend who I see on a regular basis with whom I can't have full sex, but we have great fun otherwise. The expectation desire for the perfect relationship union is not on the cards so we can just have fun anyway.

So, whereas you hear a lot of women say that size is more important for recreational sex than in a long term relationship, I would say the opposite for me.