Bisexual = Bi/romantic?????????????

[Capitolhillguy]

I've done erotic massage for 37 years mostly on bisexual/curious guys. By this time I've seen many thousands of guys. I am chatty and talk with clients. Aside from guys like me who are older and got married because of societal pressure back in the 60's and 70's, 97% of my bisexual clients fall into the category of guys who are romantic with women but like sport sex with guys without strong romantic feelings. I suspect most men fall somewhere in this category, whether they act on it or not. Actually a big majority of my clients never try sex with guys till they are over 35. Have any of you been in LOVE with both men and women? I've encountered this very very rarely in guys under 45. I suspect the vast majority of you fall into the partner with women but have sport sex with guys category. Wish I could have done a poll.

 

[18wheeler]

46. I was more romantic with women and my bi side was more just physical. Though I’ve never been able to pursue my bisexual needs. However. The older I get. I find I want the love/intimacy with a male as much as I do with a woman.

 

[Petnax]

I happen to have fallen in love with both a man and a woman (was in a relationship with both)

I don't doubt that your observations are true. Sometimes it feels like gay guys have more "sport sex with guys without strong romantic feelings" too though. So maybe it's less of a bi thing and more of a men being horny buggers... thing.

 

[halcyondays]

Yes but with many more women than men because I find women much more attractive than men.

Outside of being engaged three times in youth for short periods--to women--I've had no exclusive relationships with either sex.

 

[thickofficeworker]

Have I had sex with women without accompanying strong romantic feelings? Nope

Have I had sex with men without accompanying strong romantic feelings? Yes

Have I had strong romantic feelings for men I've had sex with? Yes

Have the strong romantic feelings preceded the sex? Sometimes

My last two encounters with men were friendly, but no need to be more than acquaintances and no romantic attraction. Just physical.

There is a guy whom I was seeing who decided to end it because of the feelings. We are both married (he to a man, me to a woman) and he decided to refocus on his marriage. Happy for him, disappointed for me. The romantic feelings made it better.

 

[Capitolhillguy]

Very little response as I expected. Most bi men like sex with men but make love with women.

 

[bi2]

Very little response as I expected. Most bi men like sex with men but make love with women.

Both myself and my fuckbuddy love women and make love with women. For us MM sex is a sexual outlet and provides for us a physical release. My fuckbuddy is married and gets his emotional needs meet by his wife, similarly for me I get mine met by girlfriends.

Thats not to say though while our sex is purely carnal and physical that elements of love dont take place. There are occasional genuine times, he makes love to me, where the sex is gentle, caring, nurturing and passionate. Its a welcomed and enjoyable difference, to the aggresive dominant rough sex that he has with me. The contrasting styles allow me to appreciate both forms of having MM sex. However, his and my preference is when he is an aggresive Alpha Domiant Top male. I dont dictate when he feels like making love to me, nor should I.

 

[Capitolhillguy]

Both myself and my fuckbuddy love women and make love with women. For us MM sex is a sexual outlet and provides for us a physical release. My fuckbuddy is married and gets his emotional needs meet by his wife, similarly for me I get mine met by girlfriends.

Thats not to say though while our sex is purely carnal and physical that elements of love dont take place. There are occasional genuine times, he makes love to me, where the sex is gentle, caring, nurturing and passionate. Its a welcomed and enjoyable difference, to the aggresive dominant rough sex that he has with me. The contrasting styles allow me to appreciate both forms of having MM sex. However, his and my preference is when he is an aggresive Alpha Domiant Top male. I dont dictate when he feels like making love to me, nor should I.

You are somewhere in the middle. Nice to hear from you.

 

[jthomasmpls]

I like Robyn Ochs’ definition of bisexuality – ‘I call myself bisexual because I acknowledge that I have in myself the potential to be attracted – romantically and/or sexually – to people of more than one sex and/or gender, not necessarily at the same time, not necessarily in the same way, and not necessarily to the same degree.’

 

[thickgeo]

When I was younger I actually felt stronger romantic feelings for men than as I got older. My first serious bout of lovesickness was over this gorgeous kid in high school, but nothing ever happened between us. All of my relationships have been with women though. I have considered it maybe dating men beyond sex, though, now that I'm in my early 30s. I think it could be a good fit, but I just feel closer bond and sexual attraction with women. My interest in men usually revolves around their being endowed haha.

 

[bi2]

When I was younger I actually felt stronger romantic feelings for men than as I got older. My first serious bout of lovesickness was over this gorgeous kid in high school, but nothing ever happened between us. All of my relationships have been with women though. I have considered it maybe dating men beyond sex, though, now that I'm in my early 30s. I think it could be a good fit, but I just feel closer bond and sexual attraction with women. My interest in men usually revolves around their being endowed haha.

Ive noticed for myself at least, when my fuckbuddy cums inside me from fucking me, for a short period of time, I do have strong emotional/romantic feelings for him. He told me that unlike oral sex, fucking someone via anal sex, is the most intimate act that there is for MM sex he sometimes feels that way as well. Basically two men become one, so its only natural to have these intense short lived emotions and bonding experience.

Neither one of us has any desire to be with one another outside of sex.

 

[goldscorpguy]

As a married bisexual I have never found the space in my life to have more than one romantic relationship. Romance is what binds me to one person, it is my anchor. My attraction to men is purely sexual, purely physical. I don't see physical sex without romance as somehow secondary. For me, a sexual relationship can be just as intense and sometimes more so. When a man is inside me it's like he connects to this untapped energy which, for many years, I never knew I had.

 

[bi2]

As a married bisexual I have never found the space in my life to have more than one romantic relationship. Romance is what binds me to one person, it is my anchor. My attraction to men is purely sexual, purely physical. I don't see physical sex without romance as somehow secondary. For me, a sexual relationship can be just as intense and sometimes more so. When a man is inside me it's like he connects to this untapped energy which, for many years, I never knew I had.

Its a good point you make. My attraction to my fuckbuddy is purely from the desire to be fucked anally. I do crave that every few weeks. Its purely a carnal physical desire.

If I happen to sleepover, its only because of opportunity to have sex again. Even when that happens, he will go about his day working in his study and I will just chill with TV or on the computer. When the mood strikes him again, we have sex again right away. In many ways its a very slutty physical relationship we have. I wouldnt want it any other way. Its a huge turn on and flattering.

 

[badnicky1]

I’ve been deeply in love with both. Goes all the way back to my adolescent years.

 

[Capitolhillguy]

I’ve been deeply in love with both. Goes all the way back to my adolescent years.

You are a rare find, sir. I have met a handful of guys in a threeway relationship with a woman and a man but that is not common. Being married and cheating is LOL.