Worst book you've ever read

[Beef Stroganoff]

The worst book I have ever read? That's a hard one because I usually can find something about any book that makes the experience of reading it worth my time. However, beyond "Queen of The Damned" Anne Rice seems to have decided upon becoming a Queen of The Damned, the damned being anyone who reads the turgid, flowery prose of her later works. In fact, I'd have to say that as a result of reading "Tale of The Body Thief", I look back upon her earlier work with less than fond memories. And her vamped-up depiction of homoerotic lust-going-nowhere leaves me wishing I were straight.

A good book that left me feeling really depressed and, therefor, could be considered a worst is "The Ruins" by Scott Smith. I've read it twice and it has left me really bummed each time. Maybe, I should read it a third time.

 

[invisibleman]

The post regarding The T. Cruise video got me thinking. For the past few years I've kept a list of books that were (for me, at least) a complete waste of my time. For example, I could have spent the time reading them doing something more productive such as ironing shirts or cleaning toilets. My list is short and hasn't changed much since the year 2000.

1. Dianetics (I'll never get those 60 minutes back)

2. The book of mormon (puh-leeeeeze!)

3. The Official J-ELLO Cookbook

Anyone care to offer their worst (wurst) read(s)?

Just asking.:smile:

I read Dianetics as well. L. Ron Hubbard lost me at "homosexuality is an aberration". WTF? But, I read L. Ron Hubbard's Scientology: Fundamentals of Thought. (It is a good thing that I read this one before Dianetics. I would never have found some really cool Jedi Mind tricks.:smile: I am not kidding. I am not a Scientologist though. That doesn't mean I can't find some elements of truth and creativity in things.)

Yeah, The Book of Mormon. LDS-ers lost me at :No gay sex. No str8 sex. No masturbation. No sex at all. No caffeinated products like tea, Coca-Cola and Pepsi-Cola. No alcohol.



There is a book I read last year. I really didn't like because it was a real downer. It is called Perfume. It is about a serial murderer with an acute sense of smell. That book was very, very depressing. I could not get through the novel because it goes into detail of this serial murderer's childhood in Paris, France. (They made a movie recently. Same title as the book.)

The official JELL-O Cookbook.
You are soooo wrong. If you are entertaining, it is es-sential that one know how to make some decent, stylishly edible JELL-O for potlucks, family reunions, lover breakup crises, erotic wrestling matches and the occasional orgies after the Tupperware home parties. :smile:

 

[D_Gunther Snotpole]

Glad to see at least one intellectual here likes Salinger so I can continue to feel I'm missing some obvious genius that others easily mine.

Well, Jace, I don't know if I'd say genius, but a big talent of a moment, fo' sho'.

Don't feel bad, dearie. I like Salinger too. Reading Catcher in the Rye was almost like having Holden Caulfield whisper secrets in your ear.

That's what I found. But his secrets were small beer, literally ... maybe someone drinking in the dorm lavatory, when today, you'd be trying to avoid your crack dealer, who you owed $4200 on your weekly allowance of 80 bucks.

Catcher was one of the worst ever. I never read it in high school or college, but heard about it forever, so a couple of years ago I bought it, read it and hated it.

Aaaagh.

Lord of the Flies by William Golding was the worst one I read in high school.

Now you're talkin', Ital.

In college the worst was A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man by James Joyce.

Aaaaaaaaaagh.
That was one of the few Joyce works I liked ... that, and Dubliners.
Ulysses was still readable enough that I regretted not taking the final swallows, and Finnegan's Wake was absurd nonsense ... surely the most unread 'great book' ever.

Now that I don't have to read, if something doesn't appeal to me after a few chapters, it's history.

My current thinking.
Life is short and there are too many loveable books to waste time on the hair-shirt variety.

 

[D_Gunther Snotpole]

Yeah, The Book of Mormon. LDS-ers lost me at :No gay sex. No str8 sex. No masturbation. No sex at all. No caffeinated products like tea, Coca-Cola and Pepsi-Cola. No alcohol.

And then they bought Coca-Cola and suddenly the caffeine was no problem, if I've got that right.

 

[Northland]

Catcher in the Rye - annoying from start to finish. The only reason I can see for this book being well known is because of it's taboo censored status.

Bless you dear sweet and obviously incredibly intelligent woman! I have been searching for someone else who couldn't stand Catcher In The Rye. I even took another attempt at reading it a few years ago and it still was awful! On an only slightly better note; was, Salinger's Franny and Zooey- I made it more than halfway through that book.


I was also not able to handle Cry The Beloved Country by Alan Paton. The subject matter of Apartheid was definitely worth learning about; however, I found the story to be written in a poor manner which caused utter boredom for me (and a 62 on the test). In all fairness, the majority of our class failed that test.


Of course I do not like to dismiss any book without giving it a second, or even a third chance. In my last year of high school I selected The Way of All Flesh by Samuel Butler for my psychology class. I scanned the pages and hastily wrote a report. At the time, I really didn't care about the Pontifex family or there multi-generational problems. Several years later, I still had a copy on my shelf and took it off and read it. To my surprise it was a delight and I then went on to read other works by Butler.

 

[Not_Punny]

That's what I found. But his secrets were small beer, literally ... maybe someone drinking in the dorm lavatory, when today, you'd be trying to avoid your crack dealer, who you owed $4200 on your weekly allowance of 80 bucks.

Well, it wasn't the size/quality of the character's problems, it was the heart of the character. What was endearing (to me) was how this anti-hero responded with wise-ass humor to constant failure, and the way he valiantly failed again when he pretended to be a "man". Sad but sweet. :redface:
But then, I'm not going to convince anyone who thinks otherwise. Ya love it or ya yawn. :tongue:

= = = = = = = = = = =

Italian1 -- how could you?!! :biggrin1: Lord of the Flies was FABULOUS. I was 11 or 12 when I first read it, and I stayed up all night because I couldn't put it down. A couple of years ago, I even read the entire book out loud to one of my kids. Ha! If you and I are ever stranded on a desert island, I'll pin you down and make you memorize every single literary device employed in that book!!!!

 

[D_Gunther Snotpole]

Well, it wasn't the size/quality of the character's problems, it was the heart of the character. What was endearing (to me) was how this anti-hero responded with wise-ass humor to constant failure, and the way he valiantly failed again when he pretended to be a "man". Sad but sweet. :redface:
But then, I'm not going to convince anyone who thinks otherwise. Ya love it or ya yawn. :tongue:

Oh, but I loved it.
I just don't know if I would love it as much today.
I picked up something by Salinger a year or so ago (can't remember exactly what) and it didn't 'click' for me the way his stuff once did.
Maybe my shorts were too tight that day. Don't know.

 

[B_Italian1]

Aaaaaaaaaagh.
That was one of the few Joyce works I liked ... that, and Dubliners.
Ulysses was still readable enough that I regretted not taking the final swallows, and Finnegan's Wake was absurd nonsense ... surely the most unread 'great book' ever.

After Portrait, Joyce went on my "do not read list", unless a professor required it, and none of them did, thank God.

My current thinking.
Life is short and there are too many loveable books to waste time on the hair-shirt variety.

:smile::smile: I kept Monarch and Cliff notes in business for quite a few years.

Italian1 -- how could you?!! :biggrin1: Lord of the Flies was FABULOUS. I was 11 or 12 when I first read it, and I stayed up all night because I couldn't put it down.

I know you're a milf, but I didn't know you were a masochist. :biggrin1:

A couple of years ago, I even read the entire book out loud to one of my kids.

What a mean and wicked mother you are. You're like Joan Crawford. :wink::tongue:

Ha! If you and I are ever stranded on a desert island, I'll pin you down and make you memorize every single literary device employed in that book!!!!

Island? Did I hear you say island? What island? Clothing optional?

 

[Not_Punny]

:laugh2::laugh2::laugh2: Just you wait, Mr. Italian!!!

 

[invisibleman]

And then they bought Coca-Cola and suddenly the caffeine was no problem, if I've got that right.

Coca-Cola and Pepsi are on their "not Kosher" list of things to imbibe. The Elders I spoke with told me that they couldn't have any caffeinated beverages. They can have Sprite or Sierra Mist. I told them that I didn't have that. I had Pepsi and sweet tea.

 

[SpoiledPrincess]

Lord of the Flies was one of the few books I had to do at school that I enjoyed, Wuthering Heights was probably the worst, why this has become a classic I have no idea, it's practically unintelligeble and full of adults still suffering from teenage angst.

I've just seen Hotmilf mention Jungle Book, the passage where Akela dies is one of the few that had me in tears when I was a kid.

 

[Nekoman]

A Million Little Pieces by James Frey

 

[Not_Punny]

Lord of the Flies was one of the few books I had to do at school that I enjoyed, Wuthering Heights was probably the worst, why this has become a classic I have no idea, it's practically unintelligeble and full of adults still suffering from teenage angst.

I've just seen Hotmilf mention Jungle Book, the passage where Akela dies is one of the few that had me in tears when I was a kid.

I guess that makes me a sniveling idiot, because SOOOOOO many books dissolved me into a wretched state.

God, I loved the original Jungle Book. I love everything by Kipling. :smile:

I stumbled through to the end of Dithering Heights, skipping pages to relieve the tedium. Emily's sister, Charlotte, was by far the better novelist.

 

[Hellboy0]

I've never read a bad book, if they're rubbish I abandon them, there are so many good books I still haven't read that I won't waste my time on a bad one.

Absolutely, exactly what I was going to say. Once the book seems crap (usually within 2 pages), I stop and move on to another!

However, I truly hated my Year 1 Physics course in uni...which came with a real shit text! Does that count?!

 

[SpoiledPrincess]

Unless you have to read it as part of your education, for work purposes or a bet why continue it if it's crap Hellboy, I give it a few more pages, sometimes I'm in doubt after two pages, occasionally I've read a book that was a little slow to start.

 

[D_Gunther Snotpole]

I've just seen Hotmilf mention Jungle Book, the passage where Akela dies is one of the few that had me in tears when I was a kid.

Gotcha, SP.
I've never read a word of Kipling that I didn't love.

 

[lucky8]

my financial accounting book

 

[whatireallywant]

Lord of the Flies was one of the few books I had to do at school that I enjoyed, Wuthering Heights was probably the worst, why this has become a classic I have no idea, it's practically unintelligeble and full of adults still suffering from teenage angst.

I've just seen Hotmilf mention Jungle Book, the passage where Akela dies is one of the few that had me in tears when I was a kid.

I couldn't get past the first chapter of Wuthering Heights. Taking 3 pages just to describe the stuff that is in a room is just way too boring for me to endure reading!

 

[hottcjimmyv]

So many horrible books have already been mentioned.

When I was trying to be erudite in high school, I did my best to enjoy ANYTHING by Thomas Pynchon. I hated his stuff--so bad! I understand why he's a recluse. And then there is Atlas Shrugged-ewwww! Why oh why did I ever go through a Rand phases in 10th grade?

Jesus, I'm a nerd...

Ciao,
Jimmy

 

[2322]

I like Ayn Rand and I liked Atlas Shrugged. I'm unimpressed with Objectivism but I didn't think she was so bad a writer.