" Your not really Bi"

[wes222]

So to make it short and simple, I get instantly coined as Gay. I like both, I don't make it public because it isn't anyone business. I do have femininely mannerism and maybe that is why (I was also raised by a single mom). I am just ME, I tend to really get offended when people call me gay due to I am attracted to both. When people ask me I never say I am Bi but I do hint at it when I say "Idc, I look for personality first and if they love me for me then that's where its at and it will be likewise" I guess it really bothers me because I met a girl I really liked but the rumor factory made them think I was fully unavailable because I was gay. I did have a talk with her eventually but it was like set in stone, she didn't believe I was Bi and had a thought I was trying to trick her to give off a straight profile. This isn't a " What should I do" question but more of a talk of experience and how to handle being Bi; should I just be more unapologetic and state I am Bi when talking about sexual preference ? Or am I right to just be in the same lane I've always been; Not giving a fuck what people think my sexual preference is and if they are interested they will just find out.

 

[halcyondays]

IMO if the woman you really liked was attracted to you she wouldn't care what the rumor mill said.

In my experience women who are interested let me know. That said I have asked out many women I find attractive who haven't. I can't read minds. I'll never know unless I ask.

IMO you are better off just being yourself especially if trying to be something you're not makes you miserable.

Full disclosure. I get instantly coined as straight but have an empathic personality type which sometimes confuses the linear thinking of the black-or-white straight-or-gay crowd.

 

[bi2]

Not giving a fuck what people think my sexual preference is

Its how I feel and how I am.

What I do in private is literally not anyone's business if its consenting.

I love and enjoy being with women both sexually and emotionally. That doesnt mean every now and then I dont get the urge or need to be fucked by my male partner. This happens usually once every couple of weeks or so, sometimes shorter, sometimes longer. However, whenever he contacts me Im almost always keen to hook up as I always love and enjoy the sex we have. Outside of our physical relationship we have almost zero contact or interaction. He has his wife and I have my own life. We come together for sex as there is obviously a void that needs to be filled, pardon the pun lol.

Am I gay? Am I bi? I dont know and I dont care. Im happy and content.

 

[flatiron]

Not giving a fuck what people think my sexual preference is and if they are interested they will just find out.

Best advice you could ever possibly give yourself.

Be true to you. And it sounds like you already are.

 

[nhguy78]

There are so many gatekeepers on how we interact sexually.... or not. I don't usually get that directly to me as an asexual but I hear about it all the time. Oh, you just haven't found the right now. You're just nervous. You're actually straight or you're just a solosexual. No. I don't find anyone sexually arousing. This doesn't mean I don't like sex. I do but I don't have sex because of sexual attraction. If I am horny and I have a consenting person who is also horny, let's do it. I am married. We occasionally have sex. He's pan. If he knows I'm aroused and ready to go he may ask me to put it in his bum. I'm like .... OK, roll over. LOL

Anyways, not to take away from your topic. It's all gatekeeping. People think they can define us better than we can define ourselves.

 

[deleted13888921]

I'm bi and really enjoy the lifestyle. My ex wifey was also bi. Many, many hot encounters with men and women, sometimes both at the same time. That said, fucking pussy is the best. Don't get me wrong, doing a guy feels awesome, it's just not the same feeling. Many gay guys don't get that. It's not a put down or a bag. Pussy is wet, hot, juicy, and when a woman cums while I'm inside her it's pure bliss. Yes, I had many hot guys with asses that were tight, hot and made me cum in a minute of entering. It is the cock that I crave to have fuck me. What I like on a woman are the tits. I live for nice, big boobs (real or fake), perky nipples. On a guy hot lean and ripped bodies, big cut cocks. Yes, I am honestly bi, and love it!

 

[Lance V]

Honestly, my sexuality has never been questioned by a woman. I'm not muscular or macho, but when I'm with a woman she has my full and complete attention.

I've been tagged gay by more than a few men. And when they learn that I have been intimate with women they either understand or don't understand. It's not my responsibility to make them do either.

I've never had a woman asked if I've been with a man before. But I've had gay and bi men asked if I've been with a woman.

 

[CaptainRugby]

I’ve had quite a few comments on the line of ”You’re not really bi” almost exclusively from girls, in my experience they are much more put out by bisexuality than guys. Guys are often intrigued, and many of them a bit jealous.

 

[alpha_centauri]

I just laugh at them, and ignore them...

 

[BuckyD]

Its how I feel and how I am.

What I do in private is literally not anyone's business if its consenting.

I love and enjoy being with women both sexually and emotionally. That doesnt mean every now and then I dont get the urge or need to be fucked by my male partner. This happens usually once every couple of weeks or so, sometimes shorter, sometimes longer. However, whenever he contacts me Im almost always keen to hook up as I always love and enjoy the sex we have. Outside of our physical relationship we have almost zero contact or interaction. He has his wife and I have my own life. We come together for sex as there is obviously a void that needs to be filled, pardon the pun lol.

Am I gay? Am I bi? I dont know and I dont care. Im happy and content.

Can totally relate - you sound like you have it all together man!

 

[MilfBanger78]

My end goal, is to cum lol

 

[dickthrobbing]

should I just be more unapologetic and state I am Bi when talking about sexual preference ? Or am I right to just be in the same lane I've always been; Not giving a fuck what people think my sexual preference is and if they are interested they will just find out.

If someone is interested in your sexual preferences then be unapologetic about being bi, once they have been told if they get bent out of shape about it then 'don't give a fuck'

 

[Cappy_Dick]

Being bisexual is very often misunderstood. It can be anything between masturbatory fantasies that are never acted on, to buddy sex. They stroke and suck each other to get off, but no more than that. Then there are guys that will do anything in gay sex with a guy, but has no interest in a relationship beyond having sex. Then there are those, like the OP, who is equally attracted to men and women, both physically and emotionally.

Only about 10% of humans fall into the categories of 100% straight, gay or bisexual. Than means that 90% of us are some level of bi, but identify as "straight", or "gay", as to not be alienated by the community of their more dominant orientation. A lot of men that identify as gay would have sex with a woman, so long as no one would find out. Similarly, many men that identify as straight, would play on some level with a guy, so long as no one found out.

I publicly identify as straight, because I strongly prefer women physically and emotionally. In bisexual circles, I identify as curious, so that I fit in. I have been told by many Bi's, that I'm not really bi, because I'm not interested in kissing, topping/bottoming, or dating men. Just the same as the straight folks would say that I am not straight, because I have had some hj/bj buddies in the past and probably would again, under the right circumstances.

Society is entirely too obsessed with labels and people fitting in them. I will never see it in my lifetime, but the world would be a much better place if people didn't judge, or label what consenting adults do for pleasure amongst themselves.

 

[tnman]

Being bisexual is very often misunderstood. It can be anything between masturbatory fantasies that are never acted on, to buddy sex. They stroke and suck each other to get off, but no more than that. Then there are guys that will do anything in gay sex with a guy, but has no interest in a relationship beyond having sex. Then there are those, like the OP, who is equally attracted to men and women, both physically and emotionally.

Only about 10% of humans fall into the categories of 100% straight, gay or bisexual. Than means that 90% of us are some level of bi, but identify as "straight", or "gay", as to not be alienated by the community of their more dominant orientation. A lot of men that identify as gay would have sex with a woman, so long as no one would find out. Similarly, many men that identify as straight, would play on some level with a guy, so long as no one found out.

I publicly identify as straight, because I strongly prefer women physically and emotionally. In bisexual circles, I identify as curious, so that I fit in. I have been told by many Bi's, that I'm not really bi, because I'm not interested in kissing, topping/bottoming, or dating men. Just the same as the straight folks would say that I am not straight, because I have had some hj/bj buddies in the past and probably would again, under the right circumstances.

Society is entirely too obsessed with labels and people fitting in them. I will never see it in my lifetime, but the world would be a much better place if people didn't judge, or label what consenting adults do for pleasure amongst themselves.

I don't know where you got you information, but most is dead ass wrong!

 

[Cappy_Dick]

Maybe in your world. You have a right to your own opinion, but there's no need for you to be rude about mine.

 

[bigboaster]

Plenty of ignorant tools still try to deny people's bisexuality right here on this forum, Happened to me just this week. Quite pathetic when gay men are no better than homophobes

 

[bi2]

Society is entirely too obsessed with labels and people fitting in them. I will never see it in my lifetime, but the world would be a much better place if people didn't judge, or label what consenting adults do for pleasure amongst themselves.

Look how far we have progressed in the last 5 years, 10 years and also compare that to say 100 years ago.

I can only imagine in a decade or two from now, it will all be considered "normal".

 

[1373263]

It seems that you feel your sexuality needs a label- bi, gay, straight, whatever...
So if you interact with a man sexually, you are gay? only on that day? Likewise for women?
You feel that masculinity makes you straight and gay men are effeminate?

These are only perspectives, sometimes based on experience and sometimes on perception. People perceive me as "straight" because I am quietly masculine and work in a trade ,but I'm actually interested in men and women and this has developed over time and stabilised. If I were to feel the need for a label it would be bi; although what I like changes, the pattern of sexual relations with both men and women has been consistent for nearly 15 years now. In terms of changes in interest, I may have many sexual interactions with a male FB over say a fortnight because that's what I feel the need for, and then meet a woman and develop a sexual relationship with her over the next month or so because that also feels like a good thing to do.
I have had periods where I have had sexual interactions with both men and women but it's usually one or the other, so does that make me gay or straight?

Over time my preference is my preference and it has been stable since I came to terms with my sexual interest in men and developed some experience in this regard.

I don't think the label matters as you don't need to put yourself in a box, and especially when you are young, its possible you will act on a curiosity and discover a new world.
For example: a male FB is "gay" or homosexual in that over time his sexual interactions have become exclusively with men, and we often banter about this; I tell him he doesn't know what he is missing, but in truth he has sexual experience with women and either doesn't like it or simply prefers sex with men- which one is irrelevant to me. Likewise, a female "friend" was a fierce lesbian when I met her 25 years ago but now quite openly admits that F2F sex became less appealing as she grew older, to the point where she now wouldn't even consider a relationship with a woman; from my observations and experience she likes cock and quite a bit of it at times.

 

[deleted1360056]

Being bisexual is very often misunderstood. It can be anything between masturbatory fantasies that are never acted on, to buddy sex. They stroke and suck each other to get off, but no more than that. Then there are guys that will do anything in gay sex with a guy, but has no interest in a relationship beyond having sex. Then there are those, like the OP, who is equally attracted to men and women, both physically and emotionally.

Only about 10% of humans fall into the categories of 100% straight, gay or bisexual. Than means that 90% of us are some level of bi, but identify as "straight", or "gay", as to not be alienated by the community of their more dominant orientation. A lot of men that identify as gay would have sex with a woman, so long as no one would find out. Similarly, many men that identify as straight, would play on some level with a guy, so long as no one found out.

I publicly identify as straight, because I strongly prefer women physically and emotionally. In bisexual circles, I identify as curious, so that I fit in. I have been told by many Bi's, that I'm not really bi, because I'm not interested in kissing, topping/bottoming, or dating men. Just the same as the straight folks would say that I am not straight, because I have had some hj/bj buddies in the past and probably would again, under the right circumstances.

Society is entirely too obsessed with labels and people fitting in them. I will never see it in my lifetime, but the world would be a much better place if people didn't judge, or label what consenting adults do for pleasure amongst themselves.

For some reason online people like to get technical with labels. If a guy is only into women 99% of the time, only dates women, but gets head or tops once in awhile now he's 'bi' and in denial if he doesn't have a sign out front of his house. Like you said, most people aren't 100%. Tons of guys are curious and down to mess around in the right mood but are mostly straight. I know lots of women like this, they identify as straight because saying 'bi' would be misleading and no one questions it.

I identify as straight because that covers it for 99.99% of all interactions I have with people. No normal conversation in real life goes: "yeah I'm mostly straight but DTF a smooth ass here and there."

 

[bi2]

For some reason online people like to get technical with labels. If a guy is only into women 99% of the time, only dates women, but gets head or tops once in awhile now he's 'bi' and in denial if he doesn't have a sign out front of his house. Like you said, most people aren't 100%. Tons of guys are curious and down to mess around in the right mood but are mostly straight. I know lots of women like this, they identify as straight because saying 'bi' would be misleading and no one questions it.

I identify as straight because that covers it for 99.99% of all interactions I have with people. No normal conversation in real life goes: "yeah I'm mostly straight but DTF a smooth ass here and there."

My male partner considers himself straight. I have no issues whatsoever with this, its his right and choice.

We meet up occasionally for casual hookups and then go about our lives seperately till we have that need/itch again. He is married and loves his wife and wants to be with her, but she no longer is interested in sex. I definitely dont want to be with a man or him for that matter.

However, we provide a sexual outlet for each other that is simple and convenient. He is very much an alpha male dominant top and myself a very submissive feminine bottom. We both enjoy the sex we have the roles we undertake. We lead our own private seperate lives until there is a need for us to hook up.