Okay I admit I am in a pissy mood today but if anyone calls either one of my kids "baggage" they better prepare to get their ass kicked. I have a lot of baggage myself but that is all family drama, past relationships, abuse, etc. Obviously if this kid is "baggage" to you, you should move on.
I've dated guys with kids before and never thought of them as such. Maybe men see it differently.
I've dated guys with kids before and never thought of them as such. Maybe men see it differently.
First thing I recommend is asking why she has a baby with no partner and what the relationship is like with the father, then go from there.
Here's the deal. Do you like children? If so, do you think you could love a child that was not your own by blood as much as if they were your own by blood? For many this is yes, for many no. If the answer is yes, move forward carefully. If the answer is no, then do not get involved - at all. Certainly nobody is asking you to make the decision here and now whether you want to get married and move into role as "daddy," but if it is out of the question for you down the road - then don't take another step forward. It would be a poor choice to put this girl and her child through that. If marriage and children is a long term goal for you, then why would this situation really be a problem? Just make sure you go into things as a mature adult, because you have an innocent 3rd party involved that you need to make sure doesn't get hurt no matter what the outcome of your relationship. And keep in mind, as a mother, her #1 is supposed to be her child. That has to be ok with you - and actually you should insist on it. Hope that helps.
Here's the deal. Do you like children? If so, do you think you could love a child that was not your own by blood as much as if they were your own by blood? For many this is yes, for many no. If the answer is yes, move forward carefully. If the answer is no, then do not get involved - at all. Certainly nobody is asking you to make the decision here and now whether you want to get married and move into role as "daddy," but if it is out of the question for you down the road - then don't take another step forward. It would be a poor choice to put this girl and her child through that. If marriage and children is a long term goal for you, then why would this situation really be a problem? Just make sure you go into things as a mature adult, because you have an innocent 3rd party involved that you need to make sure doesn't get hurt no matter what the outcome of your relationship. And keep in mind, as a mother, her #1 is supposed to be her child. That has to be ok with you - and actually you should insist on it. Hope that helps.
If so, do you think you could love a child that was not your own by blood as much as if they were your own by blood?
-Possibly, overtime.
now whether you want to get married and move into role as "daddy," but if it is out of the question for you down the road - then don't take another step forward.
- Possibly. Theres no doubt that I can't do "daddy" but honestly I can't see myself marrying or settling at this time [im only 21].
I've recently met this women [a friends girlfriends friend], she's attractive, down to earth.... but she has a one year old kid.
I don't know if I should get more involved. Anyone been in this situation, or have any words of advice? A females perpective would also be appreciated.
Wow, I never knew kids where considered baggage how in the world did this information slip through my fingers :greddy2::bs2: I must remember it next time I fly to check my kids at the baggage claim area before stepping foot on the plane!!!!...
Good lord next time use a different word to get more hits, kids arent baggage theyre little blessings which not everyone has the opportunity to have....