An encounter with a UK actor. Feeling guilt.

[MGeorgeRunner]

Hi everyone, I’m new here and this is my first post. Came across the site by accident and hoping somebody can offer me some advice on my thoughts and feelings.

I’m a straight male. Or so I thought. Never been particularly curious, admire a good looking man and that’s that.
I’ve got a 8 month old child, good friendship group and long term relationship.
Life has been good and I’m blessed to be saying that.

I’ve got a friend who is part of my friendship circle who has been for some time, he’s a recognisable face as an actor on tv, not that it matters, but I’ve discovered he even has a thread on this site.
He’s straight, don’t want to say too much but yeah. He’s got his life in order too.

I’ve got another close mate and we don’t necessarily go out drinking they’re a bit older than me, so we spend more time together either doing activities or at home.

Something has happened recently where I caught him having sex with his partner. It wasn’t immediately noticeable I was there, I didn’t walk away. I stood watching until this pal of mine clocked me and smirked towards me and then went down on his partner so I could see everything.

I left and didn’t see him until two days later. We had a laugh and a smirk about it. We went running together.
When got back to my house he seemed smug and it’s usual for us to shower straight away at whichever house we’re at. Nothing strange or weird. We chat as each of us shower, nudity between us has never been a big deal either, but this time was different. I was looking at him and staring at him. He saw me looking.
He turned round towards me with an erection. He said some things to me I don’t really want to share, just a personal comment or two about me, saying before he knew me he thought I was gay. He started flexing his muscles towards me and I ended up sucking him.
My heads fucked up and I can’t stop thinking about him. Not only that, after I sucked him I started touching him and I’ve become obsessed thinking about him and looking at him. There’s more to this, but I don’t really know how to put all my thoughts down.

We both have kids. I’m cautious of now keeping this secret because we both have lots to lose.
I feel like every moment I’m thinking of him. Or wanting to talk to him? My other friend has picked up in acting weird. What do I do?

 

[MGeorgeRunner]

Sorry if I wrote too much for a first post.

 

[Jjij]

Hello, so pardon the pun but to get things “straight”, you both are in heterosexual relationships at present and then you are having some feelings for him now something has happened between you two right?

I would start by; if you can discussing things with him and see what he thinks of the situation, do you feel it is a real attraction or just being brought on by something new/something you thought was forbidden?

What other concerns do you have?

 

[MGeorgeRunner]

Hello, so pardon the pun but to get things “straight”, you both are in heterosexual relationships at present and then you are having some feelings for him now something has happened between you two right?

I would start by; if you can discussing things with him and see what he thinks of the situation, do you feel it is a real attraction or just being brought on by something new/something you thought was forbidden?

What other concerns do you have?

Hey thanks for replying. Yes that’s right. Alongside the fact of discovering this persons thread on thus site and actually realising this is quite a big deal and many people I’m sure would be envious in this situation. It feels a lot of pressure to maintain.

I’m scared of opening up in an emotional way when I can sense my obsession has already turned into more than that. Feelings.

It’s distracting me because I can’t think of anything else. I’ve even (probably unhealthily) slept at his house recently as a sleep over but just wanting to be close by to him.

Every detail just won’t leave my head!

 

[Jjij]

Do you normally have these kinds of reactions/feelings with girls in the past?

 

[MGeorgeRunner]

Do you normally have these kinds of reactions/feelings with girls in the past?

Not to this extent no… it’s just on my mind all the time.

 

[Jjij]

It’s seems there is quite a bit to unpack here; you mentioned about them having a thread on here and that adding pressure to you because of that, but what do you feel is driving that?

It sounds like there is some form of physical attraction; do you still have this, say for example if you were in a room with him now and there was the same situation; flirting you would want to do the same as you’ve done, have you thought about taking it further?

I assume you are only thinking this with him; or starting to look around and questioning others?

How would you feel if you were to find out it wasn’t his first time with another guy?

 

[MGeorgeRunner]

It’s seems there is quite a bit to unpack here; you mentioned about them having a thread on here and that adding pressure to you because of that, but what do you feel is driving that?

It sounds like there is some form of physical attraction; do you still have this, say for example if you were in a room with him now and there was the same situation; flirting you would want to do the same as you’ve done, have you thought about taking it further?

I assume you are only thinking this with him; or starting to look around and questioning others?

How would you feel if you were to find out it wasn’t his first time with another guy?

I know! I feel like I’m in therapy session. Probably need it to be fair

I discovered my pals thread on here and all the guys here admiring him etc and it’s made me feel how lucky I am, not to only have him as a mate, but this whole situation happening to me that others have clearly fantasised about.

I would definitely take it further. I’ve tried/trying to make what happened happen again, at the detriment of being able to focus on anything else!

It’s only happening with him, mostly.

My mindset is becoming quite destructive in thought.

 

[CUBE]

I think you are making it bigger than it is. People can be attracted to each other for many reasons. You both share a physical attraction but also are close friends. I think your encounter was about closeness and desire but also male bonding. Just enjoy the pleasure and closeness and let it be just that. Sounds like you both had a great experience.

 

[MGeorgeRunner]

Old ones of him and BF

And that shirtless scene in the showers…omfg

This was a great episode. He was adorable, totally hot, funny (especially with all his wide-eyed WTF moments. It was good to see him be a significant focus character for the episode.

I think you are making it bigger than it is. People can be attracted to each other for many reasons. You both share a physical attraction but also are close friends. I think your encounter was about closeness and desire but also male bonding. Just enjoy the pleasure and closeness and let it be just that. Sounds like you both had a great experience.

What if I want more than that?

 

[CUBE]

Well. I think right now it’s built up in your mind more as a fantasy. But I’d be just enjoying it and the time you can bond and play safe

 

[piercesawyer744]

If you're having second thoughts about your sexuality, you NEED to have a conversation with your partner. Odds are you've already done what she's going to consider cheating by letting it get physical at all. Keeping that a secret from her any longer is not fair to her or your child. She needs to make an informed decision on how your relationship is going to proceed from here.

You need to figure out what you want there, too, before you should be worrying at all about what you want from him.

 

[MGeorgeRunner]

If you're having second thoughts about your sexuality, you NEED to have a conversation with your partner. Odds are you've already done what she's going to consider cheating by letting it get physical at all. Keeping that a secret from her any longer is not fair to her or your child. She needs to make an informed decision on how your relationship is going to proceed from here.

You need to figure out what you want there, too, before you should be worrying at all about what you want from him.

Appreciate it pal

 

[Brodie888]

From my perspective, it sounds like your friend has probably had previous experiences with other men.

He lives a heterosexual lifestyle but is most likely bisexual. Being in the acting world, there would have been plenty of opportunity to cross over.

In your case, I think that you are also bisexual but mostly straight. You have had a small gay side that has never been triggered because you have been perfectly content until now swimming in the straight pool.

The reason why you're obsessing is because a whole new world of sexual experience has opened up to you.

You are also going through the infatuation phase of feelings for a new sex partner which would happen if met a new woman as well.

Cast your mind back to your first experiences with a relationship with a woman. Probably very similar.

In a way, the fact that you both have a lot to lose may be a good thing. It means the odds of being blackmailed or the secret getting out are low.


What to do? Well that's between you and him. This could be the start of a mutually beneficial arrangement. This could be the start of a major problem. It comes down to having a frank discussion.

The question is what do you think that you want and whether what you want is realistic or not.

 

[MGeorgeRunner]

From my perspective, it sounds like your friend has probably had previous experiences with other men.

He lives a heterosexual lifestyle but is most likely bisexual. Being in the acting world, there would have been plenty of opportunity to cross over.

In your case, I think that you are also bisexual but mostly straight. You have had a small gay side that has never been triggered because you have been perfectly content until now swimming in the straight pool.

The reason why you're obsessing is because a whole new world of sexual experience has opened up to you.

You are also going through the infatuation phase of feelings for a new sex partner which would happen if met a new woman as well.

Cast your mind back to your first experiences with a relationship with a woman. Probably very similar.

In a way, the fact that you both have a lot to lose may be a good thing. It means the odds of being blackmailed or the secret getting out are low.


What to do? Well that's between you and him. This could be the start of a mutually beneficial arrangement. This could be the start of a major problem. It comes down to having a frank discussion.

The question is what do you think that you want and whether what you want is realistic or not.

Can’t thank you enough for this. It’s making me think a lot. Thank you

 

[Brodie888]

It's possible he has an open relationship with his wife. That’s becoming more common.

The thing you need to be on top of is STIs. If your wife gets an STI, in this day and age, she won't believe she got it from a public toilet seat!

 

[hzs3fg]

OP, why did you feel the need to tell us your friend is "a UK actor"? The fact doesn't really seem pertinent to the story.

Name-dropping? Without the name?

Bragging?

I'm truly curious.

 

[piercesawyer744]

I think a bit of a casual brag is legitimate here, in addition to the aspect he already expressed which is that he feels as though he's lucky to have the gotten the opportunity with a friend that strangers would kill to do the same to.

 

[Rooker]

Let your girlfriend know you like cheating on her so she can deal with it how she wants. Then you can sort out if you are bi or gay.

 

[Cum_is_Great]

OP, why did you feel the need to tell us your friend is "a UK actor"? The fact doesn't really seem pertinent to the story.

Name-dropping? Without the name?

Bragging?

I'm truly curious.

Last week month there was a new account of a self proclaimed "UK Brit actor" who "cant believe he made a LPSG account" and "meeting with men who recognize him". Now another new account is talking about a "UK actor" and their happenstance of having sex.

No offense to the OP. I'm not explicitly saying or accusing of lying. But my BS meter made a blip. Just sayin

Edit: Found the thread
Brit Actor, Famous, Enjoy Getting Used