Daily, I make an excellent living saying horrendous things to men. The first time I ever went to a BDSM club, I was approached by a few men who liked the look of my suede boots and wanted me to step on their cocks or balls or both. I had brought a pretty, blue, lucite paddle that used to be part of a toy I had as a kid, just to look the part. Several men asked if I would beat their balls with the paddle. Only one asked for a more traditional type of spanking, just as I was leaving. Or was that the second time? I don't know. I just remember being nervous as hell and feeling kinda phony. I'm not really into that scene, it was just research, and I was afraid I'd be exposed as a fraud the entire time. But it went well. it was educational, amusing, and some of it was even sexy. Anyway, the point is, nothing is demeaning unless it's meant to be demeaning. One man's insult is another man's come-on. There's nothing wrong with a facial, or pearl necklace or whatever, as long as there exists a mutual understanding of respect and friendship.