Young Guys seeking Older men

[green200]

I have a problem. Maybe you guys can help me.

There are two guys I've met over the last year with whom I've become friends. One is an Asian guy, 22 years old, much more bottom than top. The other is a black guy, originally from Liberia but living here. He's 20 and all top and i have to say, an incredible lover. Both are looking for LTR - like move in, settle down LTR. I'm 56 and my last bf was 20 when we met and that lasted almost 5 years. I tried to avoid that situation at first because he was inexperienced and I figured that at some point he'd want to explore things. That's exactly what happened. About a year before we broke up he got got on line and started hooking up with other guys. I found out when he actually spent a weekend away with a guy.

Anyway, I'm even more hesitant now to do this again. What do you guys think? I've tried talking to them about being open to an open type relationship but neither one of them are interested. They're not looking for any hand outs or financial help. The Asian guy is about to graduate with his MBA in sport sciences and the black guy is in school and working in retail.

I'm not sure what to do.

If neither of them are looking for the same thing that you want right now, I'd say you should keep it as just friends with both of them. You don't want to put yourself or either of them in a situation that's less than satisfying, right? If that's not an option, then from what little info I have to go on, I'd go with the Asian guy because you may find it easier to date someone who's already graduated and done with school... or at least I would.

 

[B_smooth_7]

If neither of them are looking for the same thing that you want right now, I'd say you should keep it as just friends with both of them. You don't want to put yourself or either of them in a situation that's less than satisfying, right? If that's not an option, then from what little info I have to go on, I'd go with the Asian guy because you may find it easier to date someone who's already graduated and done with school... or at least I would.

The Asian guy is sooo nice. But here are a few things about him I didn't mention.

First, he's uncut and I'm not big into uncut guys. I can accept it as I lived in Central Europe and my BF of 5 years was uncut.

The very first time we had sex I topped him. After a few minutes I could smell poop. I pulled out and it was EVERYWHERE! I peeled off the condom and went to the shower. He did NOTHING. He just laid there. I got back into bed and he wanted more but I said no. I realized he still had shit on him. I pulled him out of the bed and took him to the shower and washed him. I learned later that his ex was into that so he figured everyone must be into it.

And lastly, I prefer being bottom. I can top, no problem but I can't be anything near 100% top. And he prefers being bottom.

 

[silveryoda]

Well im new to this forum, I havnt read all this thread but I am56 and gay (*I was married for 26 yrs but want being true to myself!...another story!). I met my now partner just over 6 yrs ago when he was 23 and engaged to a girl. We met on a specialist gay website in the UK called silverdaddies, we settled down to live together as partners about 3 years ago having had twice weekly meetings before that. We love each other, sex is still amazing, we both give and take!....I like to feel he keeps me young. its great!!
The website along with several others is all about meeting guys that crosss age borders. I am also a bear (V hairy all over) which he also is into.
John

 

[AlexDB9]

I'm newly single at 44. The first guy I...um...dated was a 20something model/actor/writer/director/producer. Most beautiful guy I've ever been with. He could have anyone he wanted and was totally into me. I thought it was a freak incident. Soon after, an underwear model, same thing. I get interest from the 18-22 boys with the twinky bodies. I can't go out with someone who has the body of a 14 year-old. The biggest issue with young guys is that we're at different stages in lifespan development. I have to explain cultural references and they are generally into different social activities. I currently have a 25 y/o FWB and we have a great time together.

I'd prefer someone my age, but the guys I meet usually want twinks, torsos or for whatever reason seem reticent to date me. If I want to go out on a Friday night, it's almost guaranteed I can get a date with a young guy. Why do they pursue me? Daddy complex? I think some of them have it. A couple told me they are into romance and can't find it with guys their own age. So for now...I guess young guys are OK but I don't think I'd want one for a husband.

 

[D_BenJo_Ahanakokolele]

my limit is 30...

 

[craigsmith]

I am 50 and love sucking guys who are in their 20's and 30's.

 

[onewatcher]

It's been tough issue for me.

As long as I have been attracted to guys, it's been exclusively much older ones. I am talking about physical attractions and not emotional/mental ones. It's very conflicting because I find it rare that I have a strong emotional connection with a considerable age gap, yet at the same time I NEVER feel a physical connection with guys closer to my age.

That leaves me with two black and white options: look for guys I can connect better with or look for guys who turn me on physically.

Or I could hit the jackpot and find one who fits both the criteria. Patience is a virtue.

Keep looking for what you want most.... I hit the jackpot falling in love with a man 27 yrs my junior.. He satisfies me both physically, mentally and spiritually.. I know I fulfill for him the same... It's love..we don't question it.

 

[pachuco2]

I'm 50ish, and I have a friend who is 60ish that I enjoy being around,..we've had our times together (he's gay),...but I feel like I'm a Driving Miss Daisy situation with him cause he doesn't drive, so I help him with his errands,..but on the other other hand I myself enjoy younger-than-me types, cause like others say... " it keeps me young",...and I mean 25's to 35 years old...males and females,..js,..

 

[860687]

i love younger guys dont knw y i just think they r sexy as hell

 

[avatarng]

I have a problem. Maybe you guys can help me.

There are two guys I've met over the last year with whom I've become friends. One is an Asian guy, 22 years old, much more bottom than top. The other is a black guy, originally from Liberia but living here. He's 20 and all top and i have to say, an incredible lover. Both are looking for LTR - like move in, settle down LTR. I'm 56 and my last bf was 20 when we met and that lasted almost 5 years. I tried to avoid that situation at first because he was inexperienced and I figured that at some point he'd want to explore things. That's exactly what happened. About a year before we broke up he got got on line and started hooking up with other guys. I found out when he actually spent a weekend away with a guy.

Anyway, I'm even more hesitant now to do this again. What do you guys think? I've tried talking to them about being open to an open type relationship but neither one of them are interested. They're not looking for any hand outs or financial help. The Asian guy is about to graduate with his MBA in sport sciences and the black guy is in school and working in retail.

I'm not sure what to do.

Walk away from both of them. I hate to say this but will not work. The age gap is to far out.
Find someone a closer to your age.

 

[Silvertip]

my limit is 30...

Is that an upper or lower limit?

Walk away from both of them. I hate to say this but will not work. The age gap is to far out.
Find someone a closer to your age.

Not necessarily. Odds are that you're probably right but a definitive answer can only be found in the hearts of the two people involved. No easy solutions here, it just has to be worked out honestly and with unselfish care on the part of the two guys involved.

 

[someperson]

Now don't crucify me if I'm wrong but I've noticed in the gay community that there is that trend of young guy wanting/dating a much older guy. Why is that? I mean I would think you would want someone round your own age, near it, or at least I wouldn't wanna fuck/date a chick 30 yrs older than me... Thoughts?

I'm attracted to older women always have been.

 

[notN2pussy]

most guys looking/ hitting on me are in their 20s, unsure why

 

[deleted3782]

most guys looking/ hitting on me are in their 20s, unsure why

They are more driven, and have less fear.

I'm one of those cynical guys who can't, for the life of me, understand why a younger guy would want to date an older guy...but I realize that's my baggage and in the end I love to hear stories about the right people connecting and making a life together. :tongue:

 

[Musclehung]

hooked up w a few older bodybuilders before (im 28). these men were late 40s but huge muscle dudes. was nice. less inhibition and got intense!!

 

[notN2pussy]

less fear for sure!

 

[622675]

After reading a number of posts in this thread, there seems to be two groups of younger guys who are not into older. One group is into the sexiness of youth.

The other group seems a bit put off that the older guy would know more, or have had more experience than they have.

Just wondering if those guys in the first group would be put off by a sexy young thing that had more experience, learning, or responsibility than they had.

 

[B_smooth_7]

After reading a number of posts in this thread, there seems to be two groups of younger guys who are not into older. One group is into the sexiness of youth.

The other group seems a bit put off that the older guy would know more, or have had more experience than they have.

Just wondering if those guys in the first group would be put off by a sexy young thing that had more experience, learning, or responsibility than they had.

I don't necessarily think it's about the sexiness of youth but just plain attraction to guys their own age. Some guys however are legitimately attracted to either older or younger guys. I'm not attracted to guys my age and can't explain it either. I use to be but as I got older my attraction to guys remained static at the mid 20s to mid 30s. I've met younger guys who say they've always been attracted to older men even when they were much younger.

 

[622675]

I guess we are all somewhat fixated on the conditions during which we had our best times. The same seems to work for music, cars, movies, and the like. Unfortunately we may be living our lives focused on the past and missing a lot of great opportunities today. Something to consider.

 

[Stringer]

Physical attraction is pretty simple: you like what you like and there's no controlling it. I'm wired to like guys older than me and am not into anyone my age. It's the same as just being gay...you can't force yourself to like the opposite sex. Everyone should go for who they like without fear of judgment. There are people out there only attracted to morbidly obese people, believe it or not. It's whatever.

Seeking older guys for money/whatever is a different story.