wvalady1968: Max recently wrote, "Just one other thought about the topic .. this is a two way street, or ought to be. Anything that makes one partner feel like the consumer and the other the performer of sex is bad. As SillySally implied, it is just that .. a partnership. She needs "to know what she's doing" as well. " Okay, most of us have learned what our lovers like, which buttons work and which don't. And open communication is ALWAYS vital, but for the moment, assume that you're with a new lover who doesn't know you but is willing to try anything you've ever fantasized about. What would you tell her? How would you instruct her?