You dirty homophones!

[Calboner]

Two expressions are homophones just in case they are distinct in derivation but identical in pronunciation. Pronouns and contractions present many homophone pairs, such as "its" and "it's," "who's" and "whose," "your" and "you're," and "there" and "their," all of which are subject to frequent confusion. What are more notable are homophones that give rise to substantive misunderstanding--not mere confusions of spelling or punctuation but a failure to understand the words that one is using. Examples:

• pore, v.i. You don't pour (v.t.) over a book, unless there is some liquid that you are pouring over it: to study a book attentively is to pore over it.
  
  
• toe the line: you might "tow a line" if you are fishing, but to fall into conformity with a policy or a standing order is to toe the line, as when soldiers stand abreast with their toes at a line.

I know I had some other examples in mind but I can't think of them right now.

 

[B_Hickboy]

Its not important if you don't care about it's origin. Their are many people who can't keep they're apostrophe's straight and your just lucky your not one of them. Their, I've said it.

 

[Calboner]

10 Words You Need to Stop Misspelling - The Oatmeal

 

[B_Hickboy]

Oh yeah? Take this: Apostrophe - Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

 

[maxcok]

Here, here! I cannot bare misappropriated homophones.

Does that mean I'm homophoniphobic?

 

[B_Hickboy]

BTW, I think that Cal, Maxcok, Nudey, Hhuck, Bbucko, and ManlyBanisters and I may be the only people on the board, perhaps in the whole fucking world, who give a shit one way or the other about this particular subject.

 

[Calboner]

BTW, I think that Cal, Maxcok, Nudey, Hhuck, Bbucko, and ManlyBanisters and I may be the only people on the board, perhaps in the whole fucking world, who give a shit one way or the other about this particular subject.

Well, the LPSG group "I Judge You When You Use Bad Grammar" lists 44 members besides me.

 

[Calboner]

Oh yeah? Take this: Apostrophe - Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

The apostrophe is a simple quotation mark. It's usage rule's remain a mystery to mos't, bu't here are some suggestion's:

• Use one to show plural's (You have two cow's.)
• Use one in the middle of pronoun's (The dog is her's.)
• Use one in verb's (Bobs dog overeat's.)
• Use one in fron't of s'es, to warn the reader's eye that an s is coming up ('She goe's to the 'store to get apple's)
• Also use one between t's at the end's of word's (I wan't tha't one)
• Occasionally use them before d's on end's of word's (I followe'd him to where he work's)
• Use one at the end of any word to show the speaker is a genius (I's fixin' to be goin' to the sto'.)
• Use one after numbers' with no exceptions (I have two' cows, The 80's were a great decade, 1' + 3' = 4')
• Use several to indicate the speaker is an alien ("Kh'aaa'rr'ghh," said Ted Stevens.)
• To indicate the 'speaker i's Iri'sh (O'Reilly eat's potatoe's)
• Surround tex't with double apostrophe's to provide emphasis, especially on a sign ("Fresh" Fish!, "Cheap" Price's!)

 

[B_Hickboy]

Well, the LPSG group "I Judge You When You Use Bad Grammar" lists 44 members besides me.

I'm a little heartbroken that I wasn't invited.

 

[Calboner]

I'm a little heartbroken that I wasn't invited.

Neither was I--at least, I don't remember being invited. I think I just happened upon it and signed up.

 

[B_Hickboy]

Neither was I--at least, I don't remember being invited. I think I just happened upon it and signed up.

Oh, well, in that case...

 

[Drifterwood]

I'll keep in tow and toe the party line, be up to scratch and step up to the mark, but toeing the crack would have been more interesting.

 

[nudeyorker]

Its not important if you don't care about it's origin. Their are many people who can't keep they're apostrophe's straight and your just lucky your not one of them. Their, I've said it.

BTW, I think that Cal, Maxcok, Nudey, Hhuck, Bbucko, and ManlyBanisters and I may be the only people on the board, perhaps in the whole fucking world, who give a shit one way or the other about this particular subject.

I think you are right!

I'm a little heartbroken that I wasn't invited.

I'm a little heartbroken too but I'll just have another glass of whine and wine about it to my other half and I'll survive I think!

 

[Drifterwood]

I'll just have another glass of whine and wine about it to my other half and I'll survive I think!

Bet its a Peenoh.

 

[nudeyorker]

Bet its a Peenoh.

It's referred to as Penis Noir in our home!

 

[maxcok]

BTW, I think that Cal, Maxcok, Nudey, Hhuck, Bbucko, and ManlyBanisters and I may be the only people on the board, perhaps in the whole fucking world, who give a shit one way or the other about this particular subject.

I prey that's not true, but it sure seams that way sometimes.

Than again, what do I no?

 

[B_Hickboy]

Theirs no whey you can no it awl.

 

[Drifterwood]

It's referred to as Penis Noir in our home!

Noir, blanc, blush; you can take your pick.

 

[MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK]

BTW, I think that Cal, Maxcok, Nudey, Hhuck, Bbucko, and ManlyBanisters and I may be the only people on the board, perhaps in the whole fucking world, who give a shit one way or the other about this particular subject.

Actually, so do I too there, Hick.

 

[Calboner]

Theirs no whey you can no it awl.

Eye dew* knot like you're righting.

*I know this is not a homophone with "do" in all varieties of English, but neither is "whey" with "way."