Worst sex you've ever had

[Guy-jin]

Youch. She's been reading the shitty sex advice column in Cosmo.

I see what you did there.

 

[959101]

this thread is fun..

 

[693987]

i've never had full blown penetrative sex and I've only fooled around a few times but the little that's happened has been kind of underwhelming

whenever the guy tries to get me off he's there for like 30 minutes and I never even come close to coming =[ I always have to just finish myself off. it kind of makes me think sex isn't worth all the effort when I can just masturbate for like 2 minutes myself and be done with it

Psssst

LADIES please share your stories.

 

[959101]

Psssst

oops.....

 

[693987]

oops.....

No worries

 

[Hassall]

My 2nd wife told me of her only boyfreind who was extremely hung, like 9" he would bend over and drill her from behind for about 30 minutes to an hour even afer sh had dried up, maybe spit on it every once in while and when he climaxed would pull out and splooge on the small of her back then go back to whatever or snort another line of meth. She was trapped with him until there was an opening to get away. Damn I wanted to take him out so bad. Come to find out he got busted for meth dealing with ALOT of it nd sentenced to 30 years. hung or not the guy was a pussy, so guarranteed he got to feel what he had been dong to women all along many, many times over!

 

[Tattooed Goddess]

Why didn't she tell this guy to stop and apply some lube?

 

[Tattooed Goddess]

I also had a guy try to shove his fingers in me without any warm up. He tore me a couple of times trying to dive in before my reflexes pushed his hand away. Dry fingers in a dry vagina is a no no.

Oh same guy would rub my clit super hard and fast right out of the gate and tell me to orgasm for him 5 seconds in. Needless to say I never got there. Turned me off terribly.

 

[Ayecam]

The worst sex i had was with a girl that was drunked af.
we camped in the woods w some friends and we yall smoked some weed.
The first problem was to finde a place that is comfortable, the second was to don't get dirty so we layed our jackets on the grass (it was hell uncomfortable, i felt many stones on my back. The girl was how i said hella drunked she falled so often that we quittet and she just gave me a blowjob.

Sorry for my shitty english haha

 

[Tattooed Goddess]

The worst sex i had was with a girl that was drunked af.
we camped in the woods w some friends and we yall smoked some weed.
The first problem was to finde a place that is comfortable, the second was to don't get dirty so we layed our jackets on the grass (it was hell uncomfortable, i felt many stones on my back. The girl was how i said hella drunked she falled so often that we quittet and she just gave me a blowjob.

Sorry for my shitty english haha

Only ladies get to share their stories in this thread.

 

[rtg]

The worst sex i had was with a girl that was drunked af.
we camped in the woods w some friends and we yall smoked some weed.
The first problem was to finde a place that is comfortable, the second was to don't get dirty so we layed our jackets on the grass (it was hell uncomfortable, i felt many stones on my back. The girl was how i said hella drunked she falled so often that we quittet and she just gave me a blowjob.

Sorry for my shitty english haha

What @Tattooed Goddess said. Plus, that doesn't even sound that bad. Happy to be proven wrong here, but I think bad sex for a woman is much worse in comparison to bad sex for a man.

 

[MickeyLee]

i am so grateful that i have only had sex with one dude, and that he is pretty damn spiffy with the smexing
*lights a candle to the queer gods*

the like the worst sex i had with a woman was boring sex
default vanilla, but it wasn't horrible, ya know?
bad head is nothing compared to a dude using your vag as a pocket pussy
*shudder*

I see what you did there.

you don't post enough!!
*hugs*

 

[AlteredEgo]

I had a friend with benefits. I really liked him. He was smart and serious, but also goofy and fun. Very easy on the eyes, a great kisser. He was in fantastic shape, especially given his sedentary job (chemist) and his bizarre hobby (entomology). We would hang out, play video games take pictures, jabber on about whatever. At some point we'd get handsy and adult sutuations would ensue. The first time we let it escalate to intercourse, I was fairly excited because everything else had been so skillful, especially oral sex. I just wanted to feel his erection all the way inside me, and I had hyped myself up imagining him pushing into me as I had blown him earlier. But he never made it. Halfway into initial penetration, he ejaculated. To his credit, he immediately fingered me to climax. But I wanted him to fuck me. We fooled around some more that morning and that was that. We had one more encounter where we tried to have sex. As he teased me just a little with his erection pressing against my vulva he whispered in my ear, "God, I wanted this from the second I first saw you." As he pressed harder to enter, again he came. That time he immediately went down on me until I came too. We hooked up lots of times but we never tried intercourse again. I wanted to. I figured he must be able to get all the way in at least once. I was willing to keep at it because everything else was good, he was great company, he lived close, and he never left me hanging. But I guess he was too embarassed and afraid to come so quickly again.

A few years later I changed my mind about him. He moved out of town, but invited me to visit any time. I had to be in his part of the state for a few days, and wanted to crash with him because that would be waaay more fun than staying with the elderly relatives I wanted to visit. He said he met someone and they lived together. I was happy for him, and said they could both come to coffee, drinks or dinner with me sometime. Since then, he has made so many sexual overtures, invited me to his hotel every time he travels to my state for business. I congratulated him when I saw his engagement announcement on FaceBook. I figured maybe we could go back to being friends now that he will marry. A few weeks later she went out of town. He called to see if I would let him send for me so we could have one last playdate. You fuckin' kidding me?

How are you going to be the kind of premature ejaculator who can't even get to one full penetration AND can't be faithful? I was so tempted to introduce myself to her and share our texting history and Facebook messages. I just blocked him.

 

[BaronSaber]

Just checking before I make any reply, you're just wanting feedback from the femmes?

What could she possibly have meant by "Ladies"... hmmmmm

 

[AlteredEgo]

What could she possibly have meant by "Ladies"... hmmmmm

Actually, it was a good request for clarification. @Tattooed Goddess responded to him that she wanted stories from ladies only, but that men are quite welcome to comment on those stories.

 

[Tattooed Goddess]

I try to specify if I only want ladies opinions or stories. I rarely mind if a man has something to say in response to something a woman has shared in the thread. What I don't like is when a guy chimes in trying to answer the question aimed at ladies, or try to tell ladies how they should think.

There are some gentlemen that I look forward to seeing their posts here on Women's Issues. Texan Star is one of them.

 

[695092]

Well this thread makes me feel a bit better about myself;p

Although pity for you ladies D:

 

[AlteredEgo]

I went to go watch a friend of mine, a big, sexy computer geek, play in a darts tournament. That's how I learned darts leagues are excuses for drinking. At the time, I was on some kind of health kick, so I was a teatotaling vegan. I drank diet coke with limes like I was never going to need to sleep again. Usually, a night spent with him was very... athletic. He matched me drink for drink, but he had several beers before switching to hard liquor. He seemed sober, until it was time to leave. Oh, my Gawd, he had to talk to every last fucking person we passed. He had to chat up the station agent in the subway. Everyone. Crazy. But he still had excellent coordination and decent reflexes, and his mood was so jolly and playful. I was looking forward to getting into his apartment.

There was a lot of fumbling in the dark. Well-practiced oral was exchanged. We teased each other a long time. He kept trying, as I knew he would, to penetrate me anally, but we couldn't get the angle right. So, I mounted him. We lubed up and were off and running. After a few minutes he started to be kind of lazy. No more toying with my skin and erogenous zones. I leaned down to see his face, and realized he was no longer with me. Naturally, I dismounted and tried to wake him. He would not respond. He had passed out cold. Disappointed and a little embarrassed I got rid of the condom, bathed and dressed us both, masturbated to whatever porn he last watched (some gorgeous Trini angel sodomising herself happily) and tried to sleep knowing I finally had to accept that my favorite playmate was an alcoholic.

In the morning, he asked me what happened. He said he had an ache in his balls and that some leaking from his morning wood was telling him he had not ejaculated the previous night. I told him what transpired, and he actually asked me to make sure to finish him off if he ever blacked out and passed out again. I told him he got boring once he was unconscious. He apologized and made it up to me until he was very, very late for work.

 

[Scarletbegonia]

Dreidel.

You made him out of clay? And with him you did play?

 

[AlteredEgo]

You made him out of clay? And with him you did play?

I'm not taking credit for making that guy. But yes. That was the shape of his small, strange penis.