Would you dump a girl that cannot reach orgasm with your dick?

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by metas, Dec 30, 2009.

  1. metas

    metas New Member

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    To me, women orgasm is the present for my cock. And on the other way around, why would a girl fuck me if she cannot get orgasm? Well, sex without your partner(s) orgasm is such a waste for me.

    Well, I may be wrong. But I wouldn't have sex without my partner's orgasm.
     
  2. Preakness

    Preakness Member

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    There are other ways to get there, I guess not?
     
  3. D_Ambrosius Cottonballs

    D_Ambrosius Cottonballs Account Disabled

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    Definitely! Use your imagination. I have never have that issue yet, but I also know there is WAY more ways to get a woman to cum several times without using your cock!
     
  4. Bob Ross

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    I suspect that two of the girls I was with faked them (one more than once)...It certainly put me off but when it happened to me I felt like it was my fault. Actually it was a relationship killer (not the only nail in the coffin though)...But I guess speaking in an idealistic manner, it would not be a deal breaker. If I had a strong relationship with a girl and she just couldn't cum vaginally or orally (the extent of my experience so far) I would not hesitate to go through the motions and find something else that worked.

    If for some reason she was physically incapable of orgasming then I guess I would play it by ear. Something tells me she would feel worse about it than me and if I cared about her I would never dump her just for that.

    So I guess my answer is "no", but if her not orgasming is indicative of the fact that we really dont care about eachother or have any real attraction then "yes", I would.
     
  5. rob_just_rob

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    I've been with women who couldn't cum from fucking, but could cum from oral. And I've been with a woman who couldn't cum noway, nohow.

    I don't think I would break up with a woman solely because she couldn't orgasm from fucking. But that sure isn't a plus.
     
  6. Serial Kisser

    Serial Kisser Well-Known Member

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    Tsk Tsk Tsk. The fragile male ego. If that was the case, I'd never be having sex. Newsflash: A woman's orgasm is not directly related to your cock. There are a ton of other factors: her comfort level, arousal state, whether or not she trusts you, if she's able to relax. There is so much more going on.
     
  7. pussnboots

    pussnboots New Member

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    Maybe you're not quite hitting her spot. Try harder! Not harder, but try other ways to get her off with your dick! LOL
     
  8. metas

    metas New Member

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    No, my current wife has mutiple orgasm. I have no problem with that. But one of my girls in the past had this problem.

    Serial Kisser is right, no orgasm could mean many things. However, if I have to try harder or not in my natural moves to bring a woman heaven, I think sex is not a match. A matching of sex always bring orgasm, I strongly believe in this. Not the ego but the matching for my own sake too.

    Both man and woman need to be natural to be comfortable during sex. If one or another have to try too hard or thinking too systematically about sex all the time, I don't think it is a good sex. And I also believe these would cause no orgasm.

    And I don't like fake orgasm either because I always know it ( except the ONS type).

    I might not dump the girl because of not orgasm with my dick (and oral), but because of the type mismatch.
     
  9. dolfette

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    lots of people enjoy sex just fine without an orgasm.
    just because you see no point in it, doesn't mean she's not having the time of her life.

    someone has already said this. it's about your ego.
     
  10. Markdarcy

    Markdarcy Member

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    Isnt there any other enjoyment in the sex for you? Because if your only enjoyment from sex is the woman orgasming, you realy have to find the right woman. Some women come very easily, others dont. Like dolfette said some women enjoy their sexlife immensly whitout orgasming everytime.
     
  11. D_Catvade Longwick

    D_Catvade Longwick New Member

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    I know girls who enjoy sex without orgasm - I have a feeling that sex is actually often much more pleasurable for women than men in terms of the intensity of the sensations and so it's not so surprising that women may take a lot of pleasure in sex without it been necessary for them to achieve orgasm. As others have mentioned the male need to see the women orgasm is often tied up with his need to assert and confirm his own sense of masculinity. This is probably even more true with a man who sports a larger than average penis because its most likely that he will have tied at least some of his self image to the fact that he is larger than most of his peers, and of course part of this self imagine is also allied to the fact that he likes to image that his extra size makes him more desirable and more sexually potent - which of course isn't really true at all as a large penis is still a penis and as many of the posts on here reflect it may not even be that much of an aid to giving women sexual pleasure.

    I also think the male idea of sex been defined by orgasm is a bit about mastering or owing a woman in sexual sense. It's a sort of displaced misogyny where the man can reduce the women down simply to her sexual organs. The idea been that all a women real wants in life is to receive the orgasms a man can give her, which in turn allows the man discount the far more challenging and complex task of relating to and interacting with her on an emotional level. This is esp challenging for the more priapic men who find emotional disclosure threatening due to the fact that they have to step out from behind the self conceived myth of their own masculinity and be vunerable.
     
  12. dolfette

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    ooooo, i like you!
     
  13. metas

    metas New Member

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    That is why there are still a lot of women out there never know what orgasm is.
    And I don't have to match with all women in the world.
    At least my wife agree with me now and I call it a match.

    I agree that the journey to orgasm is also nice, but the orgasm is the goal and just nicer.
     
  14. metas

    metas New Member

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    We are talking only in the blanket of having sex my friends, not the relationship.
     
  15. D_Catvade Longwick

    D_Catvade Longwick New Member

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    Interestingly there is a clue in the title of the thread "with your dick". Personally I have found sexual chemistry is very different with each women i have been with and that the subtle role play that occurs within the relationship can mean that the sex is also very different. Sometimes sex is very psyhical other times very tender but the context that the sex takes place in changes the likelyhood of her orgasming. Good sex is about 1% sex organs and 99% in the head - if you take the time to figure out what makes her tick mentally then its easy to make help her enjoy and feel fully engaged in the sex.
     
  16. D_Catvade Longwick

    D_Catvade Longwick New Member

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    exactly :smile: as long as you find the right match in terms of personality and sexual compatibility then you are in for great sex. There isn't really a right and wrong on this but I do think while it can be hard for some women to achieve orgasm its probably a nice thing for her if she can get one at least most of the time. I suppose the real trick is for the man to embrace the idea of a sexual partnership rather than the idea of the pleasure of both parties been depending completely on him - and ergo his all defining phallus...
     
  17. nolbaby

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    if there is a feature which you would dump someone for having, you wouldn't have started dating them in the first place. unless of course you suffered a horrible head injury recently, in which case you may not have been able to predict even the completely obvious outcome of dating a person.
     
    #17 nolbaby, Dec 31, 2009
    Last edited: Dec 31, 2009
  18. StrictlyAvg

    StrictlyAvg Member

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    Not a plus, but it all comes down to attitude. Far better to have a game fuck where she doesn't come than a lousy lay where she does imv!
     
  19. nolbaby

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    but good thinking with the dumping thing. if you ever worry that you are on the brink of being dumped... the smartest thing you can do is dump THEM before they have the chance. it sounds childish, but i'd rather be childish and not be humiliated than be an adult and get demoralized.

    besides, i'm tellin you, 1/2 the time, chicks like that will become MORE attracted to you if you break up with them. maybe once she starts talking to your voice mail more often that you, she'll feel like SHE needs to do something more, and maybe SHE needs to become more intimate and interested in YOU, instead of letting you sit around and write depressing ass forum posts about it. and maybe THAT gives her the spark to make a big damp spot on your sheets. or... back seat. whatever. ya know, if you dump her, what do u care if its a back seat or not. be frugal man. hit it in a bathroom stall and see if she starts gushing.

    ok now i'm just recalling my last 4 new year's eves... HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYBODY! BE SAFE! HAVE FUN! NO GUNS! ok guns, be please point UP!
     
  20. Mastur

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    I totally agree with you Tinder, however, I also believe that many women also don't own their own sexuality.
    How many women masturbate? How many really know their bodies sexually, the way men do?
    Apart from Europe (maybe), most of us Westerners were basically reared conservatively. My mother, a very open-minded person herself, regards masturbation as something dirty. Many females in the past have told me that they don't enjoy masturbating, "because, what's the point...?"
    (In other words: sexual stimulation and orgasms is meaningless without the man.)

    Now, I understand the emotion behind that statement, but isn't that kind of general thinking perpetuating the pressure men feel to perform, in order for a woman to achieve orgasms? And therefore, don't women generally expect men to magically know what turns her on, since she might not?

    P.S. Of course with above I mean physiologically and not psychologically...
     
    #20 Mastur, Dec 31, 2009
    Last edited: Dec 31, 2009
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