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  1. Is the source of my cock's illusionary large size personal? That is, when it appears enormous, am I relishing memories of complimentary commentary? Couldn't some of the remarks be flattery searching for my humble shortcomings? Could the observance be seduction to my ulterior desires? Has my narcissism suppressed my future development?

    Those questions came to mind as I began addressing my denial of ENVY. I was browsing through past issues of Architectural Digest earlier today. Pretty soon as I realized that I was criticizing some of the amazing designs of enormous sized homes with their luxurious furnishings, I began considering the lifestyle of the buildings' inhabitants. Shortly thereafter, "If only I had the opportunity" thoughts began filtering through my mind, and I began falling into the "poor me" pity pot. As I reflect upon those emotions, I remember growing-up constantly searching for something better.

    I'm constantly searching for more commentary responses to my blogs. I might be searching for affirmation of my sanity or normality. It could be another method of utilizing Large Penis Support Group towards my masturbatory pleasures. I want to explore the topic of penis envy. I envy many cocks that are prettier than mine. There are many features that I wish I possessed. I would prefer my foreskin be shorter, tighter and less wrinkled. I want a larger glans capable of shimmery delight as my knob expands to ultimate tumescence. Along with my virile, rigid erection, I want it to elevate to my belly as I'm strolling along a nude beach capturing bronzing rays of sunshine. Of course my cock's girth should be larger than my current size in order to satisfy my large penis size fantasy.

    As I explore more features of attractive cocks, please share your thoughts and photos:yum.
  2. While arousing my cock this morning [​IMG]
    I am curious whether I've passed into another phase of my habitual masturbation development:confused:.
    Perhaps, I'm revisiting past encounters of reaffirming my libido's maintenance or its existence?
    [​IMG] I'm enjoying the sensations of becoming erect
    [​IMG] and subsiding to flaccidity [​IMG] so I can build it up again [​IMG] to prettiness
    [​IMG] repeatedly over and over, again:yum
    [​IMG] Previously, I may have considered this to be a form of edging, because I'm not achieving an orgasmic release. Today, I'm reevaluating my masturbatory conceptual understanding. How does my narcissism relate to my desire to exhibit my erotic capability and ability to climax? I'm past the age of desiring romantic connections. Why should I still desire attention?
  3. [​IMG] As I lay naked in bed this early Saturday morning stimulating my bare glans, and admiring its expansion, I begin wondering anew about my masturbatory habits. Currently, I'm not stroking my cock to achieve an erotic release of sensual tension. I only want to admire its size. I want others to acknowledge its beauty, also. Thus, over many years my exhibitionism continues to evolve.

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    [​IMG] As I continue stroking more vigorously, I realize that I've lost my intended thesis for this blog entry, and I need a fresh cup of coffee. If I regain my train of thought, I'll continue this entry via the commentary section.
    bisubguy1965, Rohar and michaelmed21 like this.
  4. I discovered some old magazines that I had saved from many years ago. Those magazines represent a time in my life when I became obsessed with cock appearance variability and size comparison beauty. Comparing those images with the multitudes I've viewed on the internet makes me curious about my perspectives.

    Nude models photographed by professionals probably are represented more accurately. I enjoyed the photosets in the magazines, because you could observe the models' cocks becoming more tumescent. Today, I began observing the photographer's perspective of the erect cocks as illusionary. I visualize a gigantic, pretty erection comparing it to the model's flaccid condition and appreciate the physical transformation in awe. Naturally, my narcissism leads me to begin masturbating and justification for exhibitionism.

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    It becomes bothersome to me to realize that my penis size illusions effect my presentation efforts.
    You and michaelmed21 like this.
  5. This blog subject came to mind a couple of months ago as I struggled with the pandemic confinement issues usurping my exhibitionism seasonal enjoyment. Exhibitionism is no fun without voyeurs. It was bad enough when the gyms were shut down last March taking away my outlet for thrills in the shower room, sauna, and steam rooms. As I stroke my cock composing this entry on my lap top sitting naked in bed this warm Monday morning, I'm amazed at the pubic hair grooming neglect that I am exhibiting:eek:. I know that I only shaved completely smooth one time this past summer prior to a nude camping excursion, but I had attempted to keep the hair trimmed short for the remainder of the season.

    Other aspects of my cock's grooming for size illusion besides the camouflaging presented by hair length include the fact that I haven't been circumcised like the vast majority of my peers. Always being self conscious of the "ugliness" of my covered glans, my perception of large sized cocks included the beauty of observing a fat knob becoming tumescent:yum. As I roll my foreskin back and forth across my glans now, I'm enjoying its plump growth:blush:. Conversely, I understand that my long foreskin can create the illusion that my cock appears to be larger than contemporaries. Over the years I've come to embrace the beauty of intact foreskins, and keep mine well groomed for the pleasure of others.

    As I aged, I noticed my pubic hair growing further down the shaft of my cock. That is where I first started shaving to keep bare. The comparative illusion of my larger cock was immediately apparent, and my narcissism took over as I shaved more and more over the past thirty years. The smooth sensations became addictive as I observed more guys shaving their pubic areas, and I continue to feel my cock engorging as I type these words. My shocking discovery this morning came as I observed lengthy hair on my foreskin covering my glans.

    My horniness this morning is compelling me to shave completely bare today, but I hesitate. I'm scheduled for my annual Medicare Wellness physical exam next Monday. I should go ahead and shave, because my Doctor is aware that I am a nudist. He has commented about the absence of tan lines many times during the past twenty years. He's observed my well-groomed pubic area often, also. He's always remained completely professional in regards to my physicality, but I continue to lack the courage to display my completely bare, clean-shaven pubic area to him:confused:.
    michaelmed21 and OldWise like this.
  6. [​IMG]

    REWARDING SENSATIONS:
    Identifying my life's intentional goal? As I was stimulating my cock early this morning, and enjoying the tumescent build-up to firm erections, I jotted down this reminder note. I had a barrage of thoughts that I believed gave me some insights to the development of my daily habit. I should have recorded more notes, because I've forgotten my inspirational enlightenment.

    Gratification from our lessons in life seems to be an universal goal. As I tug on my glans while composing this text, I'm reminded of the astronomical amount of time I've consumed while playing with my cock. Lately, I've chosen to call my masturbation creative motivation. Pleasurable sensations are commanding me to continue the intensity of my cock's stimulus. My focus has been redirected to satisfying immediate desires, so this entry will become incomplete. Hopefully, future comments can help it become more coherent.

    [​IMG] [​IMG] The wife is leaving me alone for a couple of hours, so I'm going to utilize the time for some of my more "outrageous" masturbatory activity:innocent:.
    michaelmed21 likes this.
  7. Early masturbation experiences revisited ... ...
    Cold weather necessitates clothing which suppresses my interest in maintaining a stimulated cock for masturbation enjoyment. Awakening this morning with a plump cock beneath my bed covers led to an hour of masturbation stimulation, and a desire to prolong the experience all day long. Sunday morning routine includes watching four hours "news talk shows" prior to watching football. It is prime time for me to remain naked in bed while reading the newspaper and stroking my cock. My usual dilemma includes covering up with clothing to walk 100 feet down my driveway to retrieve the morning newspaper.

    I think I will have to masturbate while wearing clothing today. It will become an "experiment" as I recall erections that were stimulated during my "dating career" prior to nudity freedom of marriage.
  8. Questioning my personal masturbation philosophies: a ten day period of cock admiration decline

    During my sixty years of exploring the joys of masturbation, I've experienced infrequent periods of diminished libido. Those "periods" always disturb me, because I begin questioning my physical/mental health. With my limited understanding of addiction issues, I know that denial of the problem indicates there is a problem.

    My diminished libido has persisted for close to a few weeks, and I fear it is due to stress. I've always been proud of my ability to handle stressful conditions. I could always count on my masturbation habit as a relaxation technique to come closer to realizing serenity. It bothers me to realize 2020 has revealed such a dysfunctional environment of civility.

    Realize the illusions in order to understand reality. Profound complication persistence of facts ...
    Avoidance of efforts to understand my reality ...
    Continuance of fantasies ...
    Accepting those situations I cannot control or change may help me to regain my libido.

    :)Thoughtful contemplation has created a desire for me to focus on another extended masturbation exercise for the day ahead. As my plump cock progresses towards a firm joy stick, I begin to appreciate life that exists.
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    [​IMG]
    Nexolaris, michaelmed21 and OldWise like this.
  9. Masturbatory edging as meditation or the denial of orgasmic release in search of one's self?

    I was experiencing great pleasure this morning while studiously reading an essay. While naked in bed and having my morning coffee, I began massaging my glans penis. :)I'm still playing with my knob as I type these words. For over two hours of constant stimulation, I have refrained from achieving a firm erection. While embracing my enjoyment, I began to wonder whether my cock's plump condition could relate to my exhibitionistic desires, and my voyeuristic pleasure of observing other cocks.

    Could I be theoretically searching for justification of desiring to enlarge my cock's appearance? Are my illusions of large cocks just a search for self awareness? Do we need to share our masturbatory enlightenment with each other in order to become healthier?

    Self reflection will be my goal as I continue to edge towards orgasmic release today. I don't plan on ejaculating until I fall asleep tonight, so I cannot imagine the potential distractions to my continual stimulation may occur.
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    [​IMG]
    Disciplining myself to enjoy the tease could be challenging.
    OldWise, michaelmed21 and Mario_Silva like this.
  10. I'm exploring new developments in my masturbation edging routines. I might just be experiencing firmer erections, and enjoying the the prolonged intense build-up to ejaculate inevitability. I'm not sure.
    [​IMG] As I am playing with my cock this morning, it is feeling more responsive to various teasing methods:yum.
    michaelmed21, Mister2101 and pp_ryder like this.
  11. As I slipped my glans ring on my cock about five hours ago, I began to wonder whether wearing it was an extension of my masturbation habits. [​IMG]
    I've always worn the rings as an extension of my exhibitionism desires. I've come to realize some would enjoy observing me masturbate. It is usually guys that I meet while camping nude, or observe my nudity at the gym. I have never ejaculated in public, so that became a goal for me a few years ago.

    :rolleyes:Guessing that I will have to search my memories further for recollections of constrictive cock ring masturbation development prior to reaching any conclusions.
    Nexolaris, pp_ryder and Mario_Silva like this.
  12. While admiring my plump cock as I lie naked with my first cup of morning coffee, I realize again that that I fell asleep last night prior to achieving an orgasmic ejaculation. In recent months I've been doing that more frequently, i.e. falling asleep prior to ejaculating. Many times I will awaken at 3:00 a.m. to shoot a load. At times, those sessions can evolve into two hour affairs:yum. Then I end up sleeping until 8:00, and awaken with my cock ready for more attention.

    Habitual masturbation has always guided me through my daily routines. Quite often I utilized the practice as an award for achieving daily goals. Masturbation became an exercise routine for libido maintenance, and motivation for exhibitionism. For many years my nightly orgasm was necessary for me to fall asleep in preparation for the next day's demands. It has taken three years of retirement and a pandemic of societal illness for me to investigate my love hobby more closely. I will address these thoughts today, as I attempt avoid ejaculating prior to falling asleep tonight. :rolleyes:How many erections will I achieve in the next 14 hours?
  13. As I lie naked in my bed this morning admiring my plump cock, I realize that it's reminding me that I failed to have an orgasmic release last night prior to falling asleep. As I sip on my third cup of coffee, I wonder whether it is necessary to begin masturbating. [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG]
    While employed, I never had the leisure to consider this philosophical issue. If I begin masturbating, I will probably neglect proceeding towards my intended goal for today. Retirement means that I can put that goal off until tomorrow, and proceed to enjoy my more pleasurable activity now. As I depart for my fourth cup of coffee, I think I will delay my libido for a few hours.
    Nexolaris, OldWise and crtbike like this.
  14. [​IMG] How have I arrived at this condition? Has my daily habit controlled my personal destiny? Did societal manifestations create a monstrous dysfunctional personality? Do I masturbate in order to abdicate personal responsibilities to the chaos that exists in this world? Does my spiritual condition depend upon the rewards of orgasmic release?

    I've attempted to explore this topic previously. Many experiences throughout my life have affected my masturbation frequency, but the necessity to ejaculate daily has remained constant throughout my past 55 years. As I struggle with the reality of adjusting to the new normality of dealing with our environment, I wonder whether my masturbation habit became a coping mechanism for dealing with social injustice:confused:.

    :rolleyes:I'm about to begin a twelve hour edging session with "controlled" exhibitionistic behavior:blush:.
  15. My foreskin attracts attention. I'm still struggling with my personal preference of observing the bare glans of circumcised cocks. I've grown weary reading about the debates surrounding circumcision issues in many forums on our LPSG pages. I've contributed my thoughts many times, and my narcissism won't permit me to stop focusing upon my cock's display everyday. Much of my internal struggle surrounding exposure of my cock evolves around my perceived assumption that women are more attracted to circumcised penis.

    [​IMG]

    This photo is not me. My foreskin can be observed in my gallery. I will be presenting a clean shaven pubic area to an audience on Friday, though. When I shaved a few days ago, it was for personal egotistical support. It was for my satisfaction without regard to potential voyeurs responding to its appearance. My wife hasn't indicated that she's even noticed my additional bareness, yet.

    My composition's progression has been interrupted. I usually am blogging while naked in bed stroking my cock to maintain a partial erection. My wife awoke and asked me whether I was "journalizing" or in the midst of "conversation". I proceed to explain the topic of my blog, while consuming two more cups of coffee:blush:. Following an hour of chit chat, I'm not sure I can back to my original subject matter.

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    [​IMG][​IMG]

    We discussed my bare pubic area, and my reaction towards observing the "courageous" display exhibited by naturists many years ago at our nudist beach. It took awhile for me to shave completely bare, but I grew to enjoy the additional sensual sensations, and it became routine for me to be "bald" every summer. She was not aware of how many guys like to compliment other guy's cocks. I had explained to her that my go to response whenever my bare pubic area was complimented: "It makes me feel more naked". In actuality, I enjoyed attracting more attention, and felt it created an illusion that my cock was huge.

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    OldWise likes this.
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