"cock accidents"

[JaimeB]

Have you ever had a cock accident? let me give some examples:

one time i was at the movies with a friend. i got up to go take a leak, and lost my balance. when i put out a hand to catch myself, it landed on my buddy's crotch, and i ended up getting a pretty good idea of exactly what he was packing.

another time, at the gym, there was a guy nearby me who was sitting on a stool kinda hogging the space between rows of lockers. i was headed to the shower, and just as i was squeezing by him, he turned his head, and i wound up smacking him in the face with my cock. i made a quick apology and kept on walking.

i wouldn't be surprised if most people have had this one: you're jerking off and getting ready to cum, you are so gooned out you're not real aware of stuff, and you end up squirting in an open eye (that shit burns!), or even your open mouth.

last one, a little more intimate and maybe more embarrassing: you and a buddy are watching porn and the two of you get to jerking off. again, you are so gooned out that when you shoot, some of it lands on your bro.

i'm curious if other guys have experienced these (or similar) "cock accidents," and if so, what you guys' reaction was, or the other persons's (if there was one).

 

[unzipped]

got a big load in a eye once...damn burned and looked like I had pink eye all day...guess I was cockeyed...

 

[johnny989]

well of course cum eye, but i suppose we all do it once and never again

dont know if this qualifies but once i was showering with a friend after swimming in a shower room with 5 shower heads, we were alone and he decided to wankoff. at one point i creeped behind him and reached for his cock. he jumped and said, what the hell are you doing, but not for the obvious reason of touching his dick, but because of a gift he left on my hand, he was cumming at that moment
and of course while wrestling with my buddy, i always somehow (intentionally of course but to him it looked as an accident) grab his dick... he packs a beautiful fat hairy uncut dick... mmm

 

[basque9]

In 1957, I was having sex in Paris with a French guy who was sucking my cock ! When I told him I was cumming, he pushed my cock out of his mouth and it shot in one of his eyes! A year later, I saw him and he informed me I owed him 50,000 francs($150) , because he said his eye became infected and he had to see an eye specialist in Nice. I totally felt he had concocted the infection story and refused to pay him!

 

[craig_uk]

I had a guy sucking my cock and I was getting close and knew he wasn't keen on me shooting in his mouth. I was just about to tell him when he took his mouth away from my cock. I thought that he had realised I was about to cum but he hadn't, he just wanted a breath of air, and within seconds he plunged back to on my cock as i shot my load.

 

[PaloSantoMarron]

one time, i was jerking off and unintentionally shot off right into the corner of my mouth. it kind of freaked me out at a bit the time because i wasn't expecting it. this was also way back before i had ever sucked a guy's dick.

this other time wasn't so much an accident, but i entered the shower at this beach bathhouse where i used to go after a day at the beach several years ago. i was used to showering nude there around other men of all ages, but one time i entered the shower and felt a little awkward because i was the only guy standing there nude and it was packed with other guys showering in their swimsuits.

 

[ginger_qboy]

In 1957, I was having sex in Paris with a French guy who was sucking my cock ! When I told him I was cumming, he pushed my cock out of his mouth and it shot in one of his eyes! A year later, I saw him and he informed me I owed him 50,000 francs($150) , because he said his eye became infected and he had to see an eye specialist in Nice. I totally felt he had concocted the infection story and refused to pay him!

Concocted is right. Health care is FREE across Europe.

 

[Silvertip]

... you end up squirting in an open eye (that shit burns!), or even your open mouth ...

I've ended up squirting into my open mouth many a time ..... but never by accident!

 

[D_BenJo_Ahanakokolele]

In 1957, I was having sex in Paris with a French guy who was sucking my cock ! When I told him I was cumming, he pushed my cock out of his mouth and it shot in one of his eyes! A year later, I saw him and he informed me I owed him 50,000 francs($150) , because he said his eye became infected and he had to see an eye specialist in Nice. I totally felt he had concocted the infection story and refused to pay him!

how old are you? lol

 

[lowhung]

I once was in a locker room and had forgotten my towel after a workout. I went to take a shower - just basically crossing the lockeroom entirely nude. Two very overweight guys entirely dressed were having an animated conversation right near the shower area. As I passed them, I tried to make myself skinny - getting up on my tiptoes and sucking in my stomach but my penis was just too long and tapped one of the men on his back. I was just extemely embarrassed!

 

[JaimeB]

great stories, guys. here's one from me.

when i was still in high school, i used to hang w a coupla guys. we had the same period p.e., and our lockers there were close to each other. i saw these bros bareass a lot, and i kinda admired their bods. they got to talking one time about some porn one of 'em had, and from their conversation i got that they made a habit of jerking off to porn together. i asked about the porn, and they said, "come and see for yourself." so, being a big fan of jerking off, i went with them back to the one guy's house.

long story short: they showed me this mag, n soon, cocks came out n clothes came off. we were all getting kinda close after edging awhile n talking horny shit, and i felt myself starting to cum. my eyes were half shut, but i realized a second too late that i was gonna jizz on the one dude's belly. i did land one big shot on him, but quickly pointed my dick the other way only to end up spewing even more spootch on the other guy. the first guy started to look real upset that i cummed on him, but when he saw me jizz on the other, he started to laugh. just then, the other guy started to cum n ended up dumping his whole load on his buddy (at least 3 big squirts) almost square on top of where i landed my first one.

i didn't know what wd happen next. the one who had both our jizz on him stopped laughing and looked real serious. now, after all that unexpected jizz flying, he didn't look ready to spew anymore. but then he suddenly scooped up both our jizz off his belly, n started uisng it for lube. after that, he came real quick, aiming on purpose for his bud, and hit him right on his cock. soon both his and my jizz was dripping off his buddies cock onto his mom's clean linoleum floor. we did our best to wipe up our big cum mess, but we left a kinda shiny spot where all that jizz landed.

we had a few other fun times after, but no more "accidents" as freaky as that.

 

[jockmaestro]

great stories, guys. here's one from me.

when i was still in high school, i used to hang w a coupla guys. we had the same period p.e., and our lockers there were close to each other. i saw these bros bareass a lot, and i kinda admired their bods. they got to talking one time about some porn one of 'em had, and from their conversation i got that they made a habit of jerking off to porn together. i asked about the porn, and they said, "come and see for yourself." so, being a big fan of jerking off, i went with them back to the one guy's house.

long story short: they showed me this mag, n soon, cocks came out n clothes came off. we were all getting kinda close after edging awhile n talking horny shit, and i felt myself starting to cum. my eyes were half shut, but i realized a second too late that i was gonna jizz on the one dude's belly. i did land one big shot on him, but quickly pointed my dick the other way only to end up spewing even more spootch on the other guy. the first guy started to look real upset that i cummed on him, but when he saw me jizz on the other, he started to laugh. just then, the other guy started to cum n ended up dumping his whole load on his buddy (at least 3 big squirts) almost square on top of where i landed my first one.

i didn't know what wd happen next. the one who had both our jizz on him stopped laughing and looked real serious. now, after all that unexpected jizz flying, he didn't look ready to spew anymore. but then he suddenly scooped up both our jizz off his belly, n started uisng it for lube. after that, he came real quick, aiming on purpose for his bud, and hit him right on his cock. soon both his and my jizz was dripping off his buddies cock onto his mom's clean linoleum floor. we did our best to wipe up our big cum mess, but we left a kinda shiny spot where all that jizz landed.

we had a few other fun times after, but no more "accidents" as freaky as that.

This sure blurs the line between accidental and intentional! It's one thing to put your hand on a buddy's bulge because you have to steady yourself to keep from falling, but can a three-way jerk off jizz landing really be called an "accident"?:wink:

 

[JBJacker89]

well of course cum eye, but i suppose we all do it once and never again

never EVER again! my eye was dry for days...

 

[JaimeB]

This sure blurs the line between accidental and intentional! It's one thing to put your hand on a buddy's bulge because you have to steady yourself to keep from falling, but can a three-way jerk off jizz landing really be called an "accident"?:wink:

well, the circle jerk was deliberate, but the jizzing on the other guys was unintentional. at that time, i thought the first guy was really gonna get upset. maybe u cd call it a comedy of errors...

 

[Gisella]

I wish I had..but I haven't.

 

[At.your.cervix]

Aside from squirting in my eyes (I've now learned to wear glasses when jerking off), I have one recurring "cock accident." I typically wear briefs to both keep my dick and balls in place, but also to not be too obvious about the details of what's beneath my pants. All is fine except when I'm in a crowded bar and I have to squeeze behind a taller young lady: my previously discrete bulge unavoidably winds up pressing up against her butt in a rather significant way as I pass behind. I think most of the guys in here with both large balls and very large soft cocks who wear briefs know exactly what I'm talking about. This always results in a over-the-shoulder look right in the face: sometimes it's a look of "How rude, you pervert" but frequently it's a coy smile.

 

[Wrat]

I was fucking this nice looking Irish woman named Cathleen from behind. She told me to pull out and come on her back, so I did and ended up squirting a huge load all over the back of her head and neck. This was a problem because we were actually just getting ready to go out and doing a fast slam before walking out the door. She had done her hair and makeup and all that, so I was kind of in trouble. We laughed about it and cleaned her up as best we could. She would walk up to me every once in a while and turn her head and ask me if her hair was okay all night. It was hilarious.

 

[11ish]

One time on a field exercise, somene found a live round. So they had us remove all our stuff from our pockets and line up to make sure no one had any more live rounds. So an officer is going down the line, stops at me and says," I thought you were told to remove every thing from your pockets." I said I did. He pokes me in the dick and says," then what's this? You have something right here." I lean forward and try to quietly say,"um sir that's my penis." A few people snicker, he gets redfaced, and his eyes open wide, then just steps to he next guy

 

[IrishWank]

Few years ago I was hanging out with friends, a guy and a girl. She really liked him but he wasnt too interested. He was sitting on a low wall when she came and stood in between his legs paying him a lot of attention, rubbing his legs and talking dirty. It was funny to watch.
Then she moved her hand under his t-shirt for a rub but when she did this, the t-shirt moved up and I seen his boner poking out of the top of his trousers. He looked at me and knew I seen it and we started laughing. She didnt see it as she was too busy looking into his eyes.

 

[deleted136887]

In 1957, I was having sex in Paris with a French guy who was sucking my cock ! When I told him I was cumming, he pushed my cock out of his mouth and it shot in one of his eyes! A year later, I saw him and he informed me I owed him 50,000 francs($150) , because he said his eye became infected and he had to see an eye specialist in Nice. I totally felt he had concocted the infection story and refused to pay him!

So is he keeping an eye out for you? after all these years.

I suppose nowadays it is not cock accidents but "Penis malfunctions" like in "wardrobe malfunctions" when someone famous tit pops out "unintentionally"