Would You Date A Person That You Don't Find Physically Attractive?

Would you date a guy that you don't find physically attractive?

  • If he is a nice person, yes

  • I would date them in any case

  • Definitely not

  • Not sure, but the physique is important


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Mr.Sanchez1

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Imagine.
You are dating a guy, he is a really great person, he treats you well, he has a great job, interesting hobbies... he is an interesting person.
But physically they are ugly (simply ugly), fat, they don't take care of their physique, their hair, the clothes they use... basically they don't care at all about being handsome for you, for himself or anyone else.

Imagine having sex with this guy. Imagine watching him naked with his fat belly, his boldness and unshaved back. Imagine having to do that while your other gay friends are "pretty" and take care of themselves.
Could you do it? Could you date a guy like this?

This is just an experiment! Kinda bored... :)

PS:
Do an actual exercise to think about it. Don't automatically answer, get yourself in the situation and think about it.
 
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josh20hung

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I agree that I wouldn't want to be with someone who I didn't feel an attraction to. BUT, there have been many times where when I've initially met someone, I found them completely unattractive, and after spending time with them (either as co-workers or friends), I've developed an attraction to them.

There is also another instance with a guy I know. When I met him he had the most incredible body. Amazing abs, big strong arms. Incredibly sexy. Cut to 3-4 years later and he gained a significant amount of weight. When he sat down, his little belly hungover. Still had some muscle in his arms but that is about it. and honestly, I find him still so sexy. His little belly hanging over is something I find so hot. Which I normally don't.
 

stustu

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I could be friends with lots of people, all different shapes and sizes.
But for dating, I would have to be physically attracted to them.
Now, that doesn't mean they have to be "perfect."
They must be clean and well groomed, great sense of humor, loving and kind etc.
 

Golfbuddy

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They wouldn't have to be stunningly handsome or seriously buff. But one thing is a non-starter: no fatties. No beautiful face or big Dick can make up for BMI of 30 or beyond.
 
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Cecil56

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I was maybe 50% attracted to my ex-wife, She had a hot Sister that I was 100% into, but never got into in that manner.

Lesson's learned. Never marry one you are not physically attracted to. Mentally, we got along. I just never had much desire for sex with her. She was and still is a great person. Just not for me.
 

LilJock

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But physically they are ugly (simply ugly), fat, they don't take care of their physique, their hair, the clothes they use... basically they don't care at all about being handsome for you, for himself or anyone else.

Imagine having sex with this guy. Imagine watching him naked with his fat belly, his baldness and unshaved back. Imagine having to do that while your other gay friends are "pretty" and take care of themselves.
Could you do it? Could you date a guy like this?
I answered as though it were the feminine pronoun.

I'll admit to being shallow and usually sought only the most attractive women. However, personality and other intangibles could make up for a lot. The girl I lived with for two years wouldn't be called classically beautiful. She was actually rather boyish, slim hipped, small-breasted (almost flat chested), freckled, with short, curly hair. But there was something very sexy about her. Plus, she was a lot of fun, besides being a fucking genius.* She read classic works all the time in their original languages.

So looks aren't the only qualification. However, a woman described as "simply ugly, fat", who doesn't take care of her body or clothes (forget the baldness and unshaven back), would be definitely disqualified. People who don't take care of their appearance or hygiene obviously don't care about themselves.

Yes, I'm downright shallow. I married a gorgeous woman. Probably would have even if she were only an 8 or a 9. She's endlessly fascinating and my best friend. Plus, she takes care of her body and hygiene. She also spends a fortune on clothes, but she can afford it; she makes a lot of money.



* "Fucking genius" is perhaps a bit misleading. We engaged almost exclusively in oral sex.
 

bigmatt1983

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Imagine.
You are dating a guy, he is a really great person, he treats you well, he has a great job, interesting hobbies... he is an interesting person.
But physically they are ugly (simply ugly), fat, they don't take care of their physique, their hair, the clothes they use... basically they don't care at all about being handsome for you, for himself or anyone else.

Imagine having sex with this guy. Imagine watching him naked with his fat belly, his boldness and unshaved back. Imagine having to do that while your other gay friends are "pretty" and take care of themselves.
Could you do it? Could you date a guy like this?

This is just an experiment! Kinda bored... :)

PS:
Do an actual exercise to think about it. Don't automatically answer, get yourself in the situation and think about it.
Ok first off just tag me next time instead of the description.

I am also a little confused on the not taking care of them selves but also being interesting thing. Are you just referring to not following trends in dressing and grooming or someone with a rats nest where their hair should be and ratty clothes?
 
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firsttimecaller

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I wouldn't waste any woman's time if I didn't find her attractive, that's just fucked up.

Yeah, for this reason I don't get the advice folks give to shy people (I am one) about dating...

Try asking all kinds of people out, not just ones you are attracted to

I get that one needs to practice things in order to improve, but using people you have no physical interest in for this purpose seems like major asshole territory.
 

blabla18p

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Two months after a long relationship ended, I met a guy with whom I dated for 3 months. I didn't find him attractive, to the level I tried to avoid sex and showers (he would always want) with him. When I felt he started to have feelings, I knew I had to cut it.
I feel very bad about these three months, and I should have acted much earlier. I guess I learned.
 

JonSomebody

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I was working two jobs and one of my jobs was a part time bartender at one of the local gay dance clubs in the city at that time. On Sundays...we have pot luck or brunch that was served and donated by a local restaurant and it would also feature Motown music or 70's and 80's disco music. This one Sunday..some of the bartenders had decided to go to a tournament that was being held for the club's bowling team.

I became the life of the party because I was not only really rusty from not bowling in such a long time...but my shoes were slippery and if I did not fall on the floor..the ball went down another lane...and the whole place would just break out in laughter every time it was my turn to bowl. There was this guy who had approached me and offered to give me a refresher tips/advice on bowling. I kid you not..this guy looked just like the cartoon character Homer Simpson and his body was identical to him as well.

I wound up spending a lot of time with him at the bowling lane but also when we got back to the club for food and drinks afterwards. All the bartenders and some of my friends questioned me as to why I was being seen and talking with this guy???..I told them all that he was a nice guy...and he hold a nice conversation ..otherwise good company...nothing sexual. The club owner held a raffle for prizes and this one in particular was for dinner for two at one of the most expensive and well known Italian restaurants in the city. Needless to say...this guy won that prize and he came to me and asked me if I would go to dinner with him later that week.

I then explained to him that if I go...not to expect nothing but good conversation and nothing sexual...otherwise a friendly and platonic evening. If he was okay with that..then I would accept his invite. When my friends and my fellow bartenders found out...they went into an uproar and questioned me as to why would I go out with him...???...I never follow with the crowd and pretty much march to my own drum...nonetheless...the dinner was nice and they opened up the party room because someone was celebrating their birthday and they had karaoke/open mike as well. We did a Hall and Oates song and got a standing ovation...the guy had a really nice voice...We were invited to meet the owner and have some champagne with him and his wife...in other words..the night was really great and I had a lot of fun with Homer...at the end of the night...I did give him a nice kiss on the lips closed mouth and a nice hug to thank him...and that was it for me...but it was fun...
 
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Sagittarius84

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I couldn't, what would be the point? 1st off I have a wide spectrum of female features, body types, weights, etc, that I find attractive so it's saying something if you fall outside that realm.
I cant speak for anyone else but my sexual attraction is based solely upon my perception via the 5 senses, i cant be "charmed" by someone into having sex with them
 

Tight_End_SC

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A date (dinner or maybe drinks) yea, I could perhaps enjoy the interaction. A long term dating scenario with someone who I do not find attractive, NOPE! Not that I am shallow, but you gotta have that physical attraction as part of the equation.