You knew it was coming...ask a "gay" black man anything.

yngjock20

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Okay, so I know Mista Geechee already covered the straight black man side, but I'm gonna field questions for those who've always wondered about the odd life of the gay black man.

Oh, and if he wants to, I openly invite Mr. Marleyisalegend to throw his two cents (or two dollars) worth in at any time.
 

marleyisalegend

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Here's my first question. Have you ever had a gay "friend" try to take your man? It seems epidemic in the gay community (though I'm sure heteros deal with the same bullshit), atleast where I live, that there are no boundaries or rules to sex and dating and men who are already taken seem like a delicacy while single guys wade around the bar ever lonely.
 
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yngjock20

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Here's my first question. Have you ever had a gay "friend" try to take your man?

...and how! A friend of mine calls those types "vultures." They hover around and hover around, just waiting for you to turn your back and then SWOOP! They're all on your man like flies on a Somolian.

...men who are already taken seem like a delicacy while single guys wade around the bar ever lonely.

You know that there are guys out there who's mission is to bag a "married man." It seems as though they're chasing the thrill of the taboo rather than the actual relationship. This kind of thing is too prevalent in the gay community, but it's also big on the straight side.
 

yngjock20

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Hello Mr Gay black man, what do you think is the main difference between a gay black man and a black gay man ?

Well, there's no intial difference. However, when eating dinner with the two; you'll notice that a gay black man will hold his salad fork upright while a black gay man will calmly shovel the salad into his mouth sans utensils.


I hope that helped you.
 

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Maybe it's just the areas in which I have lived, but gay, black men seem to be mostly "flamers." Is this true everywhere? Are there really fewer "butch" or "straight acting" gay, black men? You would think I would have at least seen some in the gay bars but I haven't. :confused:
 

yngjock20

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Maybe it's just the areas in which I have lived, but gay, black men seem to be mostly "flamers." Is this true everywhere? Are there really fewer "butch" or "straight acting" gay, black men? You would think I would have at least seen some in the gay bars but I haven't. :confused:

Good question.

The default gay black man setting is "QUEEN," however, gay black men do run the gammut when it comes to character types.

Personally, I think it has alot to do with the gay society depiction along with the influences gay black men see. The forced need to be masculine in the black community inadvertently creates this ubber feminine juxtaposition that many like to ignore like a mold spot on a ceiling. The strength and delicateness exhibited by Patti, Diana and many of the hometown "divas" is something revered by those who don't feel comfortable being the masculine male that raised (or should've raised) them.

The arguement of it being a reaction to the lack of a paternal role in the house is somewhat valid, but I've seen many cases of men who come out girls regardless of there being a man in the house.
 

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hi, Mr. Gay Black Man:

About the whole DL thing; have you noticed that it's the majority and not the minority of men who lead secret lives?
 

marleyisalegend

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hi, Mr. Gay Black Man:

About the whole DL thing; have you noticed that it's the majority and not the minority of men who lead secret lives?

That's a tough question and it sort of answers itself (though erroneously). It's based on the idea that:

FACT (according to you) most gay men are DL, then it asks why.

Neither of us know if they're the majority, if you assume so, you have some issues with the gay community you need to work out. I'm not defending the behavior, I think it's deplorable and I won't get into the stds that get spread, but I don't understand the assumption that DL men are the majority.
 

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That's a tough question and it sort of answers itself (though erroneously). It's based on the idea that:

FACT (according to you) most gay men are DL, then it asks why.

Neither of us know if they're the majority, if you assume so, you have some issues with the gay community you need to work out. I'm not defending the behavior, I think it's deplorable and I won't get into the stds that get spread, but I don't understand the assumption that DL men are the majority.


I guess my question was unclear...forget I asked...

and I don't have any issues w/ the gay community...
 

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Okay, so I know Mista Geechee already covered the straight black man side, but I'm gonna field questions for those who've always wondered about the odd life of the gay black man.

Oh, and if he wants to, I openly invite Mr. Marleyisalegend to throw his two cents (or two dollars) worth in at any time.
Ok here goes. Are all gay black men as cool as you are?:smile:
 

yngjock20

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hi, Mr. Gay Black Man:

About the whole DL thing; have you noticed that it's the majority and not the minority of men who lead secret lives?

Well, that's a kind of tricky question. At some point in their lives, most gay men of all nationalities have been secretive about their sexuality. Hiding from parents or friends or coworkers in fear of rejection. However, the black community has spawned the particular "DL" breed of gay man who lives with the secret almost until death. Alot of the black gay cultural idiosyncracies(sp?) are birthed from the fact that we're so unaccepting of anything not "normal." That's why I believe it's so prevalent in the urban community.

Ok here goes. Are all gay black men as cool as you are?:smile:

There are a few, but I do believe we're all different types of "cool." I myself am the Mid-modern pseudo-gay satirical bon-vivant type. Not sure how many others are out there like me, though.

HELL naw! Jock is one flavor of gay black men, there are many who are far less intelligent, well-spoken, aware, and bitter. He does represent like a motherfucker.

Oh, wow. That was prolly the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me on here. I'm glad I came to understand you because I would have missed out on another dude as cool (albeit strong-willed) as myself. LOL!!!
 

marleyisalegend

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Oh, wow. That was prolly the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me on here. I'm glad I came to understand you because I would have missed out on another dude as cool (albeit strong-willed) as myself. LOL!!!

LOL, I know whatcha mean. There's only so much room for being bold, and being gay AND black is two strikes against you. Being outspoken along with being gay and/or black offends some people. They's just want us to be's quiet but I's gon' tell ya one thing. I may be po'....I may be black....Hell, I might even be fag... but I'm here!!!
 
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