Would you tell him it's small?

[LemacST]

I wonder what girls think sometimes. It's weird, from certain angles in the mirror my penis looks like a decent size. Not really saying it looks BIG, just good size I guess. Other times though it looks small. I don't know why this happens. I am 6, maybe 6 1/2" at best. Seems like no matter how much information I try to get, there is no way of escaping feeling adequate or inadequate so I just try not to think about it all together.

By the way, I'm 6'2". My 6ish range penis looks much less impressive on my body than it would on a guy of average height, or a shorter guy. I think this comes into play a lot from my perspective...eitherway, I just hope girls aren't under the impression that I have a big dick because I'm kinda tall. lol

 

[LemacST]

yes size does vary from lady to lady.ive personally known ladies who thought a 6x5 cock was huge.all depends on what they're accustomed to.

PLEASE send them my way, LOL.
Just kidding. Honestly, unlike other guys (from what I've read here, at least), if I could choose my cock size I'd want it to be something percieved as nice/"kinda big" by any girls' standards and not HUGE. Call me egocentric, but I think I have other good qualities that I would not want overshadowed by having a huge penis (because face it, that's a strong traight considering the emphasis put on size by society today).


That's basically my issue and my insecurity. I know this is going to sound narcissistic as fuck, but I don't care: I feel like I have an under-rated penis for the rest of my physical qualities. I am tall, dark and handsome...with an extremely average penis. I know I shouldn't take this for granted and that either way I'm still very well off in relations to others, but still. It's not really as much me fantasizing about having a "respecatable" size as it is me concerned that my size is..err.."underwhelming" in comparison and that girls are whispering to others that my dick is "kinda small", or something.

Really though, back to the original post..I look down at my erect penis and imagine how in the hell a girl could find it huge? I am maybe only a bit bigger than 6x5.

 

[D_Ed69s girl]

I think alot of guys do ask there partners about size because she has told him about past partners, or they have seen the huge porno cock. But I feel that regardless of size if he is satisfying you than tell him that his penis is the right size for you and that is all that matters.

So he ask nobody needs to lie about it, Just let him know the truth. If you feel it will come out harsh than find a kinder gentle way to do it. Just don't lie about it that causes more problems.

I have had a few partners that were small and they always did there busiess and never consider me. So I never had to answer that question but trust me I would let them know that they leave me hanging and needed to help me out once in awhile. Part of it was because of their size.

I am fortunate that My husband is a perfect fit, not to big but just right. I don't wish for anything bigger.

 

[4x4]

I know that I'm small and especially thin, about 4 inches around at the widest point so a lady not being able to really feel my dick in them isn't uncommon.

Initially probably because of insecurities, I have always asked similar questions after having had sex with a partner that I cared about but hoping to initiate a dialog to find ways of expanding and improving our sexual relationship. IMO, it has been successful with all except one who was from a very religious background who is very sexual but can not discuss it. All others became more communicative and cooperated in helping me better satisfy them without my penis size being the determining factor. A lot of the time initiating with multiple fingers with the right movements for them during cunnilingus, adding vibrators, sleeves, strap-ons with vibrators, etc. etc.

I've been fortunate, I guess, because once into a relationship I've never felt insecure because of penis size. One night stands are a totally different issue that on occasion have caused quite a bit of grief and related ego issues.

Happy New Year!

 

[B_Jennuine73]

I wouldn't tell him. Unless he was into SPH of course.

*I am married to a man that is 6 inches on a very good day. I have never told him he is small.

 

[viking1]

That's basically my issue and my insecurity. I know this is going to sound narcissistic as fuck, but I don't care: I feel like I have an under-rated penis for the rest of my physical qualities. I am tall, dark and handsome...with an extremely average penis. I know I shouldn't take this for granted and that either way I'm still very well off in relations to others, but still. It's not really as much me fantasizing about having a "respecatable" size as it is me concerned that my size is..err.."underwhelming" in comparison and that girls are whispering to others that my dick is "kinda small", or something.

At least you think you have something going for you. That's good, not
narcissistic. I wish I felt that way...

 

[vibratingfinger]

*I am married to a man that is 6 inches on a very good day. I have never told him he is small.

Hmm...why would you tell him he's small when he's average?

 

[Nekoman]

I think alot of guys do ask there partners about size because she has told him about past partners, or they have seen the huge porno cock. But I feel that regardless of size if he is satisfying you than tell him that his penis is the right size for you and that is all that matters.

So he ask nobody needs to lie about it, Just let him know the truth. If you feel it will come out harsh than find a kinder gentle way to do it. Just don't lie about it that causes more problems.

I have had a few partners that were small and they always did there busiess and never consider me. So I never had to answer that question but trust me I would let them know that they leave me hanging and needed to help me out once in awhile. Part of it was because of their size.

I am fortunate that My husband is a perfect fit, not to big but just right. I don't wish for anything bigger.

When you say they were small, about how small is small -- that's the question alot of guys are wrestling with. When a girl says small, is she comparing it to some huge monster she's had, or to the actual statistical definition of "small."

 

[Nekoman]

Hmm...why would you tell him he's small when he's average?

Great question, I'd like to hear her response..

 

[Nekoman]

Exactly. I still can't see why any man wouldn't know where he ranks.

Well, not everyman is a walking Kinsey survey, has seen tons of porn, or hangs out with naked men with hard-ons.

Additionally, sometimes people want to know where they rank with some specific person, not on some statistical chart.

 

[AlteredEgo]

Some of us here are of the opinion that average is pretty small. Size descriptors small, medium, and large (and the like) are subjective. There is a difference between 'smaller than average' and 'small'. If you have been accustomed to much larger than average, then indeed in your experience average is known to be small. I have argued this point here before (which of us ladies hasn't?) and I do not intend to argue it here today. Let it just be enough that in the opinion of some, average is small. They are entitled to hold that opinion, just as you are entitiled to disagree.

 

[Nekoman]

One way to look at it --

I love large breasts. I think they're way better than small breasts.

My wife has average breasts. They're not what they were before childbirth and nursing.

But I LOVE them. I think her breasts are sooooo hot. They may be smaller than some "ideal size" concept, and less than perky -- but for me they are the perfect tits.

I would never tell her I prefer bigger tits. If it comes up, I just tell her I think she has the hotttest tits around -- that drive me crazy!!

It's all the truth -- and it's all good.

 

[B_superlarge]

I'm always going to go with scientific research. If it wasn't done scientifically it's not much good. I have learned not to believe anything I hear on the street, and only part of what I see. I've had that proven to me too many times. The internet is the same. If there is no science to back up the data, then I dismiss it as false. Self measured surveys mean nothing.
Men will lie, even when they are anonymous. This has been proven.
Just go look at any of the size threads on sites that are mostly teen age guys, and you'll see the evidence of that.

As for enlargement, it's never been proven to me. I won't say it can't work, but I don't have any proof. One thing that makes me doubt is a lot of the guys say they started enlargement at 16 to 19 years old. Natural growth can occur after that age. So, was it what they did, or natural growth?
I don't know, and I'm not sure anyone else does. Another point, why would doctors say it doesn't work if it really does? They could promote this and make millions. I know, some doctors do support it, but most are selling products for enlargement too. I'm just very suspicious of this. I won't say it doesn't work, but I'm certainly not convinced. I'm not convinced on ghosts, flying saucers, or Astrology either. Many others are, but what's that prove?
Just like that thread here "do you believe in God", it ended up about 50/50 which is inconclusive.

I don't know if you are saying you don't believe the currently accepted size from medical studies, or just that I always go with scientific evidence.
I have heard the average at 4, 5, 5.5, 6, 6.5, and 7" so far in my life.
Most of this was off the street. What I have read was factual medical studies that put it at about 5.3". I have actually looked at the names given for the references used, and then looked them up. I have read the actual research papers, and that's why I believe them. You asked me for a list of references, and I said "just forget it". I am not going to look all that stuff up again. I spent hours and hours finding that stuff. I didn't tag any of it.
I didn't need to, I read it, and it's in my brain now. I will also wager, that if I do find it and post it, that it won't change YOUR opinion one bit. It also won't change the opinion of more than .5% of the membership of LPSG in general. That's just the way it is, most people are very closed minded.

It did change my viewpoint, though. If you had asked me 5 years ago what the average penis length was, I'd have said 6.5 to 7", closer to 7". That's what I had heard all the way through school. Now I know it was just adolescent guys wanting everyone else to believe that had 7". I was gullible then, now I'm not so gullible. I'm not closed minded, I just want PROOF! What's wrong with that?

I know the average from studies is about 5.3 (however, those studies don't include black guys). Also, an average is just an average. It's the big guys that cause the insecurity that average and small guys have and those big guys exist. So what that the average size is 5.3 for white guys. Generally speaking, the big guys get around and women usually have sex with many different guys so I for one think more women are accurate when they say they've had a big one. I've read where guys say they think almsot all women are lying or can't judge what big is which I think is a defense mechanism so they won't have to realse that chicks they have sex with have or will probably have a big one go into them. Do the math and her chances of having a 7"er non bone pressed is great and her chance of having an 8"er non bone pressed is good. Plus, if extra size girth and big girths are included as a separate category from length then she will almost certainly have had a big one or an above average one in either length, or girth, or both. So what about average. It's not average that concerns me.

 

[viking1]

First off, AlteredEgo is right. Many women will consider average as small.
Probably most women, or at least most women won't consider it big.
I saw this question on another website: "when did average become the new small"? There is NO answer for that. No honest answer, anyway.

Everything else posted here by the guys is about insecurity, plain, pure, and simple. This not good, but I'm glad I'm not the only one who is right around average, and insecure. Some are above average and insecure. I guess if you aren't at least 8" or more in length, and 6" or more in girth, you will have doubts. You'll always wonder what the women you are with will think, you will lack confidence about your sexual ability. Not much we can do about that.

As far as how you rank with with your friends, or in the locker room, I guess that's just how men are. It's a form of competition, just like who's car is fastest, or who is the strongest. I guess that's just male nature.

Who cares if the studies didn't include black guys? The info on that from factual sources is a best inconclusive. For every jack leg survey that claims blacks are bigger, there's one that claims they aren't. Not enough evidence for me to say that they are at this time.

The only solution is to be happy with what you have, and find a woman who will accept you as you are. Might that be difficult? I don't know?
I do know that I haven't been able to do it. Those suggesting we try some
enlargement techniques. By all means try them, but do it safely.

I don't have the answer, and neither does anyone else. Not here at lpsg, or at measurection, or anywhere. The only answer is to be happy as we with the things that realistic cannot be changed much. That's what therapists, and doctors will tell you. They will also tell that you can find a partner who is compatible, so get busy looking for her, or him.

I will admit that I'll probably never get over my self perception of inadequacy. I'll most likely never have a relationship, and never be happy. I hope the rest of you fare better, and I wish you luck...

 

[vanden_thomas]

My theory on "average" penis size:

So 5.3 by (what is it?)...4.5 is the average? I'm guessing that's from a random sample. What about the average size of of men who actually show their penises to other people? I'm guessing that men with 2x2 penises are much less likely to show them to people than men with average or big penises. So most people won't see the bottom part of the range. They'll only see average and above.

HENCE...the average penis that women might see could be 6, 6.5, 7 inches even if a random sample of the entire population says 5.3.

Now, about insecurity:

I think it comes, not from wondering how average you are but from know what a large penis can do...physically. Forget averages...does it do the job? I know my wife "appreciates" it when slip past her cervix and "probe the depths". If I were a couple of inches shorter, I couldn't do that. I could, therefore, determine that an average penis is small/inadequate. However, I know better. If you asked her what she'd rather give up from our love life: two inches of my penis, the things I say to her that make her hot, the ways I touch her, my attitude, my eyes, my body, etc.; I'm sure she'd give up the inches.

Anyone who is insecure about the size of his penis should realize that the physical sensation is really pretty insignificant (unless you are talking about a size queen who has wrapped it up with psychological meaning). Think about kissing someone you love and kissing someone you despise. One feels amazing and one feels disgusting even if they are physically the same. Similarly, the lesser physical stimulation small cock can cause an orgasm faster than the greater physical stimulation of a large cock because of everything else involved.

I know that my wife would like some extra girth (all else being equal) since the dildo that she chooses when she's alone is bigger than me but given the choice between the dildo and me, she chooses me every time...it's all psychological. When I have used a larger dildo with her (I just like to see it) she's taken longer to reach orgasm than when I am using my own "inferior" penis...all psychological.

Back to the original topic:

Women would be crazy to tell a man, with whom they are in a long term relationship, that he has a small penis...unless, of course, they prefer someone who is not confident in bed. It's not an ego thing. It's simply an awareness of something your partner does/may not like about you that you cannot change. The significance will vary from situation to situation but there will be some effect. Could you imagine if you partner told you, "I like you but you have really ugly hands?" No good could come of it. Do you think you might start to subconsciously (or consciously) to hide your hands from your partner? Unless you want your partner to hide his penis from you, don't tell him there is anything wrong with it.

 

[Drifterwood]

In the words of the great Jo Brand.

"I have noticed that only one thing happens if you tell a penis that it is small. It gets smaller."

 

[B_blackkid]

Exactly. I still can't see why any man wouldn't know where he ranks.

Misconceptions about the truth. I, for the longest time, ranked low regardless of never really being "average" to begin with; I have always been during puberty growing at a higher rate and having a larger penis.

During my Great Pre-occupation alittle over two years ago I thought 7" was actually below average by a half-inch because of what someone told me accompanied by the imaginary sizes of porno-dicks and the fact that someone said Kinsley's data was skewed, in which it is, but still that didn't register until much later that it didn't matter.

Since I've corrected data I'm actually in the 90%-tile; kind of rediculous going from about 40% to 90%, especially because I am, as of now 95% ( 8" ) in length and some obscene percentile in girth, ( 6" ) but a lot of things played into it.

For another during my GP I thought if I could wrap my hand around my dick it was small and any woman would be able to do it; having no experience my spatial capabilities were off and because my hands are as wide as some female's hands due to my being slender; I gave incorrect proportions. My fingers are much much longer than most people's thus my hand size doesn't actually matter; I could barely touch two fingers tip to last segment and figured that was doom and gloom. Twasn't, but I figured as such.

Of course in comes the liar's mentality; pornos depicted, and whilst I wasn't a major viewer my fascination with sex as a new frontier didn't actually need much propaganda to stoke the fires, that the only good dick was a large dick and of course being younger and much dumber I bought into it. Now you have to understand that I can be divided into two parts mentally; one which is skeptical and one which is filled with wonderment; wonderment killed skeptical at the time so the idea of a tool being a foot long on every actor just seemed to amaze me. Of course this is also the leading reason why I am here today; dicks are amazing to me, but not really a sexual turn on so much as one of those science project things. I also listened to my peers constantly, and I guess that too added the extra imaginary dimension for me; I was black, but not black enough, not big enough, not strong enough, not good enough at anything to run with my own "kind". A failure; in part it is true too as I cannot speak ebonics and lack the stereotypical traits of most black people in attitude and physical capabilities measurements. Anywho...

Regardless I found out about PE which was disasterous, attempted to increase my sperm which turned out messy, and overall became so addicted to the idea that I had to grow that I pretty much couldn't accept my cock at all; I hated it.

Time passes with this day in and day out trial including my discovery of LSPG, which I have been actually viewing for a little over a year and a half prior to my actually joining, as well as Thunder'sPlace, and various other websites, and boom!

I got a girlfriend.

Once I got a realistic response I questioned her a bit, being the scientist that I am, and finally settled down with my cock at the grand old age of 18, last quarter. I actually started paying attention to what she was saying and with skepticism having been revived began to pay more attention to other's claims and thinking things through. Suffice to say I "recovered" completely from my own envy, as welll as my hatred for my manbits, and life went on.


So that, Viking, is how one can be so foolish!

 

[naughty]

I wouldn't tell him. Unless he was into SPH of course.

*I am married to a man that is 6 inches on a very good day. I have never told him he is small.

That is because you are a wise and gracious woman. I wish you a long and very happy married life.

 

[AlteredEgo]

Sorry I missed this before, Nekoman.

I find it a little bit disingenuous when people here make comments like this. As if size just didn't matter. So much of what's said here is TOTALLY about size and size alone. Many, many people base hook-ups based solely on size, period. Coming from this site, one should understand the condern I would think.

Not all of thewomen here camehere for big penises. I came here originally to see if my friends at a site about small penises were right about everyone here being assholes. They were wrong, probably just envious. I think if you can look at one of my posts and call it "disingenuous" then you've not read much of what I've had to say.

Perhaps it's just the disingenuous pot calling the kettle black? I find it odd that you start this conversation talking about what a woman might say to a man with whom she's in love, and then the moment I wonder about why size is even a factor at that point you start going on about hook-ups.

Size is certainly not everything, not even close to everything. Even a hard core size queen will tell you (go ahead and ask Deb and NJQT). Even a size queen is concerned with skill. She wants a really big dick, but not on a cluless/unteachable man! Every man, regardless of size, should be asking his lover how good she (or he in some cases) finds the sex to be. Every man should be asking about what can be done to improve the sex they are having. There's almost always something. And guess what? Every woman should be asking too!

Asking abouut size is pointless. If you are already in a loving relationship, worry about your skillset, and keeping things fresh. The woman has already (simply by being with you) accepted your size. If you are not in a loving relationship, then why would you even care? Who is that person to you (and what of their opinions) if you'll barely be seeing them again?

 

[bimmli]

Years ago I had a friend who was married to the most rude woman ever. He must have had a tiny cock because tt every opportunity she would tell EVERYONE how small her husband's cock was. He would just sit there and look embarrassed. When they returned from their honeymoon, she told us that there was a couple they met and she couldn't stop looking at the large bulge in his bathing suit. In front of her husband and his wife she had the audacity to ask him if the bulge was real or if he stuffed his bathing suit!! She was one heck of a Size Queen BEE.
I sometimes wonder if they are still together.