Your opinion on sub men

[1345864]

Hi there,

I was wanting to get some female opinions on sub guys. As a guy who's reasonably assertive in the regular world, but modestly endowed and preferring his sexual partner to be in control, what do you think of guys who prefer to be the beta in the bedroom? I do know that some women like more take charge alpha-type guys under the sheets. But I can't help but believe that eager to please submissives occupy a valuable niche in the world too.

Apologies if this is posted in the wrong area of the forum!

Todd

 

[693987]

I'm fine with submissive partners. I'm a switch, so submissive or dominant is fine. I won't swap roles back and forth with the same individual, though. If I'm dominant to someone, I would not be able to get into a submissive mindset with them. I've had a few male playmates that were submissive, and one male I dated for a while who was submissive.

 

[LaFemme]

Not my thing.

 

[Enid]

i started my sexual journey (jesus i sound like an Erica Jong novel) exploring my submissive side in different ways until i grew bored and restless. eventually i came into my dominant side and now, quite frankly, i couldn't be with someone who wasn't a switch. i would get so bored in only one role for the duration of a LTR.

that said, current mood is that i do feel fonder of the idea of a submissive man than i do of a dominant man. i'll say it: the dom male internet persona is fucking gross to me. it's usually either pure misogyny at worst and peacocking at best. keep that shit away from me please!

 

[EllieP]

I won't label myself as a dominant. Let's call me assertive. Yeah, I like that.

But I like my men like that too. I've dated submissive men before but I don't think I've ever had one as a lover. That's just too much work on my part.

 

[Holly Doors]

Not my thing as in I couldn't be in a relationship with a submissive guy, I like the man in my life to be well and truly in control between the sheets. As for extra curricula sexual activities well that's where I'm the boss, that's where I express my dominant side and even let the bitch out depending on what others are into.
We kinda have our pecking order, my husband is my King and I am his Queen, our swing friends are our subjects and take their positions beneath us having their own hierarchy of their choice. More and more we see a change over the years, the couples we play with tend to play it that the guy is the most submissive with his woman in control, however this is not always the case in their personal relationship but tends to be more often when we're all together.

 

[TinyPrincess]

I prefer men that are at least somewhat dominant. Otherwise they don't stand a chance around me.

 

[Tight_N_Juicy]

I find it enjoyable for the l most part. My relationship now is the only one where my man is the more dominant partner sexually.

As far as day to day life we compromise and communicate on an equal level, but sexually I submit to him almost always. Sometimes we switch roles, but generally he's Dom.

If he was more submissive I don't think I would be turned off. Not at all. Having said that, I do find it totally hot that he is able to flip the script and turned Me into the submissive partner.

 

[1345864]

I prefer men that are at least somewhat dominant. Otherwise they don't stand a chance around me.

Wow I think you'd eat me alive!

 

[deleted924715]

Doesn't appeal to me personally. Then again, neither do most of the guys who describe themselves as "alpha".

 

[LaFemme]

Doesn't appeal to me personally. Then again, neither do most of the guys who describe themselves as "alpha".

Omg. Any man who calls himself an “alpha male” makes me run like hell!

 

[1345864]

Omg. Any man who calls himself an “alpha male” makes me run like hell!

Most guys that do are total tools.

 

[693987]

Those who self-describe as "alpha" = no. That being said, self-described "nice" people = no, too.

 

[1345864]

That is true as well.

 

[Scarletbegonia]

I don’t switch, and I’m not a domme. I can barely service top. And it’s sad and lame.
We’d be a bad match, physically and ultimately, mentally.

Now, my guy has said I’m aggressive about a particular act, and that it is welcome. I just like the particular thing, know he loves it, so I might overindulge.
But what’s weird is how I reacted to his use of the word “aggressive.” It felt wrong, and not my mental image of me in private moments.

And I also walk when the word alpha gets rolled out. I don’t date pack animals.

 

[286798]

I find confidence to be a turn-on... in the real world and in the bedroom. My initial reaction was "meh, not my thing"... but I've got to say, I think the way you phrased this is interesting...

But I can't help but believe that eager to please submissives occupy a valuable niche in the world too.

If your "sub-ness" is focused on my pleasure (i.e. eager to please), and you are confident in your abilities, I think I would be happy with that. I guess the way you've phrased this is making me reconsider my prejudice that submissive men are weak, don't have skills in the bedroom, and I'd have to do all the work. I don't consider myself a sub, but I do identify with "eager to please", so maybe I have more in me that I realize. I dunno. Interesting thoughts rolling around in my brain at the moment. Thanks for a good topic.

 

[Scarletbegonia]

My dominant partner is focused on my pleasure, so it’s not a D or s thing.

What’s unattractive is do-me subs.

 

[1345864]

I find confidence to be a turn-on... in the real world and in the bedroom. My initial reaction was "meh, not my thing"... but I've got to say, I think the way you phrased this is interesting...

If your "sub-ness" is focused on my pleasure (i.e. eager to please), and you are confident in your abilities, I think I would be happy with that. I guess the way you've phrased this is making me reconsider my prejudice that submissive men are weak, don't have skills in the bedroom, and I'd have to do all the work. I don't consider myself a sub, but I do identify with "eager to please", so maybe I have more in me that I realize. I dunno. Interesting thoughts rolling around in my brain at the moment. Thanks for a good topic.

I do love pleasing my partner very much. I derive intense satisfaction from the other person's pleasure: the sounds they make, their body's movements in reaction to what I'm doing, their hand on my head, knuckles tightening, pulling my hair down toward their crotch in response. I love being there to serve and please them.

I guess it is somewhat of a mental thing, you could say.

 

[Scarletbegonia]

I do love pleasing my partner very much. I derive intense satisfaction from the other person's pleasure: the sounds they make, their body's movements in reaction to what I'm doing, their hand on my head, knuckles tightening, pulling my hair down toward their crotch in response. I love being there to serve and please them.

I guess it is somewhat of a mental thing, you could say.

It definitely is a mental trip.

 

[1365373]

I'm fine with submissive partners. I'm a switch, so submissive or dominant is fine. I won't swap roles back and forth with the same individual, though. If I'm dominant to someone, I would not be able to get into a submissive mindset with them. I've had a few male playmates that were submissive, and one male I dated for a while who was submissive.

Interesting. I have been able to switch back and forth with guys, but not in the same session like some guys want. After I have "forced" a guy to satisfy me orally, the last thing I want is to get fucked or suck his dick. Some guys want to redeem themselves after their oral service. No!