Women's Desires and a Man's Hunger

[Falcon9]

even when there's apathy or anger at the end, the end is still the end of something familiar and that is difficult no matter the nature of the relationship. :biggrin1:

yes, thank you, it is still not easy to be going through this. I am content though with a sense of peace, not just the quiet in my home right now, as I am alone, but also the quiet that has come from finally putting the weight of this frustration on the ground, from laying down all the weapons and realizing there is nothing ever to win or to gain but always we must face loss. It is how we handle this that might be the biggest challenge.

 

[abvavrg]

When my gf and I first started dating, we had sex within a week. Then it didn't happen again except for maybe once every couple weeks on the weekend, maybe, which I found really frustrating. Now we're at different schools and see each other every 2-3 weeks, but we have great sex every day we're together (but no more than that).

I bought her a vibrator, and she told me that she masturbated 3 times yesterday with it.

My point is, 1) horny women are fantastic, and 2) I hope mine is becoming one.

 

[36DD]

It ended. It took a few more conversations but in the end nothing was going to change... certainly not my sex drive. There were other factors, things like relocating because of a job change which only added to the pressure. So, yours truly has now been set free. I understand for some I am a LOT to handle.. but I can't really change my nature. Something worth noting here: some of the conversations I have been having here have been very liberating, in these threads or in pms from members. There is a supportive feeling that comes through very often. (Of course, it is what you make it also. By that I mean when you make an effort to open up and let things fall where they may, it is possible to find some benefit if you allow it.) SO, by having these kinds of messages about intimate subjects and sharing more than just the cock pics, I've really found a good sounding board here. Not to mention some contact from a few of the great women here that leave me breathing a little heavier and HARDER~! btw: WH: I think I was barking up the wrong tree. It is not always easy to realize this and ultimately admit this and then take action.

I'm sorry for your break-up, I know how difficult they can be even when it seems like the right thing to do...but one thing you should know is to never change who you are for anyone...someday you'll meet someone who is right for you and everything will click...I'm sorry if that sounds trivial or insensitive, I don't mean it in that way I just don't know what else to say...I've been there.

 

[madame_zora]

yes, thank you, it is still not easy to be going through this. I am content though with a sense of peace, not just the quiet in my home right now, as I am alone, but also the quiet that has come from finally putting the weight of this frustration on the ground, from laying down all the weapons and realizing there is nothing ever to win or to gain but always we must face loss. It is how we handle this that might be the biggest challenge.

I haven't ventured out of the Etc. threads much lately, but I'm glad I found this thread.

I think sexual compatibility is crucial to a healthy relationship. Wild Honey posted that men and women often view sexuality through different lenses, which is important to note, but if you want sex significantly more than your partner, it's going to cause resentments on both sides. I can't see that as being something that will just work itself out.

For me, not having a full-time relationship, sex is more "catch as catch can", so even thinking about having regular sex several times a day seems like a rare treat I've never had. I don't think I could have the kind of sex I like to have that often, because I like very long sessions that leave me feeling completely exhausted. Maybe that's because I know I have to store up for several days, or longer. It usually takes women longer to get off, so maybe frequent sex isn't as important to us as GOOD sex, which is harder to come by.

Also, there's nothing wrong with masturbation even while you're in a relationship, but I'm not suggesting that as an answer to very unequal needs. Once people start having sex, not because they want it, but just because they're trying to please their partner, I think the handwriting's on the wall. These are good things to talk about when a relationship is new, so you don't get deep into something that has very little chance of providing you with what you need.

Haha, if I was going to fuck a guy three or four times a day for several hours at a time, I wouldn't be able to hold down a job!

 

[ClaireTalon]

<.> Haha, if I was going to fuck a guy three or four times a day for several hours at a time, I wouldn't be able to hold down a job!

That's quite a tempting thought, isn't it? If you'd install three or four webcams around your bedroom and broadcast your sessions on a net pay site, you might not have to work any more. I think for a $ 1 per day membership, you could make some big bucks from that

I have to agree on one thing with you: Such a frequency of sex could wear out a relationship pretty quickly. If you're going at it as often as you can without holding back, the interest would decline faster than normal, and probably you'd part after a few monts; with all those sweet memories of hot sex still on your mind, that might be a bad parting. So let's hold a tight reign on ourselves, and have the good sex around for longer.

 

[bluekarma]

I can pretty get horny pretty much anywhere anytime. Especially there is major chemistry/connection with the person I'm with. Currently I have that, and we have sex as much as possible. Anywhere from 3-4 times a day, again in the night (quickie) and again in the AM. I sometimes get annoyed that he needs a 'recoup' period, because I'm usually extremely horny after he cums, and I see or taste it. Which leads to my wanting it again.

And to the OP, are you single now? I think our sex drives would go together beautifuly.... with a body like that, you wouldn't be coming up for air for weeks....mmm mmm mmm :tongue:

 

[tiff86]

My bf and I have sex basically every night and sometimes in the morning if we have the chance. When we started having sex like 8 or 9 months ago we were having it every day and then for awhile our schedules didn't mix (we don't live together but he stays over a lot) and it was more like 4 or 5 times a week. That wasn't cutting it and now we're back to basically every night. We usually don't have sex like 3 or 4 times in a day but I like long sessions better than quickies so maybe that's why :tongue: . All I know is ever since I started having orgasms I want sex a lot more than I used to. :smile: Sometimes during the day I get distracted cuz I keep thinking about having sex later that night!

I am taking a leap here. I would like to hear from some women on this one. I am curious to know how often intimate sex with your partner is desireable to you. (ok, since this site is about lp's, let's assume you have found a guy with just the right size for you among other desireable man qualities.) Knowing he is a skillful, caring and passionate partner, would twice a day be a lot, 3 or 4 times a day? A couple of times in the evening and then again first thing in the morning? Maybe again later in the day? Could this or something similar be a daily pattern for you? I know there are times when the timing would not be good for either, stresses, monthly cycles, etc... but when everything else is in place, a large comfortable bed, plenty of pillows and soft lighting... could you be as much of a sex animal as I and many others are? The reason I ask and the reason I am out on a limb is that I am being told by my partner that mornings are not so good... it is starting to feel very frustrating... we've already talked about it and I don't think it will change. I am not looking for reassurance about my situation or my cock size (although I always enjoy the comments you've been nice enough to leave for me here), just curious to know what others (the REAL women here) find desirable when it comes to sexual hunger and frequency.

 

[B_Hung Muscle]

HardGuard, it sucks to break up, but you know that being single is far better than being in a mismatched relationship. Sex is one of the most important aspects of a partnership, and shouldn't be relegated as a trivial issue.

In your posts here, you do not mention the gender of your ex. In fact, you seem to go out of your way to avoid pronouns. Everyone assumed your partner was a woman since you posted in "Women's Issues" and solicited women's opinions.

I have seen some of the nastiest break-ups in gay male relationships over mismatched sex drives. One partner cannot understand how his boyfriend cannot share the desire to make love more frequently. I mean, as men, the pressure to be a stud, perpetually horny and ready to fuck, is intense. Insecurity (I'm not attractive), rejection, (he doesn't love me anymore), suspicion (is he getting it elsewhere?) etc -- they all feed into a vicious cycle that is sucked into the vacuum created by the lack of communication.

I hope you all ended your relationship without bitterness.