Your Birth Experiences

Discussion in 'Women's Issues' started by SpoiledPrincess, Feb 4, 2008.

  1. SpoiledPrincess

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    Men really don't need to read this and if they do when they were warned then they shouldn't whine about being grossed out.

    The experiences we've had giving birth and being pregnant have often been touched on in other threads so I thought it'd be nice if we all had a thread to put down our personal experiences and any thoughts.

    I have two children who are now grown up. I really enjoyed being pregnant, I'm not really a morning person (I need two coffees and several cigarettes before I'm even approachable) but when I was pregnant I found myself getting up all perky and peppy. I didn't have any problems when I was pregnant, my mum had had six kids, four of them home births, so we'd all been in the house when she was giving birth and I didn't remember any screaming, I knew she'd been fine a few hours later so I wasn't scared about giving birth. Then when I was about five months or so the doctor who was doing my routine check up glanced at my feet and said what size shoes do you take, I said 2 or 3 and he decided that indicated a tiny pelvis so I had to have an x-ray as the scan wasn't precise enough, the x ray came back and they decided my pelvis was 'adequate' which to me sounded like there was enough room - just. But I didn't worry about it, what will be will be.

    I sailed through my pregnancy, I didn't like having huge tits one bit, they were always there in my way, but that was the only bit I wasn't keen on, I didn't have any heartburn or aches and pains.

    I was always convinced my waters would break in a shop, my waters did break but not in a shop, it was all over my mum's sofa. I told her and my dad (I was there for dinner waiting for my husband's arrival from work) that my waters had broken and I expected it to be like it was on films, everyone would rush around panicking but they all calmly got on with their dinner so that was a bit disappointing.

    I wasn't having any pains so I carried on doing what I was doing, at around 9 pm I wasn't sure whether or not I was having labour pains, I was aware of rhythmic slight discomfort but it wasn't what you'd really call pain, but I went into hospital anyway. The pains got stronger, they were more or less like very bad period pains, but nothing unbearable, I didn't get any pains in my back. I was examined when I arrived at hospital and I was already 4 centimetres dilated then. It moved along very quickly but it still wasn't that painful, and at around 11.30 I wanted to push, my husband called a midwife to examine me, as she came in she said 'you can't be ready yet' but after a quick feel around she said that I was fully dilated. I was wheeled into a delivery suite and commenced pushing, damn that's hard work :mad: Things seemed to be moving along very quickly, me pushing and grunting, my husband holding my hand, the midwife not really having much to do, then I felt a burning pain and the midwife informed me that I'd started ripping and she was going to give me a 'little episiotomy', I'd imagined that an episiotomy would involve numbing you up first but no, that bloody hurt like nothing I'd ever imagined, fortunately it was over so quickly that as soon as my body registered the pain it was over. A few pushes later and she was born. Dead on 12, now this makes it difficult for them to decide on the day of birth, clocks may be out a few minutes or so, so they told me that in cases like this they don't cut the cord, while she's still attached to me in some way it's not counted as being born, so they waited a few minutes, then cut it. And that was it, all over surprisingly easy and quickly. She weighed 7lbs 10 oz, she had a huge mass of black hair and was absolutely gorgeous.

    Almost three years later I'm back in the same maternity hospital having my son, my water's didn't break this time, I had a show, which I'd read in books was a 'tiny amount of blood and mucus' it looked like the Texas chainsaw massacre was going on between my legs, there was so much blood I asked if something was wrong but I was assured that was quite normal. The pain was stronger this time but still nowhere near unbearable, but after three hours I started moaning that something was wrong, that second labours were supposed to be faster than first labours, they had a look at me and said nothing was wrong, that it was progressing very quickly, I was dilating nicely and basically to stop whining. The midwife said it was taking longer because my waters hadn't broken, a cervix dilates more rapidly around a baby's head than it does around an amniotic sac. Anyway he was born after 5 hours, I didn't have an episiotomy this time but I did rip exactly along the episiotomy line but I didn't even feel that, the second stage of labour was much quicker this time, with my daughter it had been approximately half an hour, this time it was less than 5 minutes. He weighed 8lbs 10 and had the same shock of dark hair that my daughter had, in fact they looked so alike when they were born they could have been identical twins. I had three stitches both times but neither time suffered much perineal discomfort.

    I was very lucky and I found giving birth a very positive experience but we'd decided when we were married that we wanted two kids so that was where we stopped.

    Oh yeah, placentas are the most disgusting things I've ever seen, I had no temptation to take it home and fry it up for sunday lunch.
     
  2. B_625girth

    B_625girth New Member

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    didn't gross me out. I was in the room for 2 of my 3 sons births. the first one I was watching thru a big glass window, back in 1982 the local hospital did not allow fathers in the room. the next son came in 1987 and the last in 1988. on the last one, the head nurse and myself delivered my son, the doctor had been drinking too much at a New Years Eve party.
     
  3. SpoiledPrincess

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    Mine wasn't particularly gross though, I'm sure someone's going to come along and their story will be full of blood and guts :) I like that father's are usually there now, mine was for both births, my dad used to pace the floor while he waited for my mum to give birth.
     
  4. The Dragon

    The Dragon New Member

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    The first time I got pregnant with my (then) husband I was very ill with morning sickness and at 10 weeks we decided to go out and buy nursery furniture.
    We had picked what we liked and where standing at the counter to settle the bill when I was hit with huge cramping pains that didn't let up and left me doubled up on the floor of the store.
    I was carted off to hospital and had a exam, pain relief and was sent for foetal heart beat scan. There wasn't one. We where gutted. I was informed that the "tissue" would pass and it would be something I could deal with myself at home.
    What was the icing on the cake was when we got home after all this happening, our next door neigbour brought their brand new baby home from the hospital.
    No matter how we closed up that side of the house and drew the curtains the sounds of the new born crying just ripped out my heart and added to my sorrows.
    The second and third miscarriages, my(then) husband was at work and refused to come home upon being informed of what was happening.
    I rung the ambulance and made my way to hospital.
    My (then) husband did manage to ring his mother who came to our house so he could have his dinner at the correct time.
    I did manage to keep and give birth to two beautiful babies and the inlaws where very grateful the first born was male the second was a stunning little girl.
     
  5. Act2_Begins_Now

    Act2_Begins_Now New Member

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    Thanks SP for starting this thread.

    My three pregnancies were all very pleasant, I have often teased that if I was a black woman during the days of slavery I would have been identified as a breeder (Note: Please do not take offense, this is not meant as a racist statement, as I understand it is 'fact' of that time). I would be identified as such because of my size, easy pregmancies and labor.

    I have three children, one a teenager and the two others are grown and out of the house. I concieved each and every one of them while using some sort of birth control. My dreams as a little girl was never to be a mother, but rather the cool aunt that nieces and nephews would adore.

    My morning sickness only manifested when I was hungry. No matter what time of day, if I skipped a meal I would dry heave until I got something nourishing in my stomach. It always had to be nourishing, I never craved any of the crazy stuff. With my first I craved pizza and salad bar, the second I craved spicy and mostly mexican food and with the third broccolli and V8.

    All three labors ranged from four to six hours, with the middle child being a home birth. My eldest had me in the hospital for three days, as that is how they did it then. But after my second, I was doing laundry later that same day and with the third child, I cleaned house the day I came home. I had even had a tubal ligation the day after I had her and still did the house work.

    My first was two weeks early and weighed 8lb 4oz, the second was two weeks late and weighed an even 8lbs and the third came in at 6lbs and 4 1/2 oz and was born on her first due date. We had three due dates, they kept changing it. Not sure they knew what they were doing, as they told me I wasn't pregnant a number of times (I knew I was though) until I was five months along, then they finally agreed with me.
     
  6. SandraSmithCarver

    SandraSmithCarver New Member

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    i have 3 boys, 2 of them were twins, and they were first!
    But, LOVED being pregnant, loved the attention, loved being able to eat what ever i wanted. With my twins i was on bed rest the last 8 weeks, and then they were induced,, which wasn't fun,, ended up having a C-section anyway.

    but with my 3rd son i hired a doula to help me with my delivery, since the doc of course wanted to do another c-section, which i did not want, it was a wonderful delivery, he was born the day after he was due, i had no medication, no IV, practiced my Lamaze breathing and that got me through,,I pushed for an hour, but i didnt want to be cut again, and i succeded! it was wonderful, i was awake totally and it was the best!
     
  7. nay-nay

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    Aww. :biggrin1: Thanks for posting! I am not a mother, but definetely want to have children when I'm older. It's interesting reading all the stories.
     
  8. SpoiledPrincess

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    It's strange how birth experiences can vary simply due to the fact there's a few years between them, when my mum had me it was common to have a 'lying in period' where you weren't allowed out of bed except for a pee and to bathe, she had to stay in bed for ten days when she had me. When I had my daughter the custom was to stay in five days for a first baby, that seemed a hell of a long time, it was also customary to be given an enema, I was so glad to have escaped that, they said I was too far along to be given one - yay :)
     
  9. Ed69

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    Wow my wife was sent home the next day with the first birth.And about two days later with the second.But the second birth included a double hernia repair in her belly!She ripped her stomache giving birth to our son!

    I was there from conception to birth and after.Men please show some respect for the woman that let's you stick your dick in her.My wife risked her life to bring our children into the world.Yes I held her hand and coached her breathing for the contractions,but thats nothing compared to what she did!
     
  10. SpoiledPrincess

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    A lot of it depends on when you gave birth ed, when I had my daughter and son it was five days for a first birth, two for a second, now in the same hospital it's six hours. The only times I've been in hospital were to give birth, I bloody hated it, while in there I was pacing the room constantly and counting off the hours that dragged like leaden feet.

    I agree that men should be there, it's their baby too, and it hardly seems fair that so many men want joint custody, equal rights with babies when they haven't had an equal input all along, they can't share the actual birth itself, but they should be there.
     
  11. Act2_Begins_Now

    Act2_Begins_Now New Member

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    As it was with my first child too and to be shaved. When I came in the nurses put me in the 'labor' room and told me I was going to be there awhile and I just needed to make myself comfortable. Shortly thereafter, they were rushing me down the hall to the delivery room. The doctor just made it in time and he was not pleased because the nurses hadn't shaved me nor given me an enema. He was a jerk about and that is one of the memories of my first birth experience, the nurses explaining how I had just got there and they had no time to do either.
     
  12. jhm

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    watching my wife give birth to our children, through very difficult labor, profoundly affected me. I will cherish and love her until the day I die.
     
  13. SexandCandy

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    I have a birth story for my last child online, it touches on all the other births too... I'll copy & paste... but there are pictures if you LADIES want to see (it's got my name on it)... it's REALLY long.... This is a start... the first page... LOL! :)

    [FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]The road to my fourth child Madelyn’s birth was a long one. So much thought, so much preparation, and so much anxiety [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]went into the decision to have her at home, that the pregnancy experience this fourth time truly was life changing.[/FONT]

    [FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]In order to understand where I was coming from, you’d need to understand where I’d been before. You’d need to know a [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]little about my previous births. All of my children were born in the hospital. All my children were healthy and born vaginally [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times](one had meconium staining at birth and stayed in the NICU during my two day hospital stay, but he was fine), but the births [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]and the birthing process itself was always interrupted by medical (“mis”)management of my labor. I left the hospital each [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]time, happy to have my newborn, but not feeling overjoyed by the birth process. Other women I talked to had felt the same [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]way and told me that labor was just something you went through to have a baby. I knew that deep down, there was [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]something missing, and deep down, I knew they were wrong.[/FONT]

    [FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]My entire pregnancy with Madelyn was a lesson in trusting my body, and trusting my intuition. I can say now, that I am very [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]glad to have made the choice to listen and trust in both. [/FONT]

    [FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]Several months before I became pregnant, I had a very vivid dream about a little child who was waiting for me. This little [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]girl, appeared to me in my dream, and looked a lot like my son Joey, but with curly hair. She told me she was waiting for me.[/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times] I knew I wanted a fourth child, and shortly after that dream, began to feel that urge to try for another baby. I talked it over [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]with my husband, Frank, and we went ahead with our plans to try for our last child. [/FONT]

    [FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]When I became pregnant, I immediately remembered my dream from the months earlier, and knew that this child was a girl. [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]Through the first couple months, I had several more dreams where I delivered the baby in various rooms of my home. Even [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]though I had been planning on a hospital delivery again, the frequency of these homebirth dreams sparked enough curiosity in[/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times] me to start looking into the safety of homebirth. Frank was not comfortable with the idea of a homebirth at all, so I didn’t [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]even say anything to him at first. I started a search for a midwife instead of an obstetrician. Every time I found something that [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]looked promising, I hit a dead end. Finally, I found what I thought would be the answer. There was an obstetrician who did [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]waterbirths in a hospital in the next town over. It was a slightly longer drive to that hospital, but I figured that this guy would [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]have a more hands off approach, and would be more holistic in his approach to birthing than any other doctor in the area. I [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]met with him once and decided to see him for prenatal care.[/FONT]

    [FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]All the while, I kept having these dreams of birthing at home. I dreamt of birthing in my bathroom, in the kids’ playroom, in [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]my bedroom, in the kids’ bathroom, out in our hot tub, on the back porch and even in the kitchen. I dreamt of a waterbirth, I[/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times] dreamt of a land birth, but in every dream where I delivered a baby, I kept seeing me at home. [/FONT]

    [FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]Sparked by my dreams again, I decided to look into homebirth as an option again, and knew that I had my obstetrician as a [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]back up in case anything fell through. So I was not yet sold on the idea of delivering at home, but it definitely appealed to me.[/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times] I bought a few books that were geared towards natural childbirth, as I didn’t want any kinds of interventions with the birth [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]this time around, and found Birthing From Within by Pam England. [/FONT]

    [FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]After reading that book, I was geared up to avoid the hospital if I could, as I had not had successes with the hospital [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]respecting my wishes in the past three births I had. Reading that book, sparked my quest for homebirth knowledge and [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]reading that book, was the door that I needed to pass through to feel comfortable with birthing at home. There were two [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]sections that really caught my attention in that book. The first, was Pam’s recollection of a museum exhibit, where a [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]prehistoric woman had a small infant with her. She had begun to think about how this woman labored and delivered that [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]child. That whole section got me thinking about how birth was a natural event, and obviously our bodies were built to birth [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]babies without help. The next section was a series of questions to answer for yourself about how you felt during your [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]previous births or previous experiences. I answered them honestly and found that I had dug deeper than I initially thought I [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]would, when I went back and read my answers. I uncovered how unhappy I had been with my birthing experiences before. I[/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times] discovered that I had always felt like a prisoner in a hospital, rather than a patient. I wasn’t allowed to make choices for [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]myself, they were made for me. As a person who likes to be in control of her life, this was unacceptable. I was always happy[/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times] that I had a child at the end, but the whole process left something to be desired.[/FONT]

    [FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]Continuing along in my quest for knowledge, I began digging into the homebirth files on the internet and I found a site about [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]Unassisted Childbirth. Since I hadn’t been able to find a midwife to do homebirths in my area, it intrigued me, so I began to [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]study more about it. Shortly thereafter, I made the choice to consider an unassisted birth as an option. The more I uncovered[/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times] about hospital policies and procedures, including the ones that were applied to my previous births, and the more I [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]uncovered about the risks of some of the interventions that no one had ever told me, the more I became angry. I became [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]angry at the fact that some of the things that were done to me in the hospital were never discussed with me or fully explained [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]to me as being something that could potentially be harmful to my child or to myself. No one had ever told me anything, and I [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,adobe-times,Times]never thought to ask anyone. After all, I was raised to believe that doctors knew best. [/FONT]
     
  14. D_Sue Ellen Brastretcher

    D_Sue Ellen Brastretcher Account Disabled

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    :smile: Sweet.
     
  15. SpoiledPrincess

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    I was saying to someone else Sex&Candy that what most women seem to have in common is that the medical staff are very reluctant to give you information.
     
  16. ManlyBanisters

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    Yeah - there seems to be this idea that either you can't handle it or you're better off not knowing or some such bullshit. I don't know about the rest of you but when it finally dawned on me that I was going to have to get something up to 5kilos (10+ lbs) and up to 38cm (15") in circumference out of me I went and read every bloody thing I could find about the whole process. Fore-warned is fore-armed, you know?

    As it was I needn't have bothered with any of the pushing / tearing stuff - turns out my pussy has a 'strictly no exit' sign at the uterus end :rolleyes:
     
  17. SpoiledPrincess

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    Yeah I went out and bought the current copy of the book that student midwives were using - way too much information in there :)
     
  18. D_Prudence_Admonition_Drightits

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    This is a great idea. Thank you Spoiled Princess.

    Well let me first begin by saying I had difficulty getting pregnant. Actually this past November, I went in to have fibroids removed so I could get pregnant. The doctor ended up giving me a full hysterectomy, scraping endometrosis from my colon and fixing an incisional hernia. I was a little shocked when I woke up, we had discussed the possibilities of me having a full hysterectomy, but I didn't think it would happen. Now I am wearing a hormone patch. Which I would like to see a new thread about those going through the change and who is using hormone patches, why or why not.

    But I would like to say my pregnancy was good. The little kicks and hiccups I felt-hearing the heartbeat-seeing the ultrasound of my son sucking his thumb. It was at that moment I knew that would be the only time I could keep my child protected.

    The birth itself was very hard. My doctor did not come in because he was drunk during the New Year. The new doctor looked at me and said the weight of my baby was underestimated, he wasn't eight pounds but at least 10 plus pounds. They tried to deliver him vaginally, got to the neck, realized he was way too big. I promised my husband if something life threatening happened to let me go and save the baby.

    I just remember the emergency situation and then they knocked me out. I had to have a c-section. So there I was 3rd degree episiotomy and c-section. The ordeal was had on my son to. He the muscle tone on his whole left side was gone. My son was 11 pounds and 23 inches long.

    He and I are fine now and I thank God for sparing me so I could enjoy my son. Being a parent has been one of the best things to happen to me.
     
  19. SpoiledPrincess

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    My kids were both fairly tall at birth (56 centimetres, the average is 50) but my little brother was 11lb 12 oz, he looked like a three month old baby when he was born.

    I loved when my babies kicked, it's something you have to experience for yourself before you understand what it feels like :)
     
  20. lttlgrllst

    lttlgrllst New Member

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    My first birth experience was awful. I had a Dr. that would run in look at my chart and run back out. No time for question's or anything. I was very young also. It was during the last few weeks of pregnancy (when you start going in every week) I went in and they hooked up the heartbeat monitor but they couldn't find a heartbeat. They put me in the hospital, did an ultrasound, couldn't detect any movement. They decided to induce labor but it took about 24 hours before I had her. Every few hours a nurse (with the longest fingernails I have ever felt) would come in and check to see how far along I was. When it came to the delivery they knocked me out. I didn't even get to see her. They couldn't tell us what had happened. The Dr. just said, you're young you'll have more children. After that experience I decided I never wanted to have children but eventually (15 years later) I changed my mind.

    My second pregnancy was wonderful, no morning sickness, my Dr. was great. In light of my history he wanted to induce labor a few weeks early but my son had other ideas! About 4 days before we were scheduled to induce I started spotting. It was a weekend so I couldn't call the Dr. I called the hospital several times, I wasn't having any pain so they said don't come in unless you have blood running down your leg. I waited until the next day and went in. They hooked me up to the monitors and didn't think I was in labor yet. They were getting ready to send me home when they decided to see if I was dilated. I was, so they kept me and 4 hours later my son was born. I didn't have too much pain until the actual pushing. That's when I decided I wanted drugs and lot's of them! But it was too late for that. The babies heart rate started going down so the Dr. had to use forceps. That was painful.

    I will never forget the wonderful feeling I had when he was born. He was fine until that night and I noticed he was breathing hard. They immediately put him in the nicu and started running tests. They found a hole in one of the arteries going to his heart. He didn't have to have surgery, the pediatric cardiologist said these things often close by themselves. They kept him in the nicu for 4 days with all kinds of needles and wires hooked to him. He had to have several EKG's done but by the time he was 6 months old it had closed up. Kind of scary though.

    My third pregnancy was wonderful also, no morning sickness anyway. I had the same Dr. that I trusted and so I wasn't as stressed as before. Month 4 when they did the urine and blood work, I had low levels of something (can't remember what) in my urine. It indicated downs syndrome so they wanted to do an amniocentesis. The staff talked to us about our options (aborting) if the test turned out positive. I didn't think I could do that. The test was negative but I couldn't help worrying about it.

    The labor was induced. This one went with the schedule. I had an epidural, on my Dr's advice. No pain so I was able to enjoy it more. Yea I know I'm a wimp! I was scared that something would be wrong with the baby. He was fine though, a beautiful baby boy. No problems at all.

    My husband was there for the second and third birth. The first one they wouldn't let him stay for the actual birth. The second one I wouldn't let go of his hand and the third one he pretty much stayed out of my reach. I just feel extremely blessed to have my children and that they are healthy.
     
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