Would you fuck/date/marry someone with a strong history of cancer in his/her family?

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by ManlyBanisters, Mar 7, 2010.

  1. ManlyBanisters

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    Or heart disease, or senility, or any other genetic and potentially fatal disease/disorder?

    Please see SouthernGirl's thread http://www.lpsg.org/173905-would-you-fuck-date-marry.html for background.

    In that thread a lot of people are saying they'd never marry a fat person because of concerns about longevity and overall fitness as life progresses.

    I'm calling those people on their bullshit. I don't believe for a second that is any kind of a concern for people who just don't fancy fat folk. It's OK - you don't like the look of a fat person - be honest. Don't give us this shit about worrying about their longevity. Nearly every single one of you would happily fuck, date, fall in love with and marry some woman who had lost every single female relative to breast cancer, or some guy who had no relatives over 65 because they'd all died of heart disease.

    I get it - you don't want to appear shallow for not liking the look of fat people so you feel the need to make it about something else. But look at the facts, thin people die every day. People get sick and die of all sorts of stuff.

    Not to mention that fat people sometimes lose weight and, guess what, thin people sometimes put on weight and you end up married to a fatty anyway - what do you do about that, divorce her/him?

    Many of the same people I see posting about the health hazards of being wed to a fatty I also see posting about how hot older people are to them. But surely those folks are going to die sooner too? Why bother with them? :rolleyes:

    Look - I don't like blonde men - I've dated a couple in my time but, really, they just don't do it for me. Is that a shallow, looks based stance? Yes - I admit. Were I on the dating scene I'm sure I'd overlook some good men because of it, but at least I don't pretend that blondes are in some way inferior. They're not.

    Back to health matters. I have a hereditary condition that, no matter how well I look after it, could randomly kill me (low chances but there nonetheless) - I'm also overweight. According to y'all Hick is crazy to marry me. Hick is 18 years older than me and that alone suggests I should think twice about a long term relationship with him. But guess what, I love him - I'll take a chance on having a shorter than average 'til death do us part' with him because he's perfect for me and he makes me happier than I would ever have thought possible.

    Had I rejected Hick based on his age, had he rejected me based on my potential lack of longevity we'd both be missing out on the best relationship, not to mention the best sex, of our lives.

    If you can't have good sex with a person because you're not attracted to him/her due to some physical feature like weight at least have the decency and self belief to be honest about it. Your bullshit is WAY more offensive than your preference.
     
  2. wallyj84

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    I would fuck and date them. Marry, maybe. It would depend on how heavily the cancer thing stayed in my mind.
     
  3. ManlyBanisters

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    Fair enough - and you have the balls to be honest about why you don't do fat chicks, too.
     
  4. silvertriumph2

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    Would I do all those things?

    MB...you are a treasure!

    If I found myself attracted to them...or if I were in love with them.....the answer would
    be a resounding YES!
    Although I have not been in some of those situation as yet, I do not see why it would
    make any difference.
    We all have our various faults, wether they be physical or otherwise...no one comes to
    a relationship without them....
     
  5. ManlyBanisters

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    Exactly. :smile:
     
  6. eyescream

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    I'd have to disagree. I've been placed in that situation before, and a hot guy that I was really into had an inherited disease.

    His father had the disease and his brother did too. I asked him if his son would most likely have the disease and he confirmed it.

    Call me shallow but I couldn't be with him for this specific reason. I'm not strong enough to live with a man who needed to take daily medications and I'm not going to willingly have a son knowing that he will have to spend his life dependent on meds.

    Fat people aren't the most attractive people on the planet but then again, neither are some skinny people. But if being fat is a health risk, that's enough for me not to consider marrying someone.
     
  7. Joll

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    If I loved 'em, yeh.
     
  8. eyescream

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    I also have to add this: being fat is a choice. It's food addiction. It's not like cancer and shouldn't be compared with cancer.
     
  9. ManlyBanisters

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    You were attracted to that guy. Your willingness to act on that changed due to his health circumstances. You are not attracted to fat people. Is that really determined by your concerns about their health?

    Do you not see a difference?

    I disagree that being fat is a choice for 100% of fat people.
     
  10. eyescream

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    I can't choose who I become attracted to. I have been attracted to some fat people in the past. The only difference here is that when I choose not to be with someone who's got an illness, I feel bad.

    When I choose not to be with a fat person, I don't feel half as bad because although most fat people have some kind of emotional issue, I do still associate obesity with greed.

    This might be shortsighted of me, but I don't know a lot of fat people and the only friend I have who is fat tells me she lacks self control when she comes across a bakery (not kidding).

    How so? :confused:
     
  11. D_Ellerby Eatsprick

    D_Ellerby Eatsprick New Member

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    You're a hypocrite. A big fucking one, that is... In the "Would you date a fat girl?"..... I quote you "I would never date or marry a fat woman. It would bring me far too much shame."

    And now you say you would fuck / date and MAYBE marry them.
     
  12. Northland

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    Sex? Sure, why not? (as long as they aren't tubed at the time). It's sex, not a discussion on plate tectonics. If they excite me, it'll probably work out, even if they undress and there's an unexpected wart, I can still focus on what originally took me in.

    Dating? Sure, why not? Cancer, weight, heart disease, Lyme disease, neuromuscular diseases, forms of mental illness (who can say what's really a mental illness? It's all subjective), deafness, blindness, none are reasons to decline a piece of pork or a juicy steak (that'd be my male/female analogy:tongue:) Missing limbs or breasts or missing eye? Love is love, I want them for their brain and soul if I'm dating them.


    Marry? I don't believe in marriage. I have never desired to get married- my nearly forced marriage at 16 to Angie, was not my desire, it was more the demand of her father and her mightly muscular brothers and uncles (and their possible mafia connections, it was Rosebank, and Italian stronghold at the time).

    Marriage aside, I have no problem living with and sharing a home with a person who isn't a GQ or Madmoiselle model or who has an illness which could zap them at any time. So they're diabetic and have dialysis three times a week or a liver which wasn't theirs at birth, what difference does it make if they're the right fit.

    How does a person deal with an adoptee? If they have no family health history, ya gotta go with instinct and if the gut says "Yummy yummy yummy", then you go with it.


    Senile persons need love too, so unless they are already over the edge, I have no problem there.

    In all matters of health, even if the family has a history of diseases, etc. there's always a chance it may skip this person, do you want to miss the chance of happiness?

    (and of course a healthy heredity tree isn't a sure thing- there's always a possibility the genetic code has been carrying a few recessive genes from both parents for 10 generations and now the offspring "wins" the lottery)


    So, when are you and Hick getting wed?
     
    #12 Northland, Mar 7, 2010
    Last edited: Mar 7, 2010
  13. goodwood

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    Nearly every single one of you would happily fuck, date, fall in love with and marry some woman who had lost every single female relative to breast cancer, or some guy who had no relatives over 65 because they'd all died of heart disease.

    Whoa - hold on there MB. That's a big blanket to throw over people you don't really know...
    as far as dating/fucking/marrying someone with a fmaily history of certain physical limitations, first of all we have no control over who we fall in love
    with IMO. so if one is in love with someone, and its a wonderful, healthy relationship then whatever comes will be able to be handled, again imo.

    i wouldn't rule out being with someone based on their family medical history but i do want to think about the health risks that i would passo nto my children and want them to have every benfit of good health that is possible.
     
  14. UncleBob

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    Thank you for this post, ManlyBanisters; it's what I was wanting to say when I went off on a rant on the other thread. I just have to keep telling myself that people who exclude others because of medical conditions are sheltered, ignorant, and bigoted. And, most likely, are very young.
     
  15. UncleBob

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    Eyescream, is it possible that as your only fat friend, this person feels insecure around you, knows that you're judgemental about her size, and is trying to deny her feelings of inadequacy by making a joke about donuts and cake?
     
  16. rob_just_rob

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    I was all set to post a detailed reply, but then realized that you expected me to read one of SouthernGirl's threads. :rolleyes:

    So, in short: Yes.

    We're all dying of something.
     
  17. naughty

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    Workin' up a good pot of mad!
    DO any of us know if when we get into our car tommorrow tht we wont be hit broadside and crippled, left mentally incapacitated, burned beyond recognition or any of the other unfortunate things that could happen? Of course not. But we would hope and pray that someone would still love us and have compassion on our situation. I can understand being afraid of possible disaster to come but no one of us knows how and when it will strike so we just have to live and love our way through it.
     
  18. eyescream

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    Judgmental of her size? I don't talk to her about weight at all. I never tell her to slim down either. If SHE feels insecure about her weight, that is HER problem. The way I see it, I am the one being judged for my preferences.

    What is this...a pity thread? You lot are being hypocritical. This is a large penis support group for crying out loud. Most of us in here have a clear preference when it comes to judging people by their size. How is it okay for me to say "I like big dicks" and not okay for me to say "I might not marry a person because they are fat"?

    Choosing a partner based on their dick size is even more insensitive than discriminating someone because of their weight: one of them you are born with and the other one is acquired.

    I am not fat. I have every right to choose someone with compatible eating habits. I'm certain there are fat people who would never fuck, date nor marry a thin person.
     
  19. B_Hickboy

    B_Hickboy New Member

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    I'll answer that.
     
    #19 B_Hickboy, Mar 7, 2010
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 7, 2010
  20. B_Hickboy

    B_Hickboy New Member

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    That twinge in your intestines
    If they were really slender and good looking the cancer might not matter.
     
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