Wtf!!!How do I respond to that.

Principessa

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QFE - Excellent advice from both 36DD & rob_just_rob

I have to disagree with rugbydude88; you should just take it as a compliment, not take advantage of her. She obviously loves and respects you and feels close to you. Don't overreact, she justs sees in you, what she wants in a man. Don't screw up your friendship.

(I'm assuming the 100% gay in your profile means that you aren't interested. Around here, you never know when straight people are actually gay, so I suppose it could work the other way too.)

I would take it as a compliment and ignore it. If she brings it up again, tell her how you feel - i.e. that she is making you uncomfortable and while she is a great friend, you don't see her or any women in that way, etc. In essence, that's how I have handled come-ons from gay men.



 

Icantthinkofaname

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She was just paying you a compliment. Its not like she was trying to subtly hint that she wanted to sleep with you, just say thank you and leave it at that.

I've said things like that to several friends, but I didn't mean to imply anything.

Edit: And I think HazelGod was just joking guys.
 

JustAsking

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Crow,
A really good platonic relationship with a woman is a thing to cherish. If you can really get that down and make it last a long time, you have something rare and valuable.

I one or two very good women friends and at times you would think we were related or something. Even as a hetero male, I wouldn't change that no matter how eager they were.

The beauty of a relationship like that is the recognition (along with a few years of it being true) that there is no sexual tension nor are there any expectations from each other sexually.
 

silvertriumph2

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Crowborne, since you obviously know each other so well, and she certainly knows that you are Gay, I really don't think that she was coming on to you. I think she was just giving you a compliment and letting you know that she feels comfortable with you, enjoys your company, and enjoys cuddling with you.

I am a big cuddler and have some female friends that I occasionally cuddle with while we watch TV, etc. They know that I am BI, but they are also aware that at present I prefer men. I have had them tell me the same thing, but I take it as a compliment...no more.

Stick to you principles and don't ruin a wonderful and loving friendship which could be a lifelong thing.

It it were me I would say.......thanks, I know you mean it as a compliment and I'm pleased, but you know I value our friendship too much to spoil it.

Good Luck, buddy
 

B_Think_Kink

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What do you suggest. " Hmm I feel like having sex with women today" Then I just press a little button in my head and voila completely hetero.

Unfortunately it's just not like that. It actually sends out warning signs to me. I am a girl who is fascinated by having sex with gay men, and I've had the opportunity; and followed through. When a women starts thinking about having sex with someone who is gay, then it might give rise to warning for what she sees in you. There is no switch to be turned off or on, but some gay males posses the ability to become aroused to the point where erection can be maintained and sex can follow suit. I used a technique that seemed to help my friend. We would watch some gay porn with lots of oral and then he would get very horny.. and I'd touch him and he was already semi-hard and ready to go after some simple reassuring on my part. He always told me that I wasn't negatively effecting his orientation.

He was able to complete the act with full vaginal penetration only.
he is completely gay though, he does not think there is any way he could be attracted to a girl anymore.

What I'm trying to say is, if you feel that you want to step out of that friend box and try something a little bit wild, then you may do so. It might taking something a little out of your normal method, but it can be done. Remember though, girls hold different attachments to sex then guys do. So while you can sit next to her and see her like your best friend again right after, she might really enjoy what you potentially share.

I really just think unless you're ready to possibly loose a best friend, or make it really awkward between you two then you may want to hold off on sharing something as intimate as sex together.
 

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(I'm assuming the 100% gay in your profile means that you aren't interested. Around here, you never know when straight people are actually gay, so I suppose it could work the other way too.)

I would take it as a compliment and ignore it. If she brings it up again, tell her how you feel - i.e. that she is making you uncomfortable and while she is a great friend, you don't see her or any women in that way, etc. In essence, that's how I have handled come-ons from gay men.

As always Rob, good advice, but the OP didn't necessarily say it made him uncomfortable. I take from the statement that he feels compelled to compensate her for the comment. Still a rough spot to be in.

36DD and robjustrob make good points (and sense).

There is nothing like cuddling up with a platonic friend and feeling close. Madame Zora and I were cuddled on the couch while we chatted and took pics.

You should, however, have enough faith in your friendship and enough love and respect for both of you to draw the line when you begin to feel uncomfortable.

Listen to Lex, he has this spot on. I have two LTR lesbian friends that we are really close. many a night we woud go drinking and we would all fall (platonically) into bed and ften wake up snuggled together. Cuddling up during movies. It is just how some gay/straight relationships work. Because you don't have that "oh my God what if they think I am making a move" thing hanging over your head, you can tend to be more uninhibited about your affection level. I know I am.

Do as I do when someone propositions you, and you can't respond eroticly: "Thank you."

And tell them you think they're very nice and it was flattering and I wish we could, in some way be nice to one aother.

Don't whip your schlong out. I'd wager that's not what the conversation was about anyway. People can own up to a fantasy, if not the whole package.

Excellent advice and let her know how flattered you are in a paltonic way.
 

Novaboy

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I have had several conversations with straight female friends who have a number of gay friends. They have all expressed at some point that they get along so much better with gay men than straight men. One told me that she wants a gay man that likes having sex with women!? It does and it doesn't make sense. I explained to her that if I or some other gay man of her desires was straight perhaps I / he would then not possess the qualities she was attracted too. There was a Seinfeld episode in which Elaine "converted" a gay guy. Until he switched back she said it was the best relationship she had ever had...."Nothing but sex and shopping"

Novaboy
 

B_Nick4444

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This is one of the most irresponsible things I have read on here in some time. You should absolutely turn down sex from someone in whom you have no interest (or whenever you are not feeling in the mood). I mean, have a little self respect and dignity, not to mention health respect for STDs. Yes, you can catch diseases from getting your dick sucked.

Just like a cigar is sometimes just a cigar, sex is sometimes just sex ... On this one I'm with RugbyDude, if it doesn't gross him out to have a woman down there (it would me) he should get the BJ ...

On the other hand, a cuddle suggests affection, so then I'm with Lex ...

In other words, I don't know
 

Osiris

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Unfortunately it's just not like that. It actually sends out warning signs to me. I am a girl who is fascinated by having sex with gay men, and I've had the opportunity; and followed through. When a women starts thinking about having sex with someone who is gay, then it might give rise to warning for what she sees in you. There is no switch to be turned off or on, but some gay males posses the ability to become aroused to the point where erection can be maintained and sex can follow suit. I used a technique that seemed to help my friend. We would watch some gay porn with lots of oral and then he would get very horny.. and I'd touch him and he was already semi-hard and ready to go after some simple reassuring on my part. He always told me that I wasn't negatively effecting his orientation.

He was able to complete the act with full vaginal penetration only.
he is completely gay though, he does not think there is any way he could be attracted to a girl anymore.

What I'm trying to say is, if you feel that you want to step out of that friend box and try something a little bit wild, then you may do so. It might taking something a little out of your normal method, but it can be done. Remember though, girls hold different attachments to sex then guys do. So while you can sit next to her and see her like your best friend again right after, she might really enjoy what you potentially share.

I really just think unless you're ready to possibly loose a best friend, or make it really awkward between you two then you may want to hold off on sharing something as intimate as sex together.

Excellent insight. I think that you are the best equipped to answer this. I totally forgot that fact about you being attracted to your gay friend.

So what would be your take if it was "just sex"? Do you think that is possible or is it a done deal based on her statement that she wants more?
 

B_Think_Kink

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I have had several conversations with straight female friends who have a number of gay friends. They have all expressed at some point that they get along so much better with gay men than straight men. One told me that she wants a gay man that likes having sex with women!? It does and it doesn't make sense. I explained to her that if I or some other gay man of her desires was straight perhaps I / he would then not possess the qualities she was attracted too. There was a Seinfeld episode in which Elaine "converted" a gay guy. Until he switched back she said it was the best relationship she had ever had...."Nothing but sex and shopping"

Novaboy
Yeah I think life would be better if gay guys married girls too... they are so much more attractive.
Excellent insight. I think that you are the best equipped to answer this. I totally forgot that fact about you being attracted to your gay friend.

So what would be your take if it was "just sex"? Do you think that is possible or is it a done deal based on her statement that she wants more?
I really lack the ability to think it would be possible. Women see things differently and we want different things from sexual relationships than a gay individual would. I think her blatant statement to him about wishing he was straight is a warning sign. She's already seen how perfectly compatible they are as a couple, because there is a strong bond between gay individuals and females. Stereotypically but more often than not, they like to shop, they dress well, are very well mannered, gentle, good listeners and are every girls dream guy. But sex is something totally different, gay males and females may be compatible in all other forms but sex is something totally different. Without liking the same sex, all those other qualities wouldn't allow these two people to be so close. I'm not saying sex is impossible, I'm just thinking that it's impossible to hold a friendship like that. I could see a girl falling into "omg this is so perfect, finally someone who totally enjoys me for me and now we also share something sexually" trap.

I can see it as you know two people who are very close friends who want to share something, but usually it's the guy who starts that ball rolling, in an experiment if he's never had a girl partner before. But adding in the OP's replies and what he's said his friend has said.. this is better left untouched.