being socially dropped by gym rat newbies

[GS_PL]

It's a toss-up where to put this, since it's equal parts safe space & health and fitness. Has anyone experienced permanent social separation from people they knew who became gym addicts, and essentially junked their pre-gym friends for good?

What I find so hurtful about being victimized by this at two entirely different stages of my life is that when I got briefly bit by the fitness bug, for these former "friends" of mine, my level is too below theirs for them to have any interest in giving me the time of day.

We all see it, particularly in the younger guys, of a full-blown obsession of themselves, showing off all the time, and acting as if their past didn't exist prior to looking so attractive in the body. Self-absorbed cockiness is seen as an enamoring quality rather than a lousy one.

 

[Jon1971]

IDK, fitness level has nothing to do with friendship, at least for me. The only thing that changed when I was younger and started going to the gym regularly (3x-5x /wk) was that I became much better friends with the coworker who I'd meet at the gym before work. I think that's a given though. Take a shower with a guy in an open shower room 3 to 5 times a week, becoming better friends is inevitable I think.

 

[JBD_Mikk]

It saddens me that you would experience people doing this. Part of me thinks that if they've gotten so self-absorbed that they're more interested in showing off than in maintaining friendship, they're not worth keeping as friends. But I suppose saying that doesn't actually do anything to help with the loss of their friendship in the moment.

I can only speak from my own experience, but going to the gym has only strengthened my friendship with the guys I join there (who I've known since long before any of us went to the gym). We are all at completely different fitness levels and body types - but it was their friendship that gave me the confidence to join them at the gym in the first place, and to finally (in my early 30s) be at ease being naked in a gym shower.

My only thought would be to keep up with your fitness journey with the hope that you find other people along the way who can be better friends.