Would You Be Mad If Your Spouse Recorded You With Out Your Knowledge?

Am I the Asshole?

  • Yes

    Votes: 11 42.3%
  • No

    Votes: 15 57.7%

  • Total voters
    26

Himbo_Hoss

Experimental Member
Joined
Aug 10, 2021
Posts
11
Media
0
Likes
13
Points
3
Location
Steubenville (Ohio, United States)
Sexuality
99% Gay, 1% Straight
Gender
Male
So, I sit in my office alot and 9/10 times I'm wearing clothing. Well when I'm just watching youtube or gaming, My dick is usually in my hand. Not playing with it just in my hand. Little bit goes by and my husband announces to me that "I've been recording you playing with yourself." Instantly I'm pissed off. I tell him that he better delete the video and If I catch him doing it again, I'm snapping his phone. Then he has the balls to ask me "Can I jerk you off?" Number 1 any mood I would have had, I lost it because he was video taping me. I gave him a kiss and told him to leave me alone. He ran off in a huff and is now mad at me.
 

Sagittarius84

Legendary Member
Joined
May 16, 2018
Posts
2,108
Media
0
Likes
2,201
Points
158
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
You aren't the asshole, but I can tell you right now your husband is in his feelings about the whole thing, thinking it was some low key sexy stuff and you're probably going to have to assume the asshole role and validate his unauthorized voyeurism, unfair as it may be.
 

Himbo_Hoss

Experimental Member
Joined
Aug 10, 2021
Posts
11
Media
0
Likes
13
Points
3
Location
Steubenville (Ohio, United States)
Sexuality
99% Gay, 1% Straight
Gender
Male
I actually have an update to this. So yesterday I grabbed his phone with the purpose of deleting the video and it was already gone. Today we had a long chat about boundaries. I don't mind if he watches when I do masturbate, we have an open marriage its not that big of a deal. I set the rule that if he is going to record me doing anything, just ask. If I say yes, then fine, but if I say no, then no. We both removed the passwords from our phones and I told him if he wants to check mine to go ahead and if I want to look at his it is a two way street. (we had passwords on our phones because of the kids around us, open marriage and tons of porn on our phones He had my password I just never felt the need to ask him for his. XD) It also lead to a conversation about where we both are slacking in our relationship and ways we can work together. I also am the type that refuses to go to bed angry so finding out that he deleted it when I told him too was a nice way of seeing he actually cared what I thought.
 

cedarizzo

Superior Member
Joined
Apr 15, 2013
Posts
1,495
Media
34
Likes
6,513
Points
533
Location
Champaign, IL, USA
Sexuality
99% Gay, 1% Straight
Gender
Male
I actually have an update to this. So yesterday I grabbed his phone with the purpose of deleting the video and it was already gone. Today we had a long chat about boundaries. I don't mind if he watches when I do masturbate, we have an open marriage its not that big of a deal. I set the rule that if he is going to record me doing anything, just ask. If I say yes, then fine, but if I say no, then no. We both removed the passwords from our phones and I told him if he wants to check mine to go ahead and if I want to look at his it is a two way street. (we had passwords on our phones because of the kids around us, open marriage and tons of porn on our phones He had my password I just never felt the need to ask him for his. XD) It also lead to a conversation about where we both are slacking in our relationship and ways we can work together. I also am the type that refuses to go to bed angry so finding out that he deleted it when I told him too was a nice way of seeing he actually cared what I thought.
I'm so glad the two of you talked it out. I know I would be pissed off if my partner was secretly video taping me. And I know he would be if that had happened to him. Open and honest communication solves many problems in a relationship.
 

Ms.M

Admired Member
Verified
Gold
Joined
Apr 27, 2021
Posts
198
Media
3
Likes
939
Points
488
Location
United States
Verification
View
Sexuality
69% Straight, 31% Gay
Gender
Female
I actually have an update to this. So yesterday I grabbed his phone with the purpose of deleting the video and it was already gone. Today we had a long chat about boundaries. I don't mind if he watches when I do masturbate, we have an open marriage its not that big of a deal. I set the rule that if he is going to record me doing anything, just ask. If I say yes, then fine, but if I say no, then no. We both removed the passwords from our phones and I told him if he wants to check mine to go ahead and if I want to look at his it is a two way street. (we had passwords on our phones because of the kids around us, open marriage and tons of porn on our phones He had my password I just never felt the need to ask him for his. XD) It also lead to a conversation about where we both are slacking in our relationship and ways we can work together. I also am the type that refuses to go to bed angry so finding out that he deleted it when I told him too was a nice way of seeing he actually cared what I thought.

I'm glad you were able to resolve it!
 

cantaloupe

Expert Member
Joined
Jul 22, 2016
Posts
135
Media
0
Likes
210
Points
133
Location
Germany
Sexuality
90% Gay, 10% Straight
Gender
Male
I'd be pissed too but to me it also sounds like some sexual kick rather then surveillance. So make up and decide if the recording is okay or not and on what terms.
 
1

13810261

Guest
I would be thrilled to death if my spouse took a video of me masturbating without my knowledge - but it would never happen as he has zero sex drive. :pensive:
I have had a couple women video record while having sex. And a gal I was really into. She wanted to try out everything I was ok with. Bondage spanking record her giving me head and close ups of penetration. Don't get me wrong I liked it. U I used to have a big tv in bedroom and watch porn with whomever was there with me. We would watch us and she would tell me what she wanted me to do to get. Turns out this bitch recorded us to make her ez husband jealous. AND DID IT EVER. Mother fucker came to my house. Starting to talk shit. All I said was I had a great time with ur wife.
 
D

deleted5700751

Guest
yes, breach of trust. at least get prior consent even if it's "if i catch you touching yourself can i record it as long as i tell you after?"
 
1

13810261

Guest
Well I asked for permission and wife said sure.