Young, Confused....but Confident

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by necro86171, Oct 21, 2005.

  1. necro86171

    necro86171 New Member

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    Hello all. I am a long time reader here...this is actually my second post (old user name got deleted do to dormancy, lol). I will warn that this is going to be a long post, so if you are looking for a quicke don't look here.

    I realize this is a group for large penises, and technically I don't fit that description (6.5x5 if you're curious) but I feel that there are alot of intelligent people on this board and that it is as good a place as any to ask my question. First some background: I am quite young (19) and in college (University of Michigan). I do not consider myself to be a typical student or 19 year old for that matter. I do not like parties, or the typical club scene that most of my peers seem to crave. I am a virgin (I am told a rare find these days, more on this later), and I enjoy things that many in my age group view as being boring or not worth their time (classical music, quality wines, fine cigars- of course in moderation due to $$$ or lack of). I have found this to be somewhat of a problem in the social areana, I do have friends but they are difficult to come by.

    For the most part I am happy with my life. I get excellent grades, I have a family that loves and supports me, I know what I want to do once I graduate (law), I have hobbies that I enjoy (wieghtlifting, reading, tutoring, public speaking), and I have a loyal circle of friends that I care about. I really don't have much to complain about in the longterm.

    However, I am truely conflicted on the issue of my sexuality. Not in the traditional sense mind you (see sig) I know I am attracted to women. As I said, I am a virgin, but I have a VERY high sex drive (we're talking 5+ jerk offs everday, I really don't know how I find the time to maintain my GPA). I have reached the point where I really want and am inetersted in sex with a woman, the problem is I cannot stomach the idea of an ONS (I am attracted to women on a more intellectual and emotional basis anyway, ONS is about purely pyshical attraction)... yet I wonder if a) I have the time for an RL, b) if I could even find a girl to engage in one with, and c) if it is worth it at this point in my life. I guess what I am asking is, what are your experiances in this realm (especially more mature posters) and do you have any advice for me in this area, do you think it is even a good idea for me to focus on soemthing like this now? My main worry is that I will look back on my youth years from now and regret that I essentially sat out on the sidelines. I admittadly have ambitious goals (I want to go to Harvard Law School or the equivilant) and can't see changing them anytime soon. Finding the time for an Rl will be difficult, though not impossiable. Do you think it would hurt me later to wait it out now is essentially what I am asking. Also, do you think I am right to think that an ONS would be disasterous for an individual like me? I am happy to give more information if desired, and I appreciate you guys taking time to advise the young and foolish.
     
  2. Chocolatestix

    Chocolatestix Member

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    Well, first of all if it makes you feel any better I'm 19 and I'm a virgin. I too don't like going to clubs and drinking. I also am attracted to women intellectually. And I want to go to law school too, not Havard though. I am going throught the exact same process as you (minus the j/o 5 times in one day). I am looking for a girlfriend. In college I have noticed they are really helpful. I'm not saying I want one to just use her to get me through school but they really can give you moral support and just really know how to stroke you ego. So when you think you have found the right girl go for it. I think you will regret in the end if you don't.
     
  3. Knight

    Knight New Member

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    I lost my virginity when I was 19. Jacking off three times a day gave me confidence in my sexual ability; I knew I wouldn't be a minute man. Getting a girlfriend isn't hard, it just happens. See if some girls are interested, they either touch you or one of their mates will shout out 'Paul! [My Mate] fancies you!' etc. I have a few people staring at my crotch too, I don't like that anymore lol there's two flatmates who do it ALL the time.

    Anyway good luck, and the 'magic' happens when you least expect it. Wow that's so corny, I feel I need to go shower :p

    If you at least act like you dont want it or don't go out specifically looking for it, you'll find what you're looking for.

    As for the nightclubs and drinking, I met my current girlfriend in a club, and after some gyration and grinding, I went back to her flat and got her number and we've been on a lot of dates in two weeks (well three, but that's a lot cos we have uni to attend). I don't really like nightclubs or drinking either, but it is fun if you go, force yourself lol.

    I'm stopping drinking (so much, and drinking lager though) because well I need to save money and also I don't like the taste of lager anymore. It tastes like shit. From now on I'll drink vodka and a mixer (lemonade). It's cheap here, 1 pound a time. (=$2)

    You could just drink a few of those and get 'merry' or tipsy although it is a good thing that you don't drink, a good character trait. Some girl will really dig you, you just have to find her. Good luck.
     
  4. DC_DEEP

    Gold Member

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    You have to be true to yourself. If you find a one-night stand to be repugnant, be sure you don't find yourself in a weak moment and an opportune situation, and do something you may regret.

    On the other hand, a relationship can be a good thing, but they really do take time and energy to be healthy, and a pre-law curriculum may not offer the best environment for that.

    Don't jump into a committment. If you meet up with a young woman who shares a lot of your interests and goals, date her for a while - but be honest about your thoughts and ideals and limits. Don't be afraid to keep your virginity because of what "people might think..."

    Bottom line, what you decide, only you can decide. Make sure you do it for the right reasons, and you will be happy with your decisions for the rest of your life.
     
  5. Dr Rock

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    who lives in the east 'neath the willow tree? Sex
    holy shit. thank you so much; that was easily the funniest thing I've read in MONTHS. I'm gonna be tittering like a loon over that for the rest of the day. :headbang:
     
  6. GoneA

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    Your confused but confident?
     
  7. Pene_Negro_Grande

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    You seem to have a lot of hobbies already so finding time to spend with a lady friend shouldn't be a problem....I guarantee once you find a chick - you will lose some of your hobbies and she will become one of them....If you like intellilectual chicks - go and hang out in places like that....You local bookstore with a starbucks is great for those types and I agree with Knight that it just happens....But a something to look out for is you need to pay more attention to your surroundings....If you kind of look around and people watch - you can notice if a person is interested in you by as much eye contact as they make your way....Don't worry about being a virgin at 19 - a lot of girls find that sexy especially if they are a little more experienced because they think they can mold you the way they want....Enjoy being young - I do....
     
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