Women: is it true some guys just don't "do" foreplay?

BobLeeSwagger

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madame_zora said:
I think a woman who is eager and able to give a good blow job is probably about as rare as a man who is actually good at and into giving oral.

I don't know how many guys know how to eat at the Y, but proportion of women who have given me great head can't be more than 1 in 4. Some actually inflicted pain instead and I had to bust out the "I've gotta have you right now!" line.
 

pinupbeauty

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What about having mental foreplay? You can get each other really going if the both of you know how to gear each other up....if you have great mental foreplay....you can skip the touching and get down to the fucking!!!


pinup
 

KidBrown

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Yup, there's a direct connection in most people between the brain and sexual arousal. Learn how to stimulate the mind first, and sex is so much more fufilling.

But jeez.....another post about skipping the "touching"? Makes me wonder sometimes.
 

B_Spladle

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madame_zora said:
I rarely find a guy who's interested enough to learn to give oral well.
Maybe we just think vaginas are scary.

They. Maybe they just think vaginas are scary. :biggrin1:
madame_zora said:
I'm sure if I only had one standard blowjob technique there would be a lot of guys who would be bored to death.
Not me! :tongue:
 

B_Spladle

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SurferGirlCA said:
I think another aspect of this is that guys watch porn and so they have a really strong idea about what THEY want a girl to do to them based on that. On the other hand, most porn that I've seen does not spend a lot of time focusing on pleasuring a woman orally, so guys are kinda flying blind down there. Also I am sure that a lot of girls don't feel comfortable giving pointers, so guys just do what they've always done and assume it's doing the trick. God forbid a man be made to feel he isn't sexuality incarnate all on his own. :tongue:
I don't think I've ever actually had a girl walk me through what she wanted me to do down there. For me at least, nonverbal cues are key.
 

ClaireTalon

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KidBrown said:
Believe it or not, I've had the problem in the past where a woman has mentioned "just fuck me" and it weirds me out a little bit. It's funny what makes me anxious.....something like a small comment in regards to sex makes me queasy, but I can see an autopsy in person and not be phased.

Maybe I just take it wrong, but when I get the whole "I just wanna fuck" comment, it takes the fun out of sex for me. Animalistic fucking is fun for me every once in a great while, but it takes a special circumstance for me to like it. Generally I'm the kind that likes "making love". Sucks that most of the girls that are attracted to me are like "spank me, choke me, and fuck the shit outta me......leave the staring into my eyes somewhere else".......haha.

Christ, maybe I'm not tough at all anymore.....damn.

Usually such situations are preceded by a lot of mental foreplay. You'd not have a boner to fuck a girl up against the wall of a bar's ladies' room if you hadn't at least had some fantasy or thoughts on your mind about what was to come, trust me. If it happens as you tell, the girl has had these images whereas you as her "victim" are pushed into the situation. For that reason, if I am out for a quick fuck, I give the man some time and signals so he knows what's up, so he's primed. Then just some kisses, clothes down, condom on and - take-off!

Foreplay shouldn't be taken more serious than the downright fucking itself, and there should be a flowing tranisition between these phases too. I don't think I do a real foreplay except during rare exceptions. Is there something like a standardized definition of what foreplay means?
 

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I personally enjoy foreplay and almost require it! Sex is something that is sensual to me. I suppose I am at an age where I can choose to either "screw" or to have a more engaging relationship. Both are good, but I have my preferences.

As it relates to oral, I am almost DEMAND it. Women, like men, enjoy this. Albeit, not all men are good at it. Like someone mentioned earlier... that is where communication is vital. I have no problem telling my partner what I want and what I like. I would hope he would not either.

In other words, you want to get in with the Doctor, then you need to make an appointment, first. :D
 

Lordpendragon

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madame_zora said:
Lordpendragon, you have a good point about foreplay, but I think it is a male/female difference again. I think for women, calling it a separate and distinct thing is less threatening, but for men it adds another chore. Go figure, we look at things differently and it clouds the issue for both.

It's hard enough learning to know yourself, let alone aliens.

My view would be to be yourself - presumably that's who the other person intended to be having sex with.
 

Annie

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NYC8" said:
This might be a total dumbass-level question and it's certainly something that seems like "common knowledge"--however, a lot of things that are "common knowledge" are also just widespread rumors and cliches.

So, ladies, in your experience, what was the percentage of men who wanted to take care of you, versus those who very clearly only wanted to throw it in ASAP? Is it mostly a cliche, or will lots of guys just "not do" whatever, even if they are aware that you (or most women) want it?


I've met 4 men who actively wanted to take care of me. The rest might not have kicked me to the curb, but enjoyed the idea of dating on more even ground without the pressure of having to adopt a new pet.
The men who really liked pampering me of their own accord, scored higher points...for sure!
 

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Dr. Bubbles said:
I personally enjoy foreplay and almost require it! Sex is something that is sensual to me. I suppose I am at an age where I can choose to either "screw" or to have a more engaging relationship. Both are good, but I have my preferences.

As it relates to oral, I am almost DEMAND it. Women, like men, enjoy this. Albeit, not all men are good at it. Like someone mentioned earlier... that is where communication is vital. I have no problem telling my partner what I want and what I like. I would hope he would not either.


In other words, you want to get in with the Doctor, then you need to make an appointment, first. :D

I agree with the good doctor. I think that communication goes hand in hand with good sex. If you know what each other likes than the chances of pleasing each other definitely increases. I think that when one partner is not interested in pleasing the other it shows a lack of respect and pure selfishness. I personally love foreplay. I love kissing a woman all over. I love giving massages and giving oral. It is a real turn on for me when I make a woman cum during oral. I have learned that if you please a woman and treat her well, she will most likely take care of you. Communication, mutual respect, and a generosity is the key.

I think I need to book a doctors appointment.:smile:
 

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I'll tell ya what..... I'm all about foreplay, but certain shit is sickening to me though. I has having quite the hot "I'm pressing you hard up against the wall and tounge raping you" session.....then I heard terrible music coming from her mix CD that was on in the background. Maybe music isn't "foreplay", but it's a mood setter.....which is supposed to relax someone for sexual escapades. So it's the same general ballpark.

Anything by whiny artists puts me out of the mood very quickly. U2 fucking blows, there I said it.....I don't care if they're supposed to be one of the greatest bands of all time, they irritate the shit out of me. Same with REM, jeez. I literally think the sound of Bono's voice is like injecting 12 beers into my system all at once. My dick just wants to be left alone after that, haha.

I define foreplay as anything 'fore sex, haha. Easy definition since I think someone asked earlier.
 

Dr. Bubbles

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Mr.Grande said:
Just kidding around. I didn't mean to upset you.:smile: :smile:

Oh, you did not upset me... I am just being my normal self... Ask some of the guys around what I am doing. lol
 

lapdog2001

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Dr. Bubbles said:
Oh, you did not upset me... I am just being my normal self... Ask some of the guys around what I am doing. lol

Dr. B teasing the guys? No, couldn't be!:jester:

I've mentioned it before many times, I love foreplay! I think it adds greatly to the sexual experience whether it is just mental, physical, or both. Would I say 'No thanks" if the woman I was with said 'Just fuck me'? No way! I'd be on her in a second! Quickies and just getting down and dirty are fine too and have their place in a healthy sexual relationship. Turning a woman on, turns me on bigtime.:smile:


LapDog :yumyum:
 

Dr. Bubbles

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lapdog2001 said:
Dr. B teasing the guys? No, couldn't be!:jester:

I've mentioned it before many times, I love foreplay! I think it adds greatly to the sexual experience whether it is just mental, physical, or both. Would I say 'No thanks" if the woman I was with said 'Just fuck me'? No way! I'd be on her in a second! Quickies and just getting down and dirty are fine too and have their place in a healthy sexual relationship. Turning a woman on, turns me on bigtime.:smile:


LapDog :yumyum:

So you say...Lap. ;) I am never a tease... Maybe a flirt, but never ever a tease.......
 

Paul Vincent

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I did foreplay once when me and my girlfriend first had sex. I would do it now but it just isnt necessary! Dripping wet is an understatement...


Going along with what KidBrown was saying, I was licking my girlfriend out (eating her out in some countries) and fingering her at the same time. Out of nowhere she starts going on about her insect bites; "look at the bites, theyve gone down a bit" lol I said what are you talking about them for? hehe.

I might start doing more foreplay though, since my erections are coming and going and not ready when I need them...think its nerves, since I dont want to hurt her and she has screamed 'fuckin hell!' in pain a few times...but all is well.

Anyways, more foreplay would help I spose but its not necessary. In the time it takes for us to get naked, my girlfriend is ready for some hardcore sex ;)