Always retaliate?

[DaveyR]

When people piss you off should you always retaliate? I must admit I usually find it difficult to not retaliate.

I've a personal situation going on just now where I am not retaliating at all. I have to admit that I'm thinking the other parties will be getting pretty frustrated at my lack of reaction. Whatever course they take I will just not react.

Sometimes no reaction can have a bigger effect than a huge rant/confrontation. Yes?

 

[DeepDish]

Yes.

Another good thing about "no reaction" is most likely they will stop trying to fuck with you.

 

[D_Tim McGnaw]

I find the "you're dead to me" technique very handy sometimes. But normally I retaliate because my inner bitch can't resist.

 

[DaveyR]

I find the "you're dead to me" technique very handy sometimes. But normally I retaliate because my inner bitch can't resist.

Exactly. That totally sums me up too. I know what will work but just can't keep my gob shut. :smile:

 

[Remington]

Depends on what is done.

If it's petty shit(trash talk and the like), I just shut the offender out of my life, and hope them the best. (Or that they get face cancer)

If it's a physical attack or something major, I retaliate.

 

[D_Tim McGnaw]

Exactly. That totally sums me up too. I know what will work but just can't keep my gob shut. :smile:

I'm getting better with age though, I just get more and more fedup with drama as the years go by, so I find that I just shrug my shoulders and decide someone suddenly and inexplicably fell off the face of the earth more often these days. :smile:

 

[DaveyR]

Depends on what is done.

If it's petty shit(trash talk and the like), I just shut the offender out of my life, and hope them the best. (Or that they get face cancer)

If it's a physical attack or something major, I retaliate.

Good way of differentiating between what is important and what is not.

I'm getting better with age though, I just get more and more fedup with drama as the years go by, so I find that I just shrug my shoulders and decide someone suddenly and inexplicably fell off the face of the earth more often these days. :smile:

My gawd you'll be a saint by the time you reach the dizzy heights of my age

 

[D_Tim McGnaw]

My gawd you'll be a saint by the time you reach the dizzy heights of my age

Meh, it's just crippling laziness tbh :tongue:

 

[Remington]

Good way of differentiating between what is important and what is not.

The way I see it, if it's "drama fuel", I avoid it. No need for unnecessary bullshit in my life.

If it's an actual threat to me, I deal with it before it can cause further damage.

Self preservation, I guess.

 

[deleted3782]

Is self defense considered retaliation? What's the difference between retaliation and getting the last word?

 

[Remington]

Is self defense considered retaliation? What's the difference between retaliation and getting the last word?

To me, retaliation is a counter to something negative, i.e self-defense, or doing something vengeful to someone who as wronged you.

Getting the last word, is exactly that. Just getting the final say in whatever the conversation/conflict.

 

[Bbucko]

If I retaliated every time something unkind were said in my presence (intentionally or otherwise), I'd be the bitterest and most embattled man in FtL.

Choosing where, when and how to pick one's battles is a prerogative of maturity.

 

[nudeyorker]

It depends entirely on what is said and done... However in matters like this I always ask myself if any of this is going to matter a year from now, and execute my words and actions according the answer.

 

[HazelGod]

It works if the other person is someone reasonable or rational.

If, however, you're dealing with either a retard or a psychopath...or some combination of the two...the silent treatment isn't effective and your only real avenue of recourse may be to shut them out entirely.

 

[Bbucko]

It works if the other person is someone reasonable or rational.

If, however, you're dealing with either a retard or a psychopath...or some combination of the two...the silent treatment isn't effective and your only real avenue of recourse may be to shut them out entirely.

I've been known to use that course myself occasionally

 

[D_Rosalind Mussell]

Not only does it depend on what happened, it depends on who did it. Each individual responds differently to certain actions. Some are unaffected by the silent treatment while others are driven nuts by it. I don't always feel that retaliation is necessary, but if I have a point to get across I choose my mode of delivery with care. I think the only exception for me is my kid. Any attempt to hurt my kid automatically brings out the mother lion in me and all bets are off.

 

[Mickactual]

There are two schools of thought on this:
A) Two wrongs don't make a right.
B) An eye for an eye.

Sometimes no reaction can have a bigger effect than a huge rant/confrontation. Yes?

The "Two wrongs don't make a right" approach has it's merits. Mainly due to the old "The less said, the better" credo. If You keep Your mouth shut - they don't know what You're thinking. Sometimes that can light an even bigger fire under a person's ass than a catfight with them would.


Then there's "An eye for an eye".

normally I retaliate because my inner bitch can't resist.

That's me summed up beautifully. Sure, You open mouth and insert foot more often than You may care to. But let's admit it... Turnabout is fair play. Revenge is sweet. And nothing tastes better than that proverbial Shylock-ian pound of flesh.
:mischievous:

 

[luka82]

My "inner bitch" usually doesn`t give a fuck.

 

[798686]

Only if it's going to achieve something. If it's going to make things worse, what's the point?

 

[flame boy]

I usually only respond to something if there's a point to what I'm going to say. If someone had said something in the hopes of getting a reaction from me, I usually ignore it - by replying all you are doing is giving them more ammunition. I've been told I'm very difficult to argue with, because I don't rise to bait most of the time.

One in a blue moon I will release my inner Alexis Carrington.