would you ask a man out on a date?

HiddenLacey

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There was a time in my life I would have said no to this question... but now I agree with Paige. All he can say is yes or no, two answers I can live with.
 

Tactfulgal

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Yes but not often. If I'm into someone I prefer some harmless flirting to move things along and motivate him to ask me out. If the message really seemed to not be getting through I would consider asking him out if I was that interested, but like someone else said it would be something casual like to grab a bite or a drink at the most.
 
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D_Kay_Sarah_Sera

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OK there are two parts to this that I'd need to address in order to be comprehensive!

1. Just personally, I have only asked one guy out in my life. It was in 5th grade. As I recall we didn't go any further than holding hands and kissing on the cheek and passing cutesy little bus-stop notes. (as an aside-I haven't done any more asking because of one reason-solely because of my fear of rejection-and NOT because I have guys like, banging down my door or any nonsense like that lol)

2. Now this is just my opinion, take it or leave it, all opinions on the subjective are right to each invidividual and I respect them as such. I personally don't believe that there are any "shoulds" or "shouldn'ts" to who asks out whom. I think that many men prefer to do the asking, and might be put off by women who ask them out, possibly seeing it as an overly aggressive move, and be thrown off by the typical gender role stereotypical behavior that we usually abide by....it's outside of many men's comfort zones. Just musing here. I think further that women who are ballsy enough to go after what they want-and I do give them props for it-might inadvertently be taking some of the old "thrill of the chase" conundrum. Not always, but sometimes. Alright I've thrown in my two cents, hope I've been somehow useful with my answers =) cheers!
 

Tactfulgal

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Yeah. As I was thinking about it, I've never really come right out and asked a guy out on a date. It's more like if he's not getting the idea, I'll find a way to hang out, like invite him to drinks if I'm already going with a group. There's no risk of rejection, I'm just inviting him to a group thing.
Then there's a point where if he's still not getting the idea, I'll move on.

OK there are two parts to this that I'd need to address in order to be comprehensive!

1. Just personally, I have only asked one guy out in my life. It was in 5th grade. As I recall we didn't go any further than holding hands and kissing on the cheek and passing cutesy little bus-stop notes. (as an aside-I haven't done any more asking because of one reason-solely because of my fear of rejection-and NOT because I have guys like, banging down my door or any nonsense like that lol)

2. Now this is just my opinion, take it or leave it, all opinions on the subjective are right to each invidividual and I respect them as such. I personally don't believe that there are any "shoulds" or "shouldn'ts" to who asks out whom. I think that many men prefer to do the asking, and might be put off by women who ask them out, possibly seeing it as an overly aggressive move, and be thrown off by the typical gender role stereotypical behavior that we usually abide by....it's outside of many men's comfort zones. Just musing here. I think further that women who are ballsy enough to go after what they want-and I do give them props for it-might inadvertently be taking some of the old "thrill of the chase" conundrum. Not always, but sometimes. Alright I've thrown in my two cents, hope I've been somehow useful with my answers =) cheers!
 

Jillang

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I never actually have but in the right circumstance I probably would.
 

paigexox

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I am reading some of these replies, and in my own twisted mind I keep hearing this faint whisper that says "Take what you want, don't just sit and wait for things to come your way". I think that by not taking the initiative, we deny ourselves a lot of pleasure and enjoyment. Body language and "signalling" toward the opposite sex can be clumsy and mis-interpreted. My view is that at my age, if I like the guy enough, I'll just go and ask. It's straight-forward, direct, and ostensibly shows interest without the need to interpret my more subtle actions.

Asking a person out can certainly be a harrowing task, but it's a two-way street. There are numerous guys out there who probably never made a move on me because *they* thought that I wasn't interested in them, or they were intimidated.
 
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fluffychocolate

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Good point. I don't think it is a harrowing experience or anything. I've heard the word no many times in life and I'm alive and quite well afterward. lol So the thought of him saying no doesn't bother me. I feel like if he can't pick up on my signals that I'm interested then we will probably have more miscommunications down the line so maybe I'm not missing out on anything but drama anyway.

I am reading some of these replies, and in my own twisted mind I keep hearing this faint whisper that says "Take what you want, don't just sit and wait for things to come your way". I think that by not taking the initiative, we deny ourselves a lot of pleasure and enjoyment. Body language and "signalling" toward the opposite sex can be clumsy and mis-interpreted. My view is that at my age, if I like the guy enough, I'll just go and ask. It's straight-forward, direct, and ostensibly shows interest without the need to interpret my more subtle actions.

Asking a person out can certainly be a harrowing task, but it's a two-way street. There are numerous guys out there who probably never made a move on me because *they* thought that I wasn't interested in them, or they were intimidated.
 
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693987

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I certainly have and will continue to do so in the future, when I feel the desire to. I see no reason why a woman shouldn't ask another person out. It's not weird, just... less common :3