Which guy would you want to have a long term relationship with... A) guy cleans house and prepares dinner when he wants to have sex B) guy buys you small things for no reason when he wants to have sex C) guy takes you and with lust in his eyes tells you he wants you in such a way that you know you will be in for a wild time D) guy mentions ahead of time that he wants a date night There are no creative men in this bunch that mix things up... which one would you find most desirable of the choices given.
Not sure I understand the question; do you mean a relationship with two people at once, each with different love-making techniques?
Now that is about what I expected .. C .. , and that is how me and my wife started out, however after being married for 13 years a, b, and d seem to yield a lot higher success rate than c, which in my mind is sad as I yearn for the early years.... ow the memories lol. Do other ppl find this to be true? That over time a, b, and d tend to be the norm or has the spark just fizzled in "my" relationship... Also any ideas on how to reignite a lost spark if that is the case?
None of the above. I want a guy that does house work or gives gifts because he loves me and wants to, not as a means to an end. Also would not select C or D, because C & D together seems like the best mix - wild passion tempered with romance.
A and B do seem a bit contrived, however one reads/hears about all this stuff on how women find men that do house work as a turn on... So of course I tried A and the wife was very happy and it ended with a happy ending lol, and B always seems like a sure winner however from a guys point of view one obviously does not say hey heres that braclet you have been wanting lets rock each others world. It is done as a surprise and then one just lets the natural course of things take place....
yup. and with a. if i was feeling ill or tired, i'd feel pressured as soon as he picked up a duster. at least a sudden desire can be turned down without them sulking bitterly that they'd wasted wooing energy. but... that hungry desire is ugly from a man who has been a shit to you all day. there has to be that desire to make each other happier, whether you get your leg over or not.
Was just having a conversation about what you're experiencing this morning! I can't speak for other women, but I am very turned on by men that consistently contribute to the household by sharing cooking and cleaning duties. Add in gifts, like a massage, love note, or flowers, for no reason at all, and he would be irresistible. :yup: Maybe there's some reason your wife is now reluctant to have sex, such as kids or work (or both) tiring her out. There could also be hormonal, thyroid, or HBC issues. Why not ask her how she feels and then work on bringing intimacy, not just sex, back into the relationship?
Amazing how much of a difference dolfette and shadylady have in opinion which goes to show how ones individual interpretation of a situation plays a major roll in their outcomes. I think you both for your insight... Shady.. ya the wife and I both work long hours and have 2 little ones running around which puts natural stresses on a relationship. We are both very much still in love with each other but getting to a point of intimacy has been harder... It almost like I am trying to reignite the spark without being seen as dolfette is seeing it, where I am doing something for the wife with expectations and her getting pissed or worse her feeling pressured neither of which is desireable. I am really just trying to get a natural flow back in the relationship.